V. proud mummy moment / breakthrough with my parents! :0)

[proudmum74]

Hi,

Apologies in advance, as this is an unashamedly proud mummy moment!

A bit of background first - my parents, especially my mum, have never been able to accept the fact that dd has Down's. In fairness to them, they love DD, but they have always assumed she had no real future, probably due to the fact that growing up our neighbour's DS had down's and did have severe learning challenges, so they have seen the worse case scenario. It's also not helped by the fact that all their other darling GC are seriously academically gifted, darling niece 1 is top of her district at both english & maths!! so even without her condition, there was a high chance DD might be a disappointment to them...

Over Christmas we hit a low note, when my mum admitted that when she "heard DD had Down's she thought it was the worst possible news ever, but she's been encouraged recently as it doesn't look like DD will be completely retarded after all"

Anyway after I got over the shock, I decided that my parents needed to spend more time with DD, as she's an absolute cutie and can charm anyone! So they've been to stay for the past few days, whilst dh has been away with work, & dd was an absolute star!! not only was she her usual amazing self; waving , blowing kisses, exploring everything but she also chose this week to make a major breakthrough on her IEP! I've been working for the past 2 months on trying to improve her word recognition skills, trying to get her to correctly identify 4 out of 5 items when I sign the object. Normally she either looks like she hasn't got a clue what I'm talking about or just laughs and goes off and plays with something else, but today (when my parents were watching) she not only sat still, but she correctly selected all 5 (yes 5!!!) items. And it wasn't just luck, as she had to turn round to pick up 3 of the 5 items. I am so, so proud of her!!

My parents were stunned and have spent the rest of the day saying how incredibly bright she is & what a complete superstar!! I think they've finally managed to see my beautiful dd rather than just her disability!

well done to your dd and hopefully a breakthough with gps too

Thank you!

Well done on DDs achievement clever girl! :)

I am hoping her grandparents learn to value her for the beautiful girl she is from now on xxx

Sounds fantastic. My own Mum (though she has ex secondary senco background) could be considered DS's most effective therapist. Seriously she's been an amazng help as she's not as close to DS as me so can implement some strategies more objectively. Ds also worships her so tries really hard for her at stuff he finds hard.

Any chance you could cannily manouvere your parents to play a similar role? In the right circumstances extended family can be the best educators for children. It's also so cool when you can whoop together with joy at acheivements, their difference to the standard "a" for maths makes them all the more special in the right company. Teachers haven't known the chid from newborn and seen all the lows behind closed doors like family have.

Thanks everyone!

Good advice bochead!

I'm lucky that I have great support from DH parents, my MIL (whilst a nightmare in other areas) is amazing when it comes to DD. She was a primary school SENCO, so has such a positive attitude - you never know my parents may get there too one day!... I have far more hope now, then I did a week ago!

well done little proudlet! and well done proud!

That's fabulous. These developmental leaps are often a bit of a surprise, I find. It took me a while to appreciate my DS2 (ASD) for the amazing character he is, and to stop grieving for the child I thought I was going to have, so it's probably even harder for GPs who are one step removed. Your DD is a unique person with her own personality and character, but it takes some people a while to see beyond the label or DX.