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Original poster

New here and alone????

16 replies

nickster1978 · 26/02/2012 18:24

Hi all

I am new on here and feel so desperately alone in my situation. My son is 10 and has been at his present school since Sept 2010 he is a high functioning autistic.

Recently had a big blow at school where head tried to physically stop me leaving her office. ( I am pregnant and also had my 15 month old in my arms). When I left her office I found my son, locked in a room unsupervised.

I complained to the Chair of Govenors (also the leader of our council). We had a meeting where he stated he didn't agree with my complaints and didn't really address them. He threatened exclusion a number of times. Said if we weren't happy with school to go elsewhere and basically said that if we didn't become human doormats to school and allow them to talk/treat us how they wanted to bugger off.

I think if that's the opinion of the leader of the local council where do I go from here. I have requested assessment for statementing and the deadline for reply is Tuesday.

OP posts:
WetAugust · 26/02/2012 19:11

Difficult one.

You could complain to the Director of Education at the LA, but as the Council Leader is the Chair of Governors I doubt the LA would upset him.

Definitely move schools if you can.

Do you have any witnesses to this behaviour or anything in writing that states that he was left in a locked room?

You are definitely doing the right thing in asking for a statutory assessment.

Have you spoken to IPSEA www.ipsea.org.uk ?

Original poster
nickster1978 · 26/02/2012 19:17

Hi,

I have spoke to ipsea who advised to continue on statementing route. I would like to leave the school but ipsea advised to get the statement first?
Unfortunately I don't have any witnesses or anything that confirms he was left alone in locked in a room. I know that staff within the school have observed these things but would definately not give me their support.

OP posts:
Ineedalife · 26/02/2012 19:37

Hi nickster and welcome to the board.

What an awful situation for you and your Ds to be inSad.

You have come to the right place, there are loads of knowledgable people around on here.

Be kind to yourself and good luck.Smile

Original poster
nickster1978 · 26/02/2012 19:46

Thanks Ineedalife,

I just dont think I can face going there day in day out. I am a nervous wreck. I know I need to do whats good for DS but I really am struggling.

OP posts:
AgnesDiPesto · 26/02/2012 19:49

Try the Childrens Legal Centre for free first interview / initial advice.

HolyCalamityJane · 26/02/2012 20:33

I would report the matter to the police and remove him from the school immediately reporting the matter to your education board. That is also the advice of Dh who is solicitor!

coff33pot · 26/02/2012 20:54

Hi and welcome :)

Did they give you a reason for locking him in a classroom unsupervised??

I would start to keep a diary of events for a start if you intend to keep him there whilst applying for a statement. But to be honest should he get a statement do you think this school would actually follow it to the letter?

Get as much of a paper trail as you can by way of emails to the school in anything you are unhappy about or need confirming that way you have a log of events. ALWAYS take someone with you to any meeting that is impartial as a witness and a second pair of ears always helps.

If there are exclusions then you by rights should be given a letter stating why and for how long. Keep them and add them to your statement portfolio to show that he cannot cope without a statement of needs x

I dont know if I could stick it out though I would want to take my son out and move him to a more understanding school.

WetAugust · 26/02/2012 21:12

I know that staff within the school have observed these things but would definately not give me their support.

They may feel differently if they were questioned by the Police.

I agree with HCJ. I'd involve the Police. And I wouldn't wait until the Statementing process was complete. I'd remove him
immediately and state why, if I was asked.

oodlesofdoodles · 26/02/2012 21:22

Good advice from OPs above. School sounds dickensian. What had he done to get locked in a cupboard?

Do you read Private Eye? The In the Back team might offer you some advice. They often take up and campaign on these sorts of stories.

bochead · 26/02/2012 21:41

Your post sent shivers down my spine - spookily similar until it got worse. I didn't go to the police and will regret it for the rest of my life. Please don't make my mistake.

Original poster
nickster1978 · 27/02/2012 12:45

Thanks for all your advice. I am really grateful. I'm trying to find another school as we speak but I'm struggling to find one to accomodate both my DS and my DD who is 6. I sent in a subject access request and the deadline is Friday so hopefully this will help with the paper trail. It all seems so corrupt and my DS dreads going every morning. I don't feel confident enough going to the police 6 weeks after the incident to be honest.

OP posts:
coff33pot · 27/02/2012 12:59

why? to me it smells of abuse if they lock him in a classroom unattended. Social Services would have a field day with you if you did it at home.......

I really would go to the police about it. 6 weeks isnt that long and you can say you have tried to get to the bottom of it yourself but are having doors slammed in you face and now your DS anxiety is building up too much about going.

Triggles · 27/02/2012 13:33

The police are used to people reporting after the fact (I worked for the police department for years). It happens all the time. Reporting it means you have another paper trail, and that's a good thing. It also signals loud and clear to the school that they need to tread carefully as you will not be treated inappropriately - that's also important.

WetAugust · 27/02/2012 16:47

Another one who also agrees with going to the Police. 6 weeks after the event is nothing. The Police investigate abuse 6 years after the event!

You need to send a clear message to the school that this type of behviour is outrageous and you're not scared to report it.

Best wishes

SparkleRainbow · 27/02/2012 16:58

I would contact the LA officer in charge of safeguarding, the LA will take on the Chair of Governors in my expereince, and the Head, who deserves a serious and formal LA investigation for this. Teaching unions will support their teachers, but in a case like this they will also say teachers must tell the truth about what they have seen or suspect. I would remove my child instantly, and write a letter to the CXO of local authoirty copied to OFSTED and your MP, they will asnwer your questions very very quickly.

I say this having finally won a fight with my LA, got a new ms placement for my sn child, and have had the LA accomodate my dd1 at the same school, and got ,loads more support in place as a result. It was a hard fight, and I had to fight hard, even staged a sit in at the LA council offices and threatened them with press
, as well as legal action. I am also a teacher, and my mum is an ed psyc.

SparkleRainbow · 27/02/2012 16:58

PS, you may be new here, but you are never alone.

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