Can you give me your honest opinions please.

[soicanfight]

If you saw a DC with the following,what would you think?

Speech delay ( by about 3yrs)
Communication problems.Doesn't like eye contact.
Around 3yrs behind his peers in school.
Doesn't like routines to change.Even something small like going to a different classroom.
Forgets where he needs go. i.e. going for lunch at school when to bell rings.
Has to turn all the lights on in the house before going upstairs,or to the downstairs toilet.
Obsessions.It used to be cars,for about 2 years.Now its lego.Doen't play with anything else.Even his clothes has to have lego on them.
Likes to play by himself.
Doesn't understand sarcasm.
I'm sure there's more,i just can't think atm.

TIA

It would depend on how old the dc is. If he was 5 with a delay of 3 years that would be more serious than 13 with the same delay and I would be very surprised if the dc was not in the SEN system by now.

But either way 3 years is a significant delay and I would be asking school for a meeting with the SENCo and going to GP for a referral for a developmental paediatrician.

From what you've posted it could be autism or more general learning difficulties but it definitely sounds like he needs more help and support than the average child and this forum is a great place to start.

It sounds like this child needs assessing by a developmental paed. You can get referred to one by your GP.

Also, is he on the SEN register at school?

Thank you latedeveloper.
DS is 7 in july.
He has an IEP+,but hasn't reached any targets for all most 2 years.
The educational psychologist came into school, 2 weeks ago to see DS.
Waiting for an appointment with him,to see what he thought.
Tried to make an appointment with GP,but there's nothing for the next 2 weeks.So i have to keep trying.

OK, so he has been seen by an EP, that means he is on School Action +

If he hasnt made any academic progress for that amount of time you could apply for SA (you do not have to wait for the school to do this) and use the SENCOP to back you up re "lack of adequate progress".

Assuming this is your child, there are obviously some things that are concerning you. Probably the first thing to do would be to ask your school or GP for a referral to a developmental paediatrician.

Nobody here can offer any type of diagnosis as we are not medical professionals. Most people here are simply going to tell you that you need to get him assessed further (which is actually good, as the last thing you need is someone armchair diagnosing your child, eh?).

There are many things on your list that my DS2 does, and he has a dx of ADHD/AS/DCD and sensory problems, however, it probably also ticks the boxes for a number of other things as well, as other posters will most likely tell you.

It can sometimes be difficult to get a referral. You just need to stand your ground and insist it's needed. Best of luck.

This forum is brilliant for advice and such, so please stick around.

I see now he's been seen by EP. Can the school refer him to paed? DS2 got his referral through the school nurse, as our previous GP (we've since changed GPs to one that is much better) refused to refer him to paed.

Is the school providing him with what support he needs?

Triggles thanks for you reply.
I know that Mners can't diagnose.I think i just needed somebody to tell me that they would to worry too,if this was their DS.
I have been trying to get help for DS for the last 2 years.GP's sent a referral to the wrong place and they refused to see DS.So i was begining to feel like i was making thing up.

Thanks for the info on school nurse.I didn't know they could refer DS.

The TA helps DS when she can,but she is there to help the whole class not just DS.
His teacher is waiting for feed back from EP.
I feel like i'm not doing enough to help DS.But i really don't know what else i can do.

Yep, our previous GP was an ass and would only refer to CAMHS, which was less than useless. CAMHS person then said "he needs to see a paed, why did the GP refer him to us??" By then we already had the referral to paed from school nurse. (But CAMHS person sent a letter to GP pointing out that DS2 should have been referred to paed, not them. ) I don't think GP was horribly clued up anyway - she said DS2 was "clearly not normal" and then said that ASD/ADHD were mental health problems, not medical problems, so he had to be referred to CAMHS. Not the sharpest tool in the box, that one.

As far as school is concerned, look at his individual needs. What support or assistance do you think he needs? What difficulties is he having? Jot it all down and meet with the senco to make sure they are covering everything. I'm a bit puzzled when you say he hasn't met any targets in his IEP for 2 years. Are you attending IEP reviews and giving input on the targets? You should be invited to all IEP reviews, and they should be listening to your input. Are the targets reasonable?

It was CAMHS that GP referred DS too.They sent me a letter refusing to see him at all.
I will keep trying to get an appointment at GP's.But they will only let you book upto 2 weeks and they are full.
I'm going to pop into school when i pick DS up, and find out when the nurse is there next.

DS has been on an IEP since pre-school.For the last 2 school years his targets have been the same.The only difference being the order they have been wrote down.
The school sent for me to sign the IEP and quickly go through it with me.To be honest i'm made to feel like i shouldn't even be in the school.
I have seen the SENco once since sept.
DS was seen by Learning surport last school year.Who did an assessment,which i was given a copy off.But i don't really know what difference this made for DS.
His teacher last year left half way through,and he had a cover teacher.DS was even more unhappy.From then everything that the school seemed to be trying to get DS (extra surport ect) seemed to slow down.
I feel like every time DS goes into a new class,we have to start all over again.

Sorry about spelling mistakes.I'm dyslexic so when i'm upset my spelling goes wrong.

Our school nurse spoke to me over the phone, after she spoke to the senco regarding the difficulties DS2 was having in school. She then put the referral through. Tell her you'd like to expedite this as you having been trying to get in to see the GP with no luck.

First of all, they should be telling you ahead of time when they are meeting to review the IEP, so that you can attend. If he has had the same targets for 2 years, and no progress is being made, they need to make some changes. You have every right to be involved in the process.

If you're not sure what different the learning support's report has made, then ask the senco.

I would schedule a meeting with the senco, explain to them that you are not happy with his progress and tell them you want to discuss what can be done differently in order to better meet your child's needs and support him properly. If you are uncomfortable meeting alone, then bring someone with you. Make it clear to them that you want more involvement in what's going on in school regarding your child.

Make notes, and send a letter after the meeting reiterating what was discussed and decided. And check back regularly with the senco regarding anything that crops up. I keep in contact with everyone through email mostly (senco, OT, paed, SALT, etc).

Ask the school to refer him to the Paediatrician if you have a 'non-clued-up' GP.

You sound great in that you keep trying to get help for your child despite the knockbacks.

Your gp and school sound like they are failing your child. You will need to push hard to get help.

triggles has given you some good advice.

Put things in writing (dont worry about spelling mistakes - most of the letters from school and the LEA have at least a couple (as do mine ).

Ask for a referral to the developmental or community paediatrician. Meanwhile you can self refer to a Speech and language therapist (find details on your councils website) there will be waiting list for both so best to get things rolling.

You say he is about 3 years behind in most areas - who told you this?

If you have the money you can get a private assessment by a developmental paed or speech therapist which would either get things going or even put your mind at rest. This is expensive though and i mention it reluctantly because it is not right that people should have to pay to access support.