Little bit of background - will try to be brief.
DD developed some health problems including a vision impairment towards end of school yr 6 - after she had passed 11+ to go to local girls grammar. She is accademic but not extremely so, and has always been quite sensitive and mature so we felt it was the right place when we applied.
We were concerned how she would cope with her new health issues, but I spoke to SENCO in the run up to year 7, she said several children had DD's condition, but that the sight problem was separate and counted as SEN so would put DD on their register.
DD has not been happy at school - struggled to 'fit in' due to feeling different, etc. Eye problem has worsened - Vision Support visitedher at school to assess her needs.
Long story short(er) - year 8 DD's attendance less than 50%, eyes much worse, huge anxiety about leaving home etc. Have had constant pressure from school and EWO for her to go in. SENCO has said to me on several occasions 'well she's fine when she's here' as if she doesn't believe there is a problem.
Just before Christmas finally got referall to CAMHS - first appointment was early this week. We havea diagnosis of Anxiety and Depression (councelling for one, meds for other). I got CAHMS agreement that DD cannot be expected to go to school til there are 'strategies in place' both to help with her vision and her anxieties. So asked for 'sick note' til end Easter Hols.
We have strategy meet at school next week. I have of course realised/been told by CAMHS and Parentlink that DD should have had written 'plan' in place from start of yr 7, which we should have reviewed regularly. This is I assume what is going to happen now?
We feel really let down by this school, and Education in general. If they had helped her sooner, put in place the support she needed and asked for,and believed that she had mental health issues beyond 'school refusal' perhaps we wouldn't have a 13 yEar old who has to sleep with her Mum, as she cannot be on her own upstairs because of the 'monsters' and because she has self harmed.
We are seriously considering Home schooling and hence my original question - if we are going to home school should we make the school get everything in place anyway (without telling them) because they should have done it 18 months ago anyway? Initial assessment CAMHS said would be better for DD to at least go to school temporarily rather than 'running away' - but we all just feel like running away at present:(
Sorry for long post - thanks for patience