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Original poster

I don't beeelieeeeve it!

43 replies

bochead · 10/06/2011 23:06

It was seriously suggested my statemented (mainstream NC levels) Year 2 lad rejoin nursery today. I had a Victor Meldrew meets Catherine Tate "mad Mum melt down".

"Wot a diabolical liberty"

Apparently it's most important my son is "happy".

Hey ho, hey ho to tribunal we will go
The lea are dunderheads hey ho, hey, hey ho, hey ho

OP posts:
coff33pot · 10/06/2011 23:14

what?...........not at you bochead at them Confused

Is this to make it easier for them then to just put him in a nursery instead of cater for his needs otherwise?

Sorry if I am barking up the wrong tree but I will join you in your song

hey ho hey ho bochead is going for goal Grin

devientenigma · 10/06/2011 23:16

hey ho hey ho hey ho hey ho Grin, sorry just wanted to join in, hope you win

TotalChaos · 10/06/2011 23:28

wtf? on what planet is that inclusion.

EllenJaneisnotmyname · 10/06/2011 23:31

They cannot be seeerious! Sorry, not funny, I know. That's just not a viable suggestion. I can understand holding him back a year, maybe, but that will be hard, socially, and academically makes no sense.

Original poster
bochead · 10/06/2011 23:33

I'm convinced the professionals all tried the blue pills before this afternoon's meeting.

I'm not gonna go into all the details but it started with "he doesn't need the salt named in his statement as he's not got a full diagnosis of asd". The middle was used for the "blame the Mum game". It ended with school wanting him in nursery for 3 hours a day instead of his peer group. (They can't cope with him so that's the solution.)

My Gran used to say "As ignorant does, so ignorance begets" - no more negotiation from me I'm afraid. Only a tribunal can deal with that lot - If the tribunal is willing to travel down the rabbit hole into the VERY strange world of my LEA.

If you included it as a scene in a novel it'd be rejected for being too unrealistic. I'm not sure now my lad isn't right and Oooods and other alien life forms aren't secretly taking over the planet some days.

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EllenJaneisnotmyname · 10/06/2011 23:36

Sorry, bochead, how old is your DS?

corsilk · 10/06/2011 23:38

The school want him in nursery? Jesus F Christ.
Was it the LEA that said he didn't need SALT due to no dx? CAMHS keep telling us that support is based on need and not dx.

EllenJaneisnotmyname · 10/06/2011 23:51

Lots of SALTs say they can't help ASD, so a DX is actually a hindrance! It's never easy, is it?

Original poster
bochead · 10/06/2011 23:53

nearly 7.

LEA Officer now says he doesn't need it cos I've had the temerity to ask wh it isn't being provided. (same one that wrote statement based on salt reports stating he did need salt!)

Good thing I'm teaching him at home in the afternoons really isn't it?

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EllenJaneisnotmyname · 11/06/2011 00:03

Nearly 7! What are they playing at? If they are saying nursery then he needs a suitably academic SS, FGS!

Triggles · 11/06/2011 06:47

I'm sorry... I must have misunderstood something... they're suggesting you put your 7yo DS in NURSERY when he is currently in yr2??? Shock

How can they even consider it, much less suggest it? The mind boggles, it truly does!! Most important your son is happy, my eye - it's most important he is happy AND educated appropriately! I cannot believe it either. Points to you for not punching the lot of them!

IndigoBell · 11/06/2011 07:12

FFS. Words fail me.

Really sorry bochead and little boc.

Ben10isthespawnofthedevil · 11/06/2011 07:18

Angry Absolutely outstanding incompetence

Becaroooo · 11/06/2011 08:32

Fucking twatish dunderbastards Shock

Am so angry on your behalf Angry

geeandfeesmum · 11/06/2011 08:36

Well done to you for keeping your cool as well as you did. What a ridiculous, completely out of line and offensive suggestion. Good luck with the tribunal.

Original poster
bochead · 11/06/2011 08:43

Er I didn't keep my cool I'm afraid : (. The old arms were flapped like a windmill and I'm ashamed to say I deffo raised my voice to forbid it. That's right forbid - no "Mum is unhappy" in the notes from that meeting unless they were deaf.

Aside from being incompetent and offensive it's dangerous as he had a serious regression at four (no he didn't get ANY professional help!) and this Mum will not risk a repeat.

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asdx2 · 11/06/2011 09:02

OMG bochead they are obviously on the same stuff our LEA is on.

FWIW ds and dd stayed in nursery for an extra year and it was beneficial for them but it was at my behest and I had to fight the LEA with the school for it to happen. Unbelievable that it should be suggested for a child of 7 when I had to fight tooth and nail.

I'll be singing alongside you "Hey ho hey ho......."

Original poster
bochead · 11/06/2011 09:27

I'm now thinking I need to ask for an out of borough placement at tribunal to protect him from people who have no interest in actually educating him either socially or academically. Not ideal for a kid who just went through 3 placements in one academic year but long term these people are not competent to be entrusted with the care of a goldfish.

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asdx2 · 11/06/2011 09:38

I am going to tribunal for out of borough independent too not least because there is no similar or suitable provision in our LEA.

Triggles · 11/06/2011 09:43

Not sure I'd even leave a goldfish with them.... Hmm

Triggles · 11/06/2011 09:44

maybe a rock? Grin

coff33pot · 11/06/2011 12:49

oi! rocks have feelings too! Grin

tryingtokeepintune · 11/06/2011 14:11

Oh bochead - I would like to say I can't believe it but nothing really surprises me anymore. The trouble is these people actually try to justify their actions as being in the interest of the child!

We used to have 'blame mum' too until I asked them at a meeting to clarify what parenting principles they were criticizing and then it was, oh no, we are not talking about parenting!

Are you going to do something about non-provision of salt in the meantime?

Do you think the LA will actually put that suggestion to the tribunal?

Good luck and please keep us informed.

smileANDwave2000 · 11/06/2011 14:54

bloody cheapskates is what it is the cheek of it aggghhh you go gettem girl its beyond belief

Original poster
bochead · 11/06/2011 15:00

What can I do except read, research and implement ALONE interventions which may help my son overcome his deficits until tribunal? Same as the last 3 years really. He'll stay at school till the end of this term to evidence gather for tribunal then I'll see where I stand with solicitor, SS, Cahms etc and make a choice from there.

In a sense it's a bonus he's only there 3 hours a day with that kind of attitude - reduces their opportunity to do too much damage I suppose. I would welcome the opportunity to earn a living same as everyone else though to be able to help finance my lone ranger interventions.

Sad thing is I do wonder how many of today's prison population were once lil lads like my son - with an illiteracy rate running at 60% for jail inmates you have to wonder don't you? What the hell happens to kids whose Mum's can't fight for a huge variety of reasons from EAL, to poverty to their own SEN?

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