I think I may just self-combust... school placement issues

[Triggles]

I've posted recently that we decided on a very nice SS locally for DS2 to attend. The SS seemed good with it, the MS seemed good with it. Everyone seemed happy. Then the senco says that because DS2 is academically ahead, we might have difficulty getting him into the SS. We've now been told that it's not us that decides where he goes to school, but the LA. But that we can appeal if we don't like where they place him.

So what we thought was on the way to settled is now completely up in the air again. I have to go look at another SS in the area (that we're not keen on anyway) in case the LA recommends that one, and I have DH stomping about the house saying "Fine! We'll HS then!!" Um, sure... except we all know who will be completely and utterly responsible for that - ME!!!

sigh... I HATE this system. I just want to be able to just put him in a school that is a good fit for him. Why does it have to be so aggravating!?!??!!

which SENCO said that? MS or SS?

MS. We'd just like to sort it out and have it settled. We can't even discuss it fully until his annual review next month, then wait to see what the LA decides. I'm fuming right now.

Do go and see the other school, appear totally reasonable and then when you come home make a clear list of reasons why it isn't suitable.

At the annual review you need to show why the current school isn't meeting his needs and why the special school will be appropriate. Parental choice does count as well.

Good luck

you definitely get to express a preference when it comes to schools. I found this quite useful in it's old format when we were looking for schools for dd3 as it gives an idea of the cost of the place there. And it's definitely worth looking at all the schools and keeping a list of how they will be unable to meet his needs should you need it, transport costs may also play a part in the decision.

it is most aggravating but you have time before the annual review to build your case on why this is the only school that will meet ds' needs.

I'm also a bit irritated as the senco said to put in the parents view sheet where we wanted him to go and why, so we did, and now it just seems a bit awkward and ahead of itself.

I'm also a bit baffled over the "he's too far ahead academically and might not get in there" comment. He is ahead in reading and got a G&T letter re his maths, so doing well there. But his comprehension, sequencing, and prediction skills are just not there at all, and will really be affecting his maths and reading over the next year or so (and from then on!). We're really concerned that staying in the current atmosphere will mean his maths and reading will drop dramatically when he begins struggling. And he's already struggling in some areas now. He's very much a "memorise facts, but reasoning is out the window" type.

Socially he's WELL behind the other children his age at school. He's taken out of classroom lessons regularly because he cannot cope with it. He has a separate desk in one corner of the room which they use when he is upset, distress, overexcited, etc. They use it daily, but lately he's had to be taken literally out of the room elsewhere before he could calm down and refocus. He can't participate in any afterschool clubs or activities, as the 1:1 doesn't cover that, and there are concerns for his safety due to impulsive behaviour and vulnerability due to comprehension, among other reasons. He's just so separated so frequently in MS, we feel it's overkill. We'd rather he be in the SS and be able to interact on a more regular level with his peers, if that makes sense.

The SENCO may well be unfamiliar with SS. Try not to worry too much about that comment, although it was probably well intentioned.

Do go to see the other option. You can't rule it out until you've seen it, it may surprise you. And if not, you need the ammunition as to why it's not suitable. If they are saying it may be more appropriate due to your DS's ability they may have a point. Again, look at the peer group and see if your DS would fit in with them. If the peer group is tiny and very different from your DS that's more ammunition.

What's the general consensus here when people are looking at schools?

DS2 is currently high academically, but who knows how long he will remain that way as the curriculum relies more on skills and less on memorisation of knowledge as he gets older. I know that the school we would like him to go to does not have a lot of higher academic children, however, from a SN standpoint, they tick all the boxes. The ones with the higher academic children also do a lot of work within MS schools, so the children are part MS, part SS to some extent. And the whole reason we want to move him to SS is because he has difficulty coping with the larger class sizes and sensory overload of MS classes. I don't want to hold him back academically or have him not get the academic push he needs, but neither do I want every day to be a complete struggle while he tries to hold it together in a stressful classroom for him either.

argh...

Triggles, not wanting to give too much info, what sort of school are they recommending, a unit attached to a MS school or a different SS. That may help people to answer you better.

They're being rather odd about it actually. They initially said they think the SS is good and he'd do well there. Then suddenly a week later (today) it was mentioned about a unit attached to a MS school. Then kind of thrown up in the air as "it's up to the LA" and "his academics are quite high which might make it difficult for him to go into SS." Even though I asked specifically about that last week and was told by same person that his academics being high wasn't going to be an issue.

Legally the school has to be suitable for his and ability.

So if he is a lot more able than the children in SS it would not be a suitable placement.

A base attached to a mainstream school would probably give him the best of both worlds - a sheltered environment with access to mainstream teaching.

By the way Bases/Units attached to MS schools are themselves MS.

is it the ms senco that is saying all this? If it is I doubt she's aware of all the ins and outs, have you spoken to the case worker at the lea, they're really the one to give you the proper information, you don't have to wait for the annual review if you wanted to have a chat? Are they likely to want to amend any of the rest of the statement, it could be they want to do that if changing to ss or a base? Do you have an up to date ep report?

I know this sounds very harsh but do be very wary of trusting the 'professionals' here. A SS placement always costs more than any type of MS. You know your child best and ONLY you will have his best interest at heart. The legal position of any LEA is to find an appropriate placement not the best one. Only we as parents can do that.

Yes, I do understand that part of it. But the school just seems to point us in one direction saying "this is a good option", then when we say "Okay yes that's good" they then point us in another direction and say "no, perhaps not, do this instead."

He's academically able for his current age. How that will change over the next year or so due to his comprehension issues and lack of skills in sequencing and reasoning, is anyone's guess, although I would imagine it's going to cause increasing difficulties as it's already starting to crop up. He already doesn't do 95% of the homework sent home as he either doesn't understand it, we've tried to explain and he still doesn't get it, and we've requested they work through it with him at school and it still doesn't get done.

And MS classrooms are one of the things he is finding it most difficult to cope with. I'm struggling to see where access to MS classes is a good thing for him, when it's something that tends to push him over the edge.

In a Base he would be in a small class. He would get ASD-specific teachig to help him understand the condition and would be proactively taught social and communication skills via things like social stories.

He would be protected from the more boisterous element of MS children and would probably adopt the buddy system where he is twinned with another Base pupil so they look out for each other.

He would also have the opportunity to take academic and vocational qualifications. Very few SS cater for the academically able.

To be fair, we really wanted to keep him in MS as long as possible, but that was when he was in reception that we decided that. Honestly, there just isn't that much going on socially in reception, other than some random birthday parties. In Year 1, they've had afterschool clubs and different activities, none of which DS2 has been able to participate in. We're watching the social gap grow more and more and it really worries us.

I understand them saying "oh, well with a 1:1 he can access these classes" but he would literally need someone with him at all times, due to various aspects of his needs. He spends so much time separated from the main group of students, I find it difficult to believe he's receiving much of a "MS classroom" benefit, IYSWIM.

it depends on the base and how they work, some bases integrate the children more than others so if there's any you can go to look at, add them to the list.

I think that the school have been told not to point you in the direction one particular school by the LEA even if they hold the opinion it may be right for him. By the way, how old is your son?

WetAugust I'd never be happy with DS2 and another child looking out for each other. He can't even look out for himself, much less another child. His current school has agreed that he MUST have FT 1:1 in a MS setting due to his particular needs and behaviours. But I see what you are saying. DH & I simply don't feel that it's a very good option. I'll still go see the school and discuss it with them. We've definitely decided against the MS jr school attached to the infant school - the few things they mentioned they could do as measures to keep him safe would practically segregate him from all but about 5 of the entire population of the school, which I find ridiculous. Not to mention a few things that sounded more like a punishment for him than an adaptation to assist him.

It's just a dilemma right now. I obviously need to see this other school now. It's annoying as our parents view has just been sent out in the annual review packet to those that will be attending by senco, with us highlighting why we want him to go to SS, when the MS is now saying they're not sure it's a good fit (complete change from last week).

I can keep an open mind. But I can still be annoyed too. I'm a multitasker.

And thank the dear lord, DH is off buying a bottle of wine right now. I need it.

vjg13 - he's 5yo and in yr1. They've (his current MS) been suggesting SS "off the record" since practically the beginning of reception.

but then again, they've been suggesting we medicate him for the past year as well (again "off the record")

As more food for thought, the special unit you are talking about only goes up to the end of primary school. There are no special units in our area for communication and interaction in secondary. One of the local secondary schools is very good with DC with ASD, it happens to be the one next door to the original SS you have been looking at. It has a very good SN department, I was very impressed. (My DS would have gone there if his DB wasn't already at another secondary with an almost as good SN dept, 2 close friends DC go there and are very happy, they both have over 20 hrs on their statements due to some challenging behaviour as well as ASD.) So your DS will either end up in that secondary or in the SS next door with access to that secondary, as they have a close working relationship. I know it seems far away at the moment, but worth looking at the long term as well.

EstellaJane Thanks. Yes, I had considered secondary as well and did note that the unit does not go into secondary school. I hadn't realised there were literally NO special units in our area for secondary though. Thanks for that, as I will add that to our list of reasons for DS2 to go to original SS, for ease of transition.