Working Mom & Reality

[WasUnderThirthy]

My asd dd will start school next fall, and I had always thought that by that point I would be ready to focus back on work, and maybe aim for that more demanding/rewarding position. I am starting to realise that even if school will mean less appointments, the demand of living with a child on the spectrum will not diminish.

I mean, really, is it more easy? Because I am thinking homeworks, worrying about school life, always trying to achieve new goals, etc.

Sorry I am a bit depressed because I am thinking of refusing an assignement at work that would make me work more, and longer hours, because I feel that there is enough stress in my life that I want my job to stay easy, and I want to keep my energy for my dd. Does that make sense?

I have been struggeling with this ever since I had children, so don't take my advice. I am currently thinking that I am a much better mother (even if I have less time) if I am content with my job and I have to put in a certain number of hours/effort so that I am content with my job. If the assignment is something you'd like to do, I would consider it. But then this is such a personal choice..

Accepting work isn't a lifetime commitment. You can always work 'for now' and re-evaluate. Especially in this climate when haphazard cvs are standard.

I understand where you are coming from. But I would go for it. Its good for the soul to have something for yourself and achieve in it despite the odds :)

Yes it steps up the pressure of homelife but the way I look at it is I go to work for a rest! Its busy as hell but I am not split into various pieces running around like I do at home. I work for myself and it is very hard but I have learnt to treat my work as my "time out" and so dont look for any time to myself when I get home as I have been lucky to have it during the day :) We have to be more organised than most and stick to a time schedule for most things but it can work.

Life is too short for "what ifs" or "I wish I did" so I am a big believer in jumping in with both feet. If the water is too deep you can always jump out again :)

It's true that for me Mondays always equal rest...try explaining that to fellow co-workers!

I must add that I came back to work after mat leave, so I find it hard managing work, and appointments / ABA etc.

Thank for letting me vent, and your advices :)

I think you have to do what is best for you. It never hurts to try, IMO.

I stopped work a few years ago, and although DH & I have discussed the possibility of me going back to work, realistically it most likely isn't going to happen. The work I am best qualified for, which would pay well, involves a full time commitment to do the job properly as well as shiftwork. FT and shiftwork are both out of the question for our particular family schedule, so there's no point in me working just to pay for part time childcare (even if we could find reliable safe childcare for DS2).

I think you have to take into account your strengths (and weaknesses) as well as what your child will need from you, and go from there. I think for some it works well, for others (like me) it doesn't. It's all up to the individual situation.