Top toileting tips for ten yr old please

[ohmeohmy]

Having lots of toileting problems, concerned that secondary school looming and it is not sorted well enough.

1. Sensory processing problems mean doesn't realise needs a wee till late and gets distracted when doing it, poor fine motor skills means difficulty getting pants down far enough not to wee on them. Result, wee missing toilet, often on floor sometimes on clothes, sometimes not making it in time at all. But kind of manages himself.

1. Tendency towards constipation with lots of small accidents. Have started movicol but only on 1 sachet and doesn't seem to be regulating enough. Often too into his DVDs or books to want to go to bathroom. Lots of resistance when it is suggested. Will sit on the loo with a book when made to for ages but often not doing anything. Can't wipe his bum. Still needs pull ups at night. Often wet in morning but think this is partly because he doesn't go when he gets up. Often will soil them with small amounts of poo but today it was quite a lot. Don't know if he just didn't notice or just didn't care.

Basically, in pants during day with some toileting success but quite a lot of accidents. In pull ups at night. Getting very upset over my efforts to get him sorted, feels criticised. :( Says he would like to be out of pull ups but doesn't remember (poor working memory).

Anyway this is really exasperating and I am worried that at his age he really needs this sorted but don't know how to handle it any differently. Tips greatly appreciated. Will come back to thread later in the day.

Hi ohmeohmy My son has toileting issues too, he is 8. He is more or less out of pull ups at night with rare accidents these days - but only when we remember to get him to do a wee before bedtime (which is 99% of the time)
He still soils regularly and will only 'perform' on the toilet when he has already had an accident (mostly minor but some of significant size). He suffered acute consitpation when he was 3-4 years old and has never really recovered. I am going to a soiling workshop with the ASD team in iour Health Trust on monday and will gladly share any information/help I get. Until them - hugs - I know what it is like :(

Thanks Lisani, I will be really interested to hear what you learn. Just had another BIG accident. He seemed oblivious to it. He is now on the loo with a book, again.

You need to make sure he is drinking 8 glasses of water a day and ask the school he is at now to make sure that after his lunch they sit him on the toilet. Theres a few social stories out there: www.scribd.com/doc/28743654/Poo-Goes-to-Pooland-1-1 for example which maybe of use. Also talk to him about a reward at the end of the week for 1 day without pooey pants and build on that. He chooses a small reward.

Thanks, will take a look at that link

My DS is 7 and still in pull ups, I find it so disheartening. Especially after some idiot a couple of weeks ago actually asked me "well have you tried toilet training him?" Of course I bloody well have! I've tried everything.

Mine's only issue is bowel movements, weeing is not an issue. He soils throughout the day though and even during the night sometimes as he withholds it and I think then when he relaxes in his sleep it comes out. He's on movicol for constipation.

I've tried all sorts and don't seem to get anywhere.

Well, actually that's not true as he would never sit on the toilet before whereas he would now.

Tried him with freshly squeezed orange juice and he then refused to drink any form of juice for 6 months. When he got put on movicol he for some reason refused milk as a drink (no idea why, we never put the movicol in it). Currently he will only drink squash/cordial, and only tiny sips of water at the bank or at school.

I feel so despondent about it all.

Know how you feel. I am currently trying out wassups suggestion of the sneaky poo. Fingers crossed. Already though it has taken some of the angst out of it as it is us together against sneaky poo rather than me against him.

Is it possible that the constipation is sometimes causing the wee accidents? This has definitely been the case for ds. I am guessing that you may have to up the dose of movicol.