DS has attacked his home tutor..................

[devientenigma]

so he got up and left. He said he has to report this which is fair enough but any thoughts on what happens next and if he will be back? TIA

who does he have to report it to?

who is he employed by? you?

who is respnsible for making sure the setup with the tutor works for both the tutor and your family?

When you say attacked what exactly happened?

Was it a bad attack?

Without meaning to sound wierd or horrid, do you think the tutor somewhat deserved it (Of course he didn't, but you know, - was he completely winding up your ds or missing the point/incompetent?)

oh no :(
your boys a strong one as well. Did he say if he will be back?

He was kicking off from getting up not wanting to work with the tutor. However when he came he reluctantly got on with it. Tried some stalling and avoidance tactics. Then changed, ds said he was sad, he was sick of this and sick of the tutor and left the room. The tutor asked me to talk him into coming back in and on doing so he walked past the tutor punching him in the head a few times. After I told ds it was wrong the tutor got up and left.
He is employed by the LA, he reports to a line manager.

Lisad, he didn't say if he would be back or not.

it does not look like a bad email to me it looks like they are trying to be helpful and does ask you if you have a better idea of what would be suitable. If my aspie son did the same thing and I got that letter I would be relieved it was understanding.

as my son has done less and we have got more condemnation than understanding, It does not seem like that to me but I know how stressful A.S.d can be and you can feel like the world is out to get you and your son. hope your son is feeling more calm and hope it gets sorted out for you, its so hard and I am not posting to be horrible to you just that maybe you are feeling more set against than the letter seems to read to me, I may be way off the mark though.

I would be querying what extra training the tutor will be given to support him(?) in working with DS and his challenging behaviour. I don't know about teachers (have had bad experiences from a support worker point of view!) but in an LSW/TA type role, some form of Life Space Interview (or whatever fancy name they give it) should happen as soon as possible after an incident of this nature. If it were me - or colleagues - DS would have been informed that his behaviour was unacceptable, left to calm, then the incident would be talked through with him. He would be prompted to state what had happened from his point of view, what he wanted to get from the action, whether he thought he had acheived that aim...

All of this should have happened after something like a 10 minute time out. It can be done verbally or using a visual conversation - I've found cartoon type drawings quite good, with stick men representing the people involved. Everything very quiet and calm and non-judgemental, DS will have had his reasons for acting as he did even though they may not be obvious to the rest of the world! BTW, as far as I'm aware all this is covered in basic conflict management training.

Apologies if I'm not wording this right, I'm working two jobs at the moment and my head's not working right! Hopefully you'll be able to work out what i mean

sorry to hear this

Well they still have a duty to educate him
This recent report sets out requirements.
However they also have a duty to the tutor so perhaps need to look at training for tutor / Team Teacch / more specialist placement etc
Can't remember your situation - are you wanting a home tutor or something else?

I have replied to the email. I agree reading it again showed it was a nice email. However it put all the onus on ds. I have asked for us all to look at what led up to the incident, the behaviour and the consequences for all. I heard triggers, even though the home tutor felt it was all out of the blue. Plus I can now also see how it may work against all and I really think this all needs to be discussed at some stage.
Just a quick rehash for Agnes, ds is 10 and has been out of school nearly 2 year for specific reasons. He has always been ss due to his severe learning disabled criteria. I had a small chuckle to myself at the ASD remarks, ds has down syndrome. Although he has got diagnosed autistic traits. The profs are torn, some feel he needs a full dx and support for the traits and some don't. As for what do I want for him, I don't know any more!!

Justabout, what would you do if you were working with ds and he told you he was sad, sick of this and sick of you. Then retreat for over 10 mins in silence. Then you asked him to come back and he ran out. Then you asked me to help and then he lashed out at you?

"He turned up, he tried to engage, your son hit him."

He's been here for 2 terms and it's not the 1st time ds has been difficult. Ds also warned the tutor previous so it was more.....

He turned up, engaged for short period, ds said he was sad, sick etc, tutor ignored remarks, ds becomes increasingly difficult, I am asked to help, ds hits tutor.

Makes it a whole different ball game imo. As for me spelling it out, why did the tutor feel the need to miss it out?

However they should know now.

He is a qualified teacher though has no special needs training, hence why the email was nice about it.

Is it realistic for me to be involved at all, I mean if he was in school.........well this is his education, an hour, 4 days per week provided by the LA.

No, Perception, it's not ABA, ds is primarily down syndrome. I agree, has this reinforced the behaviour? which is why I think it all needs to be discussed.

It would be silly as it would look like we are not working with the authority. As for working with them, I do my best, they don't listen to me never mind ds. So I hope they work it out for themselves. Wrong I know but what else can I do?

I'm not looking for anything unreasonable. Just didn't know which way to turn after he left. I have replied to the email just as nice I hope.

As for the future, who knows, I know home tuition is gradually going downhill, although the tutor isn't back until Monday and the incident may have put off ds.

I just want a bit or normality, like everyone else. I want ds issues to be heard, like everyone else.

I just wish I knew what would work.