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How honest are you to your dc about their difficulties?

1 reply

SeasonsGripings · 02/12/2011 08:14

Ds has just been put back on the SEN Register, he is 8 years old and has been on it from aged 5-6 for poor concentration, listening and following instructions while he was receiving speech therapy.

It has become more and more apparent that while other aspects of his development seem fine, his social skills are not developing at the rate expected at his age and despite me trying my best to teach him he doesn't seem to get it. Poor eye contact, no interest in verbal or non verbal feedback when he is talking. Very poor at reading all but the most obvious non verbal actions and even when he can pick up on how someone is feeling is can't relate that to how he is behaving.

I half expected the school to dismiss my concerns but they didn't they agreed with me and have now put him into a social group designed to teach social skills through games and have suggested I get him referred to a Child Development Centre.

My struggle is how much to tell ds about his difficulties. Typing this out has made me think I probably have to be completely honest so he realises that he needs to work hard to develop these skills and take the opportunity he is being given seriously.

Any thoughts?

TIA

OP posts:
TOTU · 02/12/2011 08:26

Hi

A question I pondered not so long ago so I know how you feel.

I try to be honest without worrying my boys. I keep trips to specialists as 'light-hearted' as possible but also emphasise it's something we HAVE to do whether they like it or not. So I'm honest, but not too honest if that makes sense.

When one of them asked why they don't go their sisters' school, I said "because you need a little more help to be able to learn than she does. Your school has brilliant teachers don't you think?!" I would never have said "you've got learning difficulties and will never attend a normal school". (That's actually a pretty bad example but you get my drift).

I hope things go alright for you.

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