Why isn't ds making progress? WWYD?

[latedeveloper]

Ds age six has a dx of gdd and will quite likely get a dx of asd (if we ever get to the top of that assessment waiting list). He functions around 3- 3.5 years in terms of cognition, social skills and speech. His motor skills and receptive language skills are lower than that- between 18 -2 yrs I suspect.

He got to the age of 3 without anyone being particularly worried. I got the usual fobbing off of any concerns i raised about speech and motor skills

he has a great sense of fun and is very sociable. He loves stories and has a vocabulary that is at least age appropriate even though he struggles to express his ideas. He can play long games with his 3 year old sister -pretending to go camping, or pretending to be pirates searching for treasure.

He is great at recognising different animals, plants, dinosaurs etc and for example was able to remember the name of the magician at a show we saw over a year ago and which i had forgotten. he struggles to express his ideas but talks a lot and we have had a few "why" questions.

At school (MS) he has a statement with specifies 4 hours a day 1 to 1 or small group, OT, speech therapy and social skills. But his progress has been really slow. He is repeating the reception year and has come along socially in terms of interaction but is unable to form any letters or draw anything recognisable. he is operating between levels 1-3 on the early years framework with the odd 4 for creativity and emotional literacy (for those of whom this means anything!)

He can recognise some letters and most numbers but find sequencing difficult.

He is on valporate for absence seizures and iron suplement for anaemia.

School are saying they don't think they can meet his needs next year and are suggesting we look for a provision or SS. I am looking at alternative but I guess my problem is this:

Will he make more progress somewhere else? Does that justify the upheaval and losing his friendships? - there is a little group of us that meet up after school with our kids to play quite often.

Any thoughts welcome to help me make sense of this -lots of personal detail here so please don't out me anyone

we saw a unit that worked a similar way to what vjg describes - dd1 would have been fine in the unit, but from day one, inclusion in mainstream was pushed. not when the child was ready, or when it would be appropriate, but just 'oh yes, we get that going as soon as possible, and increase in regular stages'

no suggestion of waiting unitl dd1 could cope, no checkin gthe lessons she was going into were appropriate.

it was bizarre, because otherwise the unit was very good. but it seemed ot run to suit the staff levels, rather than to suit the children who attended.

thanks for coming back to explain that point. in both units i like they say the amount of time a child spends in mainstream varies depending on the child.

Silverfrog will look out at neighbouring schools but not found much so far.

S

i would echo what the others have said re visiting the schools to see where best fits.
ds2 started off with a split placement & settled well in both.
he is now at ft ms with 1to1, he does learn very very slowly & make progress, slowly. Is at reception (ish) stage but in yr 4.
IME the academic adjustments are the easiest to make.

DS2 is doing great at his primary because - it is a very smal primary, just 17 in his class, he has a fullt time 1 to 1, they work closely with the ot, physio, psych etc.
They also couldnt give a t*ss about league tables, its more about individualised learning for all the kids.
Because of this ds2 can cope with the social & sensory demands.
DS2 is also extrmely quiet, placid & only ever does exactly as he is told, nothing more, nothing less. He has very lttle ability for indipendant thinking.

if he were a child with more behavioural difficulties that may be seen as disruptive then i could see the school finding it more difficult to cope & visa versa.

Make sure they quantify exactly how they cant meet his needs.
Is their decision based on what is best for your ds or for the school?

That said if the decision is not based on your ds's needs do you want him to go there anyway?