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SN children

Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on special needs.

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Original poster

ds was dx with autism (HFA)

8 replies

voodoobarbie · 10/12/2011 11:15

We have known for ages, I thought I would feel relieved but tbh I don't feel anything just kind of empty.

We had decided to tell ds as he is very aware he is different but during the consultation he picked up on what was said and was very concerned that autism was a deadly virus so it was explained to him what Autism is and how it affects him. Once he knew it wasn't a deadly virus he wasn't bothered and said to the proff "just get to the important point, your really boring and i want to go home" :)

OP posts:

coff33pot · 10/12/2011 14:08

Aww bless him. Well hes correct proffs can be boring

I think even though you know and are expecting it there is still that wierd feeling inside you when someone else actually confirms that you were corriect. And then there is the empty feeling of "what now?" because you wait so long to get a official dx.

Its good also that your boy has taken it onboard too. At least now doors will be open to give your son the opportunity of help for any needs he has x

Ineedchristmascake · 10/12/2011 14:56

I felt odd for a couple of weeks after Dd3 was Dx'ed ASD back in September.
We were certain that she had aspergers but apparently she didn't meet all the criteria so the proff gave her an ASD dx. TBH I didn't care by that point what they Dxed her with I just knew ther was something going on and she needed help.

Just out of interest voodoo, how old is your Ds, we haven't told Dd3 yet and when we talked to the MH nurse at CAMHS he didn't seem to think we should tell her at the moment, I am not sure if I agree though as I think she needs to begin to understand why she finds some things so hard.

Dd3 is 9 by the way.

Be kind to yourself and eat chocolate if necessary.

Original poster

voodoobarbie · 10/12/2011 22:58

ds is 7 nearly 8. I thought he would be dx'd with AS but he had language delay so Autism was the dx.

I was a little gobsmacked myself when he started to explain to ds but actually I am glad. He hasn't mentioned it since and I won't go into anymore detail unless he asks or I think he needs more information.

OP posts:

IndigoBell · 11/12/2011 08:43

I would def tell a 9 year old!

Ineedchristmascake · 11/12/2011 10:43

I need help though indigo, I don't have a clue where to start. Other than school we are getting no support at all and although I know I can ask the SENCO I don't know what to ask for.

I agree that Dd3 needs to know but I think she will react badly, she is pretty much certain that she is perfect and its everyone else who has issues.

We are just beginning to see the real her for the first time in a few years after being in a school which suffocated her and I don't want to spoil it..

Any advice would be gratefully recieved. [sorry for the hijack voodoo.]

coff33pot · 11/12/2011 13:01

I think it is entirely up to wether the child is mature enough to take it all in really. Also if he/she is battling with being different and there emotional level.

DS is only 6. :e knows he is different but doesn't care. - haven't told him much other than every child is different and everyone has a list of things they can't do or need to try harder at. I know though if I spell it out to him it would be a bad move at the moment as he is smart enough to use it for his own ends to avoid attempting anything he is afraid of or doesn't want to do. I know its 3 years away but I can't see him being ready at 9 he is so much more immature than his sisters were at 6

GloriaTheHighlyFlavouredLady · 11/12/2011 18:52

She might be perfect Ineed but I bet there are things that she finds hard.

Can't remember who it was but a poster on here got her child to make a pile of things that her grandma was good at, and things that her grandma wasn't so good at, in a humourous way i.e. Grandma is very bad at jumping off walls etc.

Then she did the same exercise with the child and the child made a pile of things they were good at and things that they were not so good at.

Then explained that they are special and although they think they are unique there are actually other people out there that have roughly the same 'good' and 'not so good' abilities and that the child might like to find out more about them, but not to worry if not interested.

Would that work?

Ineedchristmascake · 11/12/2011 22:11

Hi gloria It sounds like a good idea, I just think I need time to get my head around it.

She was only Dx'ed in september after a 3.5 year battle. I think I will get xmas out of the way and then get the ball rolling in January. I have to see the SENCO then to to try to get some other support in place for her.

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