We think ds (5.5) has pathological demand avoidance. He has been seen by comm paed who has referred him onto CAHMS for further investigation.
When paed asked me how he was at school I said he had 'a few problems but is fine really' because that is the impression teachers gave to me.
However, I found out recently that he is having small group 'social communication' sessions with the senco. So, I thought I'd better go and speak to his teacher and get a clearer idea of how he is.
The meeting started with her giving me the usual platitudes we've heard before "he's not the worst in the class, there are others I'm worried about too, he will probably just 'get it' eventually" (this is her idea of being positive- I call it avoiding the real issue). But finally, with some in depth questioning, she said that he has problems listening and having genuine reciprocal conversations. He also hates 'being looked at in a particular way' and that some children do 'look at him to wind him up'. He can't take turns and finds it difficult to stop shouting out answers to questions, he hates it if he doesn't get his own way over everything. He has no empathy either.
I just wonder if when we go to the camhs appt they will say, 'lets get an ed psych to look at him, then we'll wait to see what they say' and we'll be at the end of the waiting list for that. We have already had family support before we were referred to the paed so it's taken us nine months to get this far and will probably be about a year by the time we actually get to see camhs.
If they are likely to suggest an ed psych then should I ask to be referred now?