DS broke my heart!

[StarlightMcKenzie]

He is excited about his forthcoming 5th birthday (he has ASD).

He said, I will be 5, and then I will be 6 and then I will be 7 and then I will be 8, and when I am 8, I will be good at talking.

I told him he was already good at talking but he got cross and tearful and said he was not clever at it.

These things are always so heartbreaking because the fact that he is aware and able to articulate his feelings about what he isn't good at is incredible and amazing progress, but at the same time, look what it does!

The saddest thing ds ever said to me was during a conversation about his Main Stream school and how I was going to find him a school that had other kids with autism and how when went there everyone would understand him.

He started crying and said "I don't want to go there, I am a naughty boy and other boys with autism will be horrible like me". I realised then quite how awful life was for him in mainstream, always being the odd one out and how negatively he was beginning to view himself and his ASD.

Oh akaem

Did you move him?

I think the one that choked me the most was at the beginning when school thought he was just a bad boy and a Teacher commented to DS I dont know why you have to behave like this DS.

He came home that day after having a christmas lesson on the nativity. Went to bed and then said to me mummy I have done a bad thing. You know you picked me and dd from a star and that we were special. Well I been naughty and I threw my star up high and its gone too far and I cant reach it. Now the angels have it and gave it to god. Thats my good star and now I cant get it back and I cant be good.

Yes, pulled him out a couple of weeks later and then spent the next few months battling with the LA and being reported to the Educational Welfare Service (or whatever they are called now) in spite of having full GP notes to cover all absence.

He is starting a new school on Monday actually, a mainstream one again but with an ASD unit attached, which I actually cried embarassingly in front of everyone when I saw it. They all pretended not to notice though. I don't know if it will work out but it can't be any worse than what he was going through and I will pull him out again if I have to.

Good luck with that akaem. Hopefully that will be a good solution for you and DS.

Coff there's literally nothing I can say to you about that post except (hugs)

Thanks Wilson I spend an awful lot of time telling how special and good he is and how people just need to understand him. I think I have managed to undo a lot of the damage.

Awww that workman was only joking but I can see why you'd get upset.
It's just a 'normal' thing to say and he was being friendly bless him but for us building a wall is tantamount to finding life on another planet!

I have a few friends who are gay. one day they were telling me how their parents reacted- one was cool about it but the other persons parents were wild and upset.
I said tell your parents that they should thank their lucky stars you have the ability to have a relationship of any kind; I'd give my right arm for my boys to know reciprocal love I wouldn't care if it came in the form of same sex or not.

He reminded me of this a year or so later and said it really struck a chord with him!