'My head is not a basketball'

[sotilltomorrow]

So my son, 7 yr old diagnosed aspergers & speech disorder, says.

Found myself saying to the 'school' today :

'My son is neurologically impaired, as such he is at far greater risk of epilepsy than a non-impaired child, he really shouldn't be having his head repeatedly hit off the ground.'

I have no fight left.

He is on an ASP level 4... Scotland (Glasgow) - statutory document.

Back at school after half-term & in-service day yesterday.
School called today to say that yes, my son's head was repeatedly hit off the floor while being kicked & punched.

Worst nightmare.

Didn't sleep till 5am this morning.

Put him in earlier today, stated complaint, complaint confirmed.

My son has had his head repeatedly bashed off the floor.

'My head is not a basketball.'

I so need to sleep tonight. Picture constantly my son & his head.

Think I should visit the Govan Law Centre tomorrow, get advice.

Anyone been through similar?

urgh. what did school say? you are within your rights to make a formal police complaint - has he sustained any noticeable injury/ bruising? take photos etc.

what have school done with perpetrators? witnesses? exclusions? suspension?

that's appalling, I am so sorry. I would take him to GP as well asap, get him checked out, and get this documented.

Feel so angry for you and sad for your ds.

Agree with madwoman - take photos, make complaint to school and cc governors.

Also ask what started it, what action are they going to take to stop it happening again and what happens if it does. Ask to see an action plan and ask for someone to be assigned responsibility for it.

Can you say you can't let your son into school again until they ensure his safety?

Hope your ds had a better day today.

School head is upset. Perpetrator is constantly perpetrating!

Think they hope I will send him in tomorrow, as per.

Why should I? They have neglected their duty of care.

I reacted on what my son told me (Not easily forthcoming, say the least), proved correct when 'children' questioned.

What safety can I delude myself my son has now in this school?

It's how to keep going, in the face of it all.

When you fight for protection that statutory documents give & then this happens.

My son has no protection.

No answer I know.

re duty of care - use the term 'safeguarding' in your letters. they have failed in their responsibilities, particular if this is a repeat offender, for want of a better term.

there is an answer, particularly if this is an isolated bully. both children are being failed.

what have they done with the culprit, as it appears it is only one? suspension? if not, police report. you have to force the schools hand in some way. unnaceptable for it to be swept under the carpet repeatedly.

copy everything to c of g and lea.

I have amplified my feelings that the child who perpetuated the situation has 'additional needs' too.

I have stated that his needs have failed to be met resulting in my son's assault.

Have the feeling they will 'show willing' to get all back on status quo, but my son's difficulties mean repercussion is inevitable.

How do I teach a gentle bear of a seven year old (size of at least 9 yr old) to take no further nonsense?

This is awful to say the least.

I agree your son should be taken to the doctors for a check up bless him and to log it happened incase it does get swept under carpet.

Does your son have a TA present during the day? Perhaps for the time being she could be on watch during playtimes too?

I do hope for both boys sakes that the school call in the parents of the other boy and discuss additional help for him too as he clearly needs to let his frustrations out in a more acceptable way.

really sad.

do you know the other parent/s? are they fighting for more support as well?

this stuff is awful. two boys (i assume) being let down totally.

hope he's ok. is there a way you can teach him just to scream really really loudly to attract attention if it happens again? or shout 'no, no, no' at the top of his lungs?

i have to say i would be removing him from the school for a couple of days whilst i delievered all my letters and waited for reassurance of my son's safety from all of the appropriate authorites before reinstating him. you won't get it, of course, but at least it will register the seriousness of the situation.

poor little man.

def c of g though. and the governor who has responsibility for sn. (sometimes the c of g, sometimes not)

Thanks for the input, I really appreciate it.

Shall be keeping him off today & tomorrow at least. Meant to be getting SALT at school this morning, tried to arrange different location yesterday, not able to. Shall have to let that go for the moment as I feel my son just isn't safe in school.

School want me to go in for a meeting, say they will do 'risk assessment' - have had a bellyful of meetings that result in inaccurate minutes and no change.

Am so jaded now. Could cry.

Shall try & nip him to the docs later & probably phone the police for some advice. May phone the Law Centre as they are very good on Additional needs stuff.

Off to put coffee on, perk myself up a bit!

you are absolutely right to keep him off for rest of the week (at least).in any case medically he needs an extra eye on him for at least 24hours re:concussion etc. sounds like they need to massively improve their playtime supervision (was this a breaktime incident)?

This is awful !Where the hell were the staff?? It's not as though your child was pushed or shoved;he had his head REPEATEDLY bashed on the ground.

I would make a formal complaint to the school (governors etc)I would ask for a copy of the safeguarding/anti-bullying policy (and anything else that seems appropriate.)

I think you are doing the right thing to contact the law centre.

It does sound as though the other child is being let down too,but that should not be allowed to impact on your DS's safety.

I would certainly take him to doc and keep him off for a couple of days.

My DS is just 8 and I would be furious if anything like this happened. I would expect something to be done immediately .......or I would be exploring the possibility of moving schools.

You sound like a good mum and you're doing the best for your DS.Hope you feel a little better than earlier this morning.

Thanks again for the input.

It was in class time, not break or lunchtime.

Spoke to a lovely policewoman on the phone & now know what to do if I decide to involve them. Part of me feels if I don't my son will continue to be bullied. I have spoken to the school many times about it, told 'in hand' etc. yet I would say my son has been hit, jumped on, jacket ripped, possessions abused by this boy at least twice a week. This incident is just the latest. My son is not the only pupil who suffers at this boy's hands, other parents have had similar & complained.

My son finally likes school, has settled well this year. Have had the school refusal, physically forcing him there etc. for years. He doesn't really 'get' the bullying & doesn't want to change school. I would look to move out of Glasgow area for better schools but suspect it would bankrupt me. Just rent.

School have to phone back for time of a meeting there tomorrow. I have an older son (24) who will come with me. He has plenty fire in him which I'm lacking at the moment.

It is just so upsetting & draining.
Shall sleep better tonight & deal with it tomorrow.

When you phone the police can you ask that a community police officer comes to the school meeting with you? Not to speak to the other boy as they cant without the parents present and if he does have additional needs then a different approach would be needed. Do you know the parents, are they aware their son needs help too? have they been told this event took place? The community police liase with our school down here and encourage and do talks regarding anti-bullying and they are up to date with the law too. Perhaps then the school will take this seriously.

bless you.

sometimes you do have to take an additonal step to force some sort of action - and i think requesting the community police officer to go into school for your meeting might reinforce to the school that they can't ignore the situation any longer. also ask for the chair of governors to be there. if they are stalling, call the lea yourself and request the school sip be there. they do need to know that you mean business in safeguarding terms. and that they are failing both children (and any others who have been involved in incidents)

hope ds is okay today x

Quick update, while I have a moment!

Meeting went ok, head teacher did risk assessment. Am relieved to say they are taking it very seriously. I stated it was not an option to send my son back as usual & wait till another assault took place. Incidents about two or three times a week since August start back, including my son being told he was going to be pushed down the stairs, culminating in incident that this thread details.

My older son (24) has friend in Police so we got some help with regard to a specific law to quote regarding failure of action taken when notified of safety issue.

My 7yr old back in school today, more supervision shall be in place.

Other boy's parents have been informed & are being 'fully cooperative' with school.

My headache has almost gone...

Parenting my son with Aspergers I know 'bullying' has never been & will never be far from the surface, but such repeated incidents from one other child where school don't take action is just not on.

Spoke on phone to Solicitor at Govan Law Centre, Glasgow, who specialises in Additional Support Law, again very helpful. Great resource to have locally.
www.additionalsupportneeds.org.uk/about/glc.htm

I shall have to be far more proactive from now on as I do feel I should have been more forceful far earlier on & saved my son a whole load of grief.

Live & learn.

Thanks again for all the support.

That is great news that the school are finally taking you and your sons concerns seriously :)

The fact that the other parents are also supportive of the concerns gets you half way there too. Hopefully the other boy will also get help with his issues.

I hope your son gets to enjoy his time at school from now on x

The other parents being 'fully coorperative' with school is good.

Hope things work out for your ds and yourself and that your ds will feel more secure in school and start to enjoy it.

Good luck.