SHOUTING OUT IN CLASS!!!

[mrsforgetful]

DS2 came home with an official 'step 1' of 3 steps to expulsion letter today for shouting out 'FISHFINGER' and 'PLAYSTATION' in class.... Why i do not know (he's not keen on fishfingers...guess what i've decided he can have for tea!)
I'm finding it too hard at the mo as I feel this is just another example of ASD etc- but the school still expect me to 'discipline' him- which i ofcourse will in the ASD way.... he gets told at school he's being silly- AM I MISSING SOMETHING HERE.....DO ANY OF YOURS ASD'S SHOUT OUT THESE 'ODD' WORDS...ds1 TENDS TO MAKE INAPPROPRIATE COMMENTS...IE IF HE SEES SOMEONE KICKING A FENCE HE WILL SAY'THATS CRIMINAL- HE SHOULD NOT DO THAT' ETC (OR WORDS TO THAT EFFECT)
And 'if' i am right.... then it's not 'OK' for ds2 to just 'do' these things -i know that- but how do i 'handle the teachers' when for example she sees his echolalia as 'mimmicking'- and when he 'froze' to the spot because the lunchbox trolley had gone to the hall and usually he put his box on it before taking his coat off etc...this time he was unable to 'move on' because 'something ' was 'wrong'...the teacher saw this as 'being silly'
Come on...Honesty please- from you NT parents too!!! How do i handle this?

Oh, poor you and poor ds. Is there any mention of this in his statement and IEP? Is his teacher aware that this is part of his 'profile'?

As a teacher, I also sympathise with the teacher, as a simple incident can snowball, and classes can get out of control. Please understand that I do not think that your son is at fault over this.

I know of ASD/ADHD children who are given laminated cards to help them to remember not to shout out etc. In some cases they can be very helpful. Your son's teacher could gently remind him of the card, and put it on his deak at the start of the day. Then use positive behaviour management as the day goes on (Marbles in a jar for each 5 mins without shouting etc?. A TA would also help him. if the teacher has one.

Have a quiet chat with the teacher, voicing your worries, and see if you can rough out a plan of action (with sensible targets)

I hope things improve.

Will the school EVER listen to you, mrsf? I don't know if shouting out is typical of AS but ds1 does call out words for no apparent reason. It seems to be a compulsive kind of thing where he feels the need to say a word that he likes the sound of.

yep- ds1 shouts stuff out. Today he was shouting "gagee" (doggy) everytime the Cbeebies sign swung round to the paw print during teletubbies. This was about every 5 seconds so it got a bit tedious.

Is there an autism outreach team near you- could they go in to help the school? I've just got back from a meeting with everyone at the school and they were saying how helpful the autism outeach team were - and how the level of support they had made such a difference to them, and also that it was completely unprecedented. I know our team have a very good understanding of autism and are incredibly good. Schools are more inclined to listen to them.

can I tell you that I teach nt children who are in year 9 ( third years) who shout out ridiculous things in class...... obviously I would deal with it in an entirely different way to a child I know ( through his IEP) needs to be dealt with in a different way...

Not sure about the teacher - is it possible for you to do a list of behaviours and explanations ( in simple language ) for her to refer to if she is unsure of what is going on?? You may have already done this via his IEP.. OR thr SENCO could do this...

sorry I can't be more helpful........

Sounds like the teacher needs a laminated card Seriously though would a checklist of potential triggers be useful. Also maybe show her something 'authoratitive' which explains why AS children do these things. Is there a 3rd party you could appeal to if it is getting as bad as the expulsion stage? sorry don't know much about schools ... as I said before try to get her to see it from your son's point of view - what does he gain from saying these words, they are obviously a compulsion. He's not involving anyone else, he's not making fun of anyone or hte teacher, and the words are totally out of context - it is just not like 'normal' misbehaving.

My ds will say what he thinks if he thinks someone is doing something wrong and is forever telling people off (both adults and children) and of course "shut up" to me although it seems to be "stop doing that" now thankfully.

Well...... after writing this post i left a message with DS1's Paed to call me ref DS2's probs. She called at 5.30.....and i've been walking on air since! Basically to recap- DS2 was observed at school following my request -and the paed said he was showing AS but not enough for a DX- . Then last week i HAD to take DS2 and 3 with DS1 to see her for his routine check - DS2 did EVERYTHING possible to illustrate his Autism! (though of course he had no idea of his Oscar winning performance!...another nominee for The Movie Coppertop !!)
Now i've been waiting patiently for either a phone call or a letter ref her 'witnessing all this'- but after 'today's' incident i decided to call her.
Basically i asked her directly if she had observed anything the other day which may mean she'd be happy to 'look into this sooner rather than later'....she actually said that she had and was writing to us and the school head (who is the senco too... ) to arrange a formal assessment!!!!!! HOO-BL**DY-HOORAY!!!!!!
And do you know what makes me even happier than that (!!) is that when i read the replies to my thread it was as if he already had the diagnosis....I'm always saying that WE would make better Paediatricians!!!

HMB- I love that idea about the laminate card- I am seeing the SENCO (also the head ...get my point....don't think its good that a senco is also the head!)so will try and get one ready to take with me. However how receptive this teacher will be is debatable....i asked her to stamp a smiley face daily in a little book i bought to indicate if he had a 'good' day etc...she said 'it wasn't necassary!
Still half the battle's won now i have the paed on my side!!!

Awful teacher! "Not necessary" to let you know even at the simplest level if he's had a good day or not. How about doing it because you'd LIKE her to? I'm sure the SEN guidelines talk a lot about parental involvement and it would just be good practice, this is DS1's teacher who won't countenance a home/school book isn't it? Give her a big, laminated RED card

Yes to the red card! That's such good news, mrsf. How about a 'western' scene where the Paed rides into school, armed with a 6-red-cards-shooter and 'fires' them at the teacher and Head?

Yep, my ds1 does the shouting out thing all the time. Thank goodness someone has listened to you at last, Mrs F - hope things improve at school soon. The teacher might be embarrassed now?
I never try and discipline ds1 for what has gone on at school - if I haven't been there, how do I know exactly what went on? I need him to know I believe in him, and he is usually pretty truthful and accurate.

MARYZ and JMB1964- had pretty much that conversation with school today- in that i explained that HE HAS NO IDEA WHAT THEY MEAN BY ' BEING SILLY' - as he sees it. I asked again for specifics about behaviour issues- otherwise I JUST DON@T WANT TO KNOW!!! Anyhow HE drew a lovely picture today before school of himself....very rare he draws people.... i then said could he draw me too ....he did - and guess what he drew us holding hands!!!! This is just what i needed to remind and convince me that he knows i love him- and that I'm by his side!!!! Thanks for all the replies to this post- i was very low when i started it and all your comments really help!!!