an Xmas AIBU..

[MedusaIsHavingABadHairDay]

DS2 is 14, MLD, ASD goes to special school (where I am a TA) and also integrates into the unit of our mainstream school in the same school grounds.

He is verbal, gentle, vulnerable and a mixed bag of abilities.. savant level memory, but still believes in Santa, wants to be like the teens at the mainstream.. looks like one til he starts talking :/

In the past our school has had Primary Xmas concert and a separate senior one (songs and mince pies with parents sort of thing) which I have always been fine with.. age appropriate all round.

Last few years..JOINT concert with each class doing something vaguely Xmassy. This year full nativity job... kids dressed as sheep bla bla .

I admit I don't enjoy it (it's a lot of stress for children who don't cope well and makes them horribly anxious) but I don't object to juniors doing nativity stuff with the little ones.. that's what most schools do.

BUT I object massively to having senior pupils.. including 6 footers with moustaches and 5 o'clock shadows, being dressed in tea towels and being paraded like 4 year olds. It was bad enough with my class.. dressed up with crowns and dressing gowns, and they are yr 8.. but my son's class did a very badly rehearsed (bearing in mind several of the children are non verbal so just stood there) performance which simply made them look foolish.

Ok I may be over sensitive, but I work hard to help my son be as age appropriate as his disabilities allow.. he WANTS to fit in as much as he can, and I feel it is totally inappropriate to lump all ages together in this way... we don't go and watch mainstream yr 10 and 11s carrying fake gifts to a plastic baby in a manger....

I didn't want him taking part this year but his teacher made him (told him he had to or it would spoil it for everyone .After today I am adamant he is not taking part.. he can help operate the laptop backgrounds or switch the lights or something.

Am I being unreasonable? I totally appreciate that many of the children are developmentally primary still (and always will be) but does that mean it's OK to not differentiate? In every other sphere we DO try and treat then as the young adults they are!

(and if IABU I'm still bloody fuming because today they made my son..and all the others , look awful...)

YANBU.

YANBU.
At my DD's SN school (2.5 - 19) only the early years and lower school do the nativity play. The Middle and Upper school have a carol concert in a church and the 6th form go to the pantomime at the local theatre (no performance by the children).
I agree that it is wrong to make older children do what would normally only be expected of primary school children. If they wanted to incorporate all age groups into the same concert then it doesn't take much to 'think outside the box' and find other items for the older children to do. Eg at DD's carol concert last year they played carols on handbells (with help from willing adults) as all DD's class are non verbal. Each class did a short piece (some acting - Dickens A Christmas Carol Extract, some reading, some holding things up whilst teacher read) according to ability - any of this could easily be incorporated into a nativity type performance.
Sounds like someone is just being plain lazy at your school!!! Watch out though - they might delegate the organisation to you next year!!!!!

YANBU I would feel the same in your shoes. :)

Definitely YANBU