Morning.
Really sorry, I'm posting a lot recently, but I really don't know who else to talk to who understands.
I've had some great advice recently about how I can help my dd with her behaviour/social skills and i'm definitely going to take it on board. Currently though, I just feel so angry, bitter, exhausted, confused, panicky and just plain sad.
When I dropped her off at school this morning she was so bouncy and talking complete nonsense. Some of the dc's were laughing at her. She thinks that that means they like her, but I know they make fun of her because i've seen and heard it, which I will be mentioning at parents evening tomorrow. I know however, that i'll get the usual
look from the teacher who never seems to think that there's a problem!!
Last night was a nightmare. She was screaming like a wild animal and kept laughing at my frustration and anger. She does have empathy so this is out of character. When she's like this, she is completely defiant, rude, has really bad communication skills, constantly talks randomly and out of context and will not stop spinning. The last week or so, she does this thing where she will run backwards and forwards in the living room for about an hour. Usually shouting "look at me everybody!!"
I feel like my head is going to explode. I'm on the edge of tears all the time. This moring I completely avoided eye contact with any of the other parents because I was so upset by her behaviour. I knew if anyone spoke to me i'd probably break down.
I don't really know why i'm posting. I'm just completely lost..........again. I'm feeling like such a bad mum because I get angry and embarassed. I know I shouldn't feel like this. She is my dd and of course I love her unconditionally, but this feeling of resentment is becoming overwhelming. Not with dd, but with the situation.