DS 4 Y.O has just been diagnosed with Autism, what now?

[Londonlass23]

Hello everyone,

DS1 4 years and 2 months has just been diagnosed with ASD and I am still in a bit of shock. DH wants to get a second opinion, is this advisable and what are our options? Also if anyone could point me towards support groups / organisations please list them.

I just generally need a bit of advice as to what to do next, thanks.

Hi Londonlass. Do you think the DX is wrong? It's really common to go through a period of denial, but it's rare to get an incorrect DX, more common for the professionals to be reluctant to DX if they aren't sure. Sorry if that's not what you want to hear. Even when you are expecting a DX it is still really hard to have that last hope that everyone is wrong extinguished.

I'd take a bit of time to get your head around the DX and be kind to yourselves. It hasn't changed your DS, he's still the same lovely boy. Hopefully the DX will mean it will be easier to get him and yourselves some support. Who has DXed him? Can you ask them about Earlybird which is a parenting course for young newly DX children with ASD, run by the NAS. There may be a local NAS support group, have a look at their website.

People on here are very supportive and informative, stick around. Where does your DS go to school/nursery? Are they being helpful?

What is the problem exactly?
Did you not notice your child is different?
Were you really not told by anyone already that they think he's Autistic?

Did you think he was just delayed and it could be treated?

Is the problem that it's a perminant condition that's part of him?

I'm sorry for your shock.

A diagnosis is soo much better that children being left behing without support and not understood, the diagnosis means that people will begin to make alloawances for him.

I was truly relieved to get my son's diagnosis, at the same age, earlier this year, but then I had basically been acused of it being some lack of parenting by various professionals.

Fred, not everyone deals with a DX the same way. Even those who have been chasing for a DX can find that it's still a shock when it's in black and white, so to speak.

Sorry that you are feeling in shock. Its a bit like being hit by a train if you least expect it :)

You can ask for a second opinion if you feel the dx is incorrect by going to your GP or back to whoever dx your son if it was camhs you usually get a meeting to discuss the findings in the report that should be sent to you. Or you can of course pay privately and see someone.

Did you and your DH have an inkling that something else might be triggering your sons issues? Did someone else (as in proffesional) have a different view of your sons needs?

It is very difficult to get a dx I have to say. Usually there is a fight to the bitter end to actually get one.

I hope everything sorts out for you soon x

Hi,

I haven't experienced this type of situation first hand, but my best friends son has Autism and sought help from a facility that works with children with learning and behavioral problems. The clinical director is actually an Autism certified specialist. They were able to teach her some techniques to use at home when he wasn't in the center so that treatment was continuous. His behavior has since been more positive and energetic and is acting more like his age (age 5). The clinical director travels all over the country to parents who seek her help and does phone/skype consultations. Here's their website if you were interested: www.learningandbehavioralcenter.com

Lately I've noticed that parents choose to not seek outside help or they go straight to the medicinal route. Personally, I am a firm believer in behavioral therapy and I've witnessed the positive outcomes it has brought my best friends son. Hope this helps :)

Hello Londonlass. I did have exactly the with DH I think he protected himself from the shock of it all by denying it. He does now accept the diagnosis but it did take about a year.

I would advise waiting a little while learning more about autism and then if you still want a 2nd opinion you can seek it.

Big hugs.

www.autism.org.uk/ is the best place to start for advice and info. That National Autistic Society website is a mine of useful stuff and links to local charities/helpline etc.

It is a shock, yes. For what it's worth, I'm on the autism spectrum. And I'm a mum and happily married and have good friends and a good job. And I'm not at the mild end of autism, either. It's amazing what many of us can achieve, if we're given the chance.