Any recommendations for a psychotherapist for ds with ASD? CAMHS waiting lists too long.

[pinkorkid]

DS is refusing school again since Easter holidays - issues to do with anxiety around social situations, intrusive thoughts, possible depression, growing self-awareness of his differences, self-consciousness about tics etc. (Background is that he was previously out of school for about 18 months after failing to cope on starting mainstream secondary and after a long battle gained a place at a very good special school where he was initially happy.)

Although he has a long history with CAMHS, they insisted he had to be treated as a new referral. We spoke to GP who agreed to make an urgent referral. Took 2 weeks for the letter to be sent. CAMHS say mid June at the earliest for an initial screening appointment to evaluate whether he needs to be seen by anyone or not, then who knows how many weeks on another waiting list. Meanwhile the longer he is out of school the more entrenched his demand avoidant behaviour will become, plus anxiety levels will continue to escalate.

We are on a very low income so can't really afford to go private but will eat macaroni cheese for next 3 months attempt to fund private consultation if that is the only way to get help.

But we're not sure how to go about finding the right person. Do we need to see a clinical psychiatrist/psychologist/ some other type of therapist? He has responded well to cognitive behavioural therapy in the past.

Ideally we would like personal recommendations from parents whose dc have had similar problems and been successfully treated. We are in the south-east of England, so London, Surrey, Sussex, Kent would be most accessible but we would travel further for the right person.

Meanwhile the plan is to approach PALS to see if we can get anywhere through the complaints procedure re the overlong waiting times but not holding out too much hope there.

(Need to go to work shortly so will not be able to acknowledge any replies until this evening but thanks in advance if anyone can help.)

so what you are saying is it's my fault!!!!!!!!!!!!

Devient, i feel exactly the same. Experts are experts for a reason (including parents), bloody listen to them!

I really dont get why some teachers feel they are qualified to disagree with experts. Although their 'disagreeing' is never done in front of experts, more 'we are providing that help, just not the help that you recommended, our version of what you recommended'

In ds's case, its half hearted help.

the behaviour team and OT's etc have all used force to get him out the door and bundled in a taxi. So you allow nightmares, high anxiety, depression etc as long as a parent forces!!

He is a big strong lad and it took 2 men to remove him when he was only 7, he's now 11

Why don't they look at what he says makes him scared of school, thats all a lot of people ask now!!!!!!!!!!!

Selk, i agree totally, but education specialists and education services are not the specialists in emotional difficulties, CAMHS are, which is why they should provide school with recommendations.

same here Claw, only school have played a load of psychological games in the process.......the whole system around my son is corrupt !!!

They are scared to be caught out in what they are NOT doing!!!

School could of reported my sons reluctance to EWO but didn't!!!!

They could of reported him not getting to school till dinnertime, they didn't!!!!!!!!!

They could of reported him not getting there at all..........they didn't!!!!!!!!

I reported him off school !!!!!!!

And the EWO agreed school are covering!!!!!!!!!!!!

As they didn't even mention him in the meeting after my call !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and CAMHS here don't take SLD !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Catch 22 but that's all right blame me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sorry so annoyed !!!!!!!!!!

This is a historic case with at least 7 years of difficulties no one is helping or supporting and selk comes along and adds to the problems!!

Devent, no I am not saying it is your fault. I don't know where you got that idea from. I'm just saying that no community service can forcefully move a child.

I'm sorry that you have had a really difficult time getting things dsorted for your son, Devent.

but they do and try calling it restraint !!

Just look at what he's scared of and help them.

It's not asking much ??

Must also add DS is primarily down syndrome.

Devent can I suggest that you request school to instigate a CAF for your son as it will mean a CAF meeting will take place and get everyone from all services involved, including you, round the table to begin to address the problems.

Can In just say that as someone who professionally specialises in kids with an ASD, I have met Dev's son and spent time with him; he clearly cannot be moved when he refuses and there is much, much more going on that the LEA admit. He needs a far more specialist placement but barriers have been placed in their way that can't be overcome without some serious changes in policy or visits to specialist clinics around the UK, things that take time.

Dev drove for 7 hours to see me and had to rent a house for the duration; she is a very committed mother with a child who has soem very uniquer and hard to break down challenges.

Devent does he have a social worker in the children with disabilities team?

I asked about 4 year ago for a CAF and they refused as he is known to the system!!!!!!!!!

The very system that is letting him down!!!

Sorry OP, your thread is getting hijacked.

Yes he has a SW who is ignored and doing her best with a child she sees needs a great lot of help. In fact she sits in the meetings saying how hard her case load is and how she can mange all her caseload with the exception of one child...................mine!!

Thanks Peachy and sorry Pink

Selk, the problem with CAF, is it is just used for other professionals to tell other professionals what a marvellous job they are doing. All bases are covered.

I have never met a professional, who is prepared to say, i should have done x, but i didnt and this needs to be addressed.

For example school will say 'yes we are following the recommendations' when in fact what they are doing is following their version of the recommendations, not the actual recommendations.

For example my ds is required to have his own laptop, with appropriate software, recommended by EP as he finds handwriting difficult and cannot see the whiteboard.

What school have given him, is he can have a hard copy when the class is working from whiteboard.

Now a kid sitting in a classroom, who is struggling to write and cant see the whiteboard, it is going to cause that kid a certain amount of anxiety. This is where i would expect CAMHS to step in, but they dont.

Thats just one example of many.

sorry mini rant over............I'm sitting here thinking of the child I lost on his what would be 16th birthday, looking at my disabled son who is being dropped from a mighty height by the people who should be supporting him.

Anyway as Claw says professionals won't say what they are not doing or doing badly/wrongly etc.

If the correct support was in place would these kids be out of school??

Devient, exactly with the correct support in place these kids probably would not be out of school. So sorry you having such a rough time.

Selk, why do you think CAMHS are reluctant to speak up about such issues in school?

For exampe although my laptop example is an educational recommendation made from an EP, the implications are also emotional if this recommendation is not followed. So CAMHS do have a part to play in educational recommendations, albeit indirectly. I know that CAMHS cannot force school to follow recommendations and their recommendation of school following recommendations, could also be ignored, but i am interested in why CAMHS see it as not being their role?

As i said earlier my experience of CAMHS on the whole has been a positive one, but they do shy away from school conflicts, even if they know difficulties at school are one of the main factors for the child's emotional distress.

and why do CAMHS shy away from the severe and complex???

Huge range of emotions today but another to add to this in a way. DD, MS, ADHD and ODD, recommendations went in, school are very acceptable in fact they are OTT, it's great. She is buzzing atm, has txt many times as well as FB....................she has got an A in her controlled assessment for business studies, which was hours long over a few days. In fact she was 2 marks away from an A*, the school have sent it back for another look, to gain the higher level.

See what happens when the school are not afraid of problems or saying where they can go wrong and are open and down to earth !!!

meant to add she was a school refuser for about 6months.

dev, I'm sorry to hear of your loss. This must be very hard for you, so many what might have beens. I know how isolating it has been for you striving to get support for your son when no one agency or professional seems to be willing or able to help. You don't need to apologise for any highjack - your experiences show sadly lack of support for children out of school is not uncommon.
By the way, I don't think selks was meaning to blame you although protocols about who can use reasonable force to make children do something do mean all the responsiblity falls on the parents.

Devient, i think CAMHS shy away, once they realise that the majority of the cause for anxiety lies with school and not the parents. I found they were quick to question my parenting and offered for a short period of time 'parent sessions' to establish whether i was the cause of ds's anxieties (as school as claimed and no dx at the time). Had they established that i was the cause, im also sure they would have given me advice and support.

Shame they could not offer school the same sessions or even some training for staff. School are expected to 'manage' ds's anxieties, although they have no experience or training of this. A far better and simplier recommendation would have been follow the bloody recommendations made by experts and this will reduce his anxieties.

We had CAMHs for ds1 when he was bad with his eating disorders. Wow, what a waste of time, knew it would be when they asked me to tell them about autism. I man- wtf?

I don't think ALL CAMHs people could be so dim, and I feel sure there must be many who are fabulous but not the one I met.