Some advice re ds with potentially AS

[PeppaIsBack]

I know there are some very wise ladies on here and I was wondering if you could tell me what you think about ds. I have the impression that he might have AS but I am doubting myself so much that I haven't dare going and see the GP to talk about it yet.

So ds is 6yo, nearly 7yo.
He has:

• difficulty with spoken language. In a surprising way, he can use very complex words but seem to have some problem with the 'simpler ones'. Will talk at length of a few subjects (football, 'deadly sixty') but not of other subjects. Having him telling us what he has done at school for example, or at my parents during the hols, is just impossible. At home, he seems to be relying a lot on his older sibling and just copy what he is saying.
• is struggling to interact with other children. He is very much 'on the side'. He is talking now with them if they come over to him or will join in a game of football but otherwise, plays on his own a lot (I remember him playing for more than an hour in his room when he was 1.5yo for example). Now, he will have a child from his class saying hello and he won't answer or turn his head towards him.
• doesn't seem to be able to remember stories etc.. that he heard at school, even though they have spent a lot of time of them.
• imagining stories is very difficult (something that is very obvious in class) despite us reading lots of stories to him.
• When he was little (about 2yo), he wasn't engaging with people around him, incl the adults at the nursery. Now they were very hands on and spent a lot of time playing, doing stories etc.. but he would just ignore them and play with his cars (which at the time meant a great interest in how the wheels turned). This was flagged by the nursery at the time.

He has had no major issues health wise apart from some chronic constipation that is still going on.

I know that no one can give me a diagnosis like this but was wondering if you would see all that as potential issues linked with AS or I am going completely of track?

Hi, I don't know a lot about this but I have a similar threat about my younger DS who also has some worrying characteristics.

Many of those sound like AS traits, though it may be possible to have AS traits without full blown Aspergers, if that makes sense.

I have a friend who has a DD similar to how you describe, particularly the bit about not speaking to/ignoring peers when they say hello, particularly out of school. the word 'aspergers' has never been mentioned between us and as far as I know my friend is not persuing a diagnosis, but its generally known this girl is quite anxious/highly strung/difficult and my friend does quite a lot to try and help with her social skills. eg. they have strategic play dates etc. and this does seem to be helping.

hope that helps,

What does the school say?

Peppa,

The GP should refer your son to a developmental paediatrician. GP will not be able to diagnose but should point you to such a person like the dev paed. ALl this takes time, delaying it any won't help anyone least of all your son.

Are you seeing a specialist currently re the chronic constipation?. Any imput from a SALT (speech and language therapist)?.

I daresay that school have not said a great deal because your DS is probably quiet and compliant in class. Such children if they have additional support needs can be too easily overlooked in a classroom and are thus failed.

You are your child's best - and only - advocate here. No-one else is better placed than you to fight his corner for him; this is also because no-one else actually will.

Thank you all for your input.
The school knows there is an issue. They referred him to a SALT last year but nothing came out of it. In effect it's not bad enough for them to do something and he was improving thanks to the fantastic work of his teacher.
They would agree that there are other things going on (they pointed out his difficulty in imagining stories) but as far as they are concerned it's still within acceptable limits.
Any issue there is on a social level has been put down to his (lack) language skills.
I probably need to get a SALT privately to help with the communication side.

Re constipation, he was followed by a consultant but that didn't help at all so I took him to see a herbalist and it is working much better. At least there is no more soiling!

You're right about the fact he is quiet and not an issue. What his teachers say is that he is a pleasure to work with. Last year, his techer said she would be happy to have all the kids like him because he is able to get on with his work wo getting distracted by the other children playing next to him... And that he is very determined....

My main issue here is probably that, even if he gets a diagnostic of AS, it will be 'mild' so I am not sure if getting it will be of any benefit for him (ie support). And I suspect the diagnosis might be a bit of a trial for him. Does having a formal diagnosis really necessary compare to the stress of getting the referral, seeing the consultant etc..?

I will read the book. The more I know about it, the better. At least it will give me a clear idea of what is going on.

Hi Peppa - we are on another thread about our dh's.....and I have just posted this morning on the development/behaviour section about our ds's and his issues with school. maybe like you, I am just realising that As might have made it into another generation...? (This is 'firming up' my feeling that Dh has it...)

Like you, I suspect our DS might have 'mild' as, but it is enough to cause him great anxiety.

He has always had a long list of 'foibles' and 'idiosynchrasis' that I now wonder, is somehow connected.

We are noticing his behaviour now - he's 6, as it seems to be showing up as 'different' to how his peers are, they are developing at different rates.

We will hopefully see a school/ed psychologist soon to see where that takes us.

Keep posting - we sound like we are at the same stages.

Yep this is posting about DH and looking at him that made me wonder about ds...

In a strange way, some social issues were much more obvious with ds when he was little than now (The not talking/connecting with people for example).

How did you ask about seeing the school/ed psychologist?

we didn't ask, the depute head suggested it, ( I was crying on the phone to her saying how I couldn't get him to get ready, all to do with how unhappy he is at school) because ds has now had a few meltdowns about going to school. Have to say they were very supportive for him ,straight away.