just had a phonecall that broke my heart

[jenk1]

from ds,s school that we have just taken him out of.

It was from the deputy head "DS is so bright academically he is the top of the class,can he not just muddle through until his assesment finishes,its such a shame his education will fall behind"

I told her that his emotional and mental health wellbeing are more important to me and dh than any test result,if he,s as bright as what they say then surely he can catch up when he goes to a new school?
"oh you dont want him to fall behind?"

Think they care more about figures and ofstedt reports than a childs wellbeing, i find that very sad

I rang the school that i think will be ideal for ds this morning, she said we need a referral from LEA, so phoned LEA,they said they need a refferal from CAMHS GRRRR

Its all RED TAPE its makes me seeth

We had the same sort of attitude at da old school accept they wanted rid of him so that he didn't affect their precious figures

I know just what you mean about bloody red tape - the lEA make you jump through hoops just to get the best for your child.

Persevere though as for my ds the new school has been amazing. This time last year he had just returned from his second exclusion in a month and was only allowed to do 1 hour a day in a tiny room with no windows, with 2 adults and no access to his peers. Now he is at school fulltime and doing really well - things couldn't be more different

Good luck with it all

The head teacher has also just phoned me and told me that in her opinion that we are doing the right thing for ds.

Also she said that the brand new "state of the art" school that is being built at the bottom of my street will have NO provision for special needs!!!

I cant believe that, i think its terrible

Also she said that the brand new "state of the art" school that is being built at the bottom of my street will have NO provision for special needs!!!
Thats illegal!!!!!!!!!

well, all sorts of things have happened since monday, parent partnership are now involved.

SEN dept told me "you must put him back in school straightaway or we wont help you"

i cant put him back there not while he,s depressed/self harming.

i thought SEN were supposed to help children with special needs.

Jenk...here goes.

You Ds is suffering from depression caused by an inappropriate school placement. He goes to school each day and cant cope because the school dont know how to cope with his needs...you do!
Go to your Gps' and ask him to sign your Ds off from school with a letter saying he is suffering from depression and is self harming....ask to be referred to CAMHS urgently.
Once your GP has signed your DS off from school contact the LEA and tell them you want a Link Education Officer appointed to your son. Also contacted your EWO...Educational Welfare Officer. Tell them your son is depressed and self harming and this is a direct result of his needs not being met. Tell the EWO that you want your sons educational needs met but he can not possibly learn anything whilst he is in such a fragile state. Tell them that your sons educational need is not being met and that you are worried that he will fall behind. It is upto the LEA to provide your son with an education that is differentiated to meet his needs and this is not happening. Regardless of whether your son has a statement or not the school are duty bound to provide him with a safe and secure learning envioronment...this includes not only educationallly but also emotionally.
Once you have the letter stating your son is unwell you can request Link Education...upto 15 hours a week tutoring provided by the LEA in your own home.
Once you have a tutor you will be able to draw up a new IEP that will help to combat some of the problems you are facing...education is not just aout sitting and writing...its about learning how to cope with life and social situations. The Link Tutor will be able to draw up lessons with strategies inplace for helping your Ds develop a better self worth.

What ever you do DO NOT remove your sons name from the school register...do that and then the LEA can wash their hands of you..you will be responsible for all of his educational requirements. If you want to home ed than its fine to do tghis and I'd suggest that you join Education Otherwise which have all the info you need on the legalities etc of home edding.
If however you wnat your son to be educated away from home and are seeking a more appropriate placement then dont remove his name....get him signed off sick and fight like hell to get the right placement for him.
Whilst your Ds is at home you will feel calmer because you havent got the daily dread of dealing with every day school things...you can focus on getting his self esteem up and he will be happier...therefore so will you be.

It took me a yearof fighting to get J where he needed to be..Ihad my doubts a few times that was doing the wrong thing by fighting for a special school placement but now I know the fight was worth it...my J is sooooo happy and so content at school. Life is a breeze most days...we have our up and downs but they are not half as bad as they were when he was in mnainstream.

All that pent up frustration and anger caused by being in an alien environmemet was just heart breaking to watch...and painful too when he was lashing out at me...still suffereing with my broken leg caused by his biggest meltdown...but hey my leg will mend...J being happy is what matters the most and he is 100% better than he was.

good luck and just shout if you need any help...you have my email addy.

thanks jayzmummy you have been so helpful, the EWO has mentioned link tutoring to me,she is coming to see me on monday