Ds being overly kind, what to do?

[claw4]

This morning i stopped ds taking something into school. He got really upset and it will be probably set the whole tone for his day.

He had made 'tickets' out of pieces of paper ie bits of paper with the childrens names in his class written on them. He also had 3 pens and he was planning on doing a 'raffle' and giving the pens away in the playground.

I know that he desperately wants others to like him and he thinks this can be achieved by giving things away.

Anyhow i know that the other children will find this a 'strange' thing for him to be doing and will probably make fun of him or take advantage of him.

DP thinks its no big deal, just a game and i should let him do it. Ds is 8 years old btw.

Am i being overly cautious?

Hmmn, tricky.

My ds1 is slightly younger and nt but with a similar need to be liked, esp. by the 'bigger boys'. When he wanted to do something similar recently (w. football cards in his case) we gently dissuaded/forbade him (no free swaps). I reassured him that people will like him for who he is and that giving stuff away could be tricky because other friends might then be hurt they didn't get something etc etc.

Tbh I waffled but I think there is a fine line b/w choosing to give stuff away and then being pressured to give more stuff and so on to extortion. We compromised by talking about having a treasure hunt on his next birthday (ages away but the idea of it cheered him up no end.

Dd is almost 8 and she does similar! She tends to give away her treasured moshi monsters to kids she wants to be her mates. I've banned anything from going into school now

I have told him it was a lovely idea and maybe we could do a 'raffle' at home if he wants. Thats the thing, he is pressured into giving things away, as the children who dont usually give him the time of day are interested in him for that moment iyswim. I might tell him that one of the school rules, is that you dont take things to school. He loves a rule!

Yes Chundle Moshi Monsters and pokemon cards are ds's obsession, even if he does only line them up

Thanks guys.

Dd1 doesn't line them up but during the day dd2 sneaks into her room and lines them up :)