wwyd? Swimming lessons not working our for DD SLI.

[used2bthin]

Hi my DD 4 and a half has been having swim lessons for one and a half terms and tbh although she has enjoyed them she hasn't learned much and just walks up and down the side of the pool blowing bubbles. She looks so obviously oblivious that I guess other parents can see that she has SN but I still sit feeling like people are thinking what is that child doing!! The other kids will be following the instructions and every now and then the teacher will say look what they are doing and DD will laugh and carry on as she is (love her!) or if it is jumping in he might get out and join in but holding the teachers hand.

Anyway then she worked out that she could wander into the rest of the baby pool after the lesson so has been doing that and I can't do much at that point as am fully dressed so have had to ask a parent to help twice. last week was the final straw. There is a new ish teacher now who is nice but very young and has turned to me before now when Dd has been ignoring him and said what do I do?! Anyway so last week she wondered off again and I had two life guards approach me to say could I not walk by the pool fully clothed. I said what the problem with and one apologised then walked off when I asked for help getting DD out. The second one I was more direct with and said could he or someone else get her (its about knee deep and they wear tiny shorts so would have been easy. He said no and walked away so again a nice dad came to the rescue.

I came home feeling humilated and sad that DD is so different from the other kids and rang the manager to say I just can't do it any more. He apologised but came up with the following solutions.

1 DD and I join the younger kids class and I go in with her
2 I pay for private lessons (I can put the money I ave already paid towards this and then would take DD elsewhere as I have heard of a better class where the instructor gets in the water with the children).

But I am upset that those are the solutions although I don't know what I wanted him to say. It feels a bit like he is agreeing with me that they can't accomodate her needs and after the way the staff behaved last week i feel like never going there again.

Thanks for getting this far, wwyd?

Both the suggestions look good ideas to me. The younger classes may be more fun and that's important to keep them interested and thinking it's fun. A private lesson is also good as you'll get more attention, but can be expensive and a good thing about a group lesson is all the songs and interaction with the other children. How about trying the group lessons to start off with and see how you go. If they don't work out then try the private lessons.

Our 6 year old has been having swimming lessons at a particular pool since she was 6 months old. We have kept her in a younger age group class for the past couple of years as it is more fun with songs, toys etc and my husband or I can go in with her. Us and the swimming teachers were toying with the idea a few months ago of whether to move her up a group but it's then no parents in the pool but she can't be on her own due to physical disabilities and speech delay or they said we could get CRB checked and go in with her in hte older lesson (you have to be CRB checked as there are no other parents in those lessons). The older classes also are more formal without songs and toys etc. To be honest she is so happy with the current class she is in, thinks it is lots of fun and she is gradually improving in technique that we all decided it would be best not to move her up. Consequently we still have a very happy child who absolutely loves swimming lessons, has lots of fun during the lesson, is very sociable with the other children and parents during the lesson, she is still improving in technique and she talks about going swimming an awful lot.

Good luck with your choices. I hope it works out for you.

Younger class sounds like good plan for now. Later on, one-to-one or small group lessons are likely to be useful, particularly the ones where the teacher gets in the pool. Lots of swimming teachers do have experience of dc with SN. The one subject that should be teachable without much language really ought to be the one where the students' ears are mostly underwater.

And tbh, your current lot might want reminding of the equalities act. Particularly the lifeguards, who are probably emplyed by the council and following some child protection rule... which is actually putting a child with special needs in danger.

I have resorted to private lessons for my DSs and they have been amazing.

DS (10) has learnt a very competant doggy paddle in about 6 lessons. I never ever thought he'd be able to do that.

DS (7) hasn't learnt anything yet :) But I think he is on the verge of doggy paddling, so will give him another 2 or 3 lessons before deciding whether to continue or not.

4.5 is very young, and your DD probably wouldn't make brilliant progress in that age at private lessons either (but she might).

Group lessons don't work for the majority of kids. And a lot of kids resort to private because group lessons just don't work......

we went with private lessons for dd1.

we never tired group lessons, mostly because my feeling as that she would behave as your dd does - oblivious to the lesson, me not in the water so powerless to help out, no one lse can help etc etc.

dd1 did not learn to swim from her private lessons (but then we were starting form a point of recovering form water phobia, and she was still extremely nervous/clingy in the pool) but hse did still learn an awful lot. how to be comfortable, how to relax in the water, she got used to going under water, and she got used to splashing and being spalshed. the most important thign she learned was to enjoy herself.

she was about 4.6 when we did this.

she is now 6.5, and swims with the schol (which, due to her school structure, is still 1:1, just with one of her tutors, not with a swimming instructor), and she is now jst about doggy paddling along (albeit with armbands still).

we were satisfied with the progress she made with private lessons, but as I said, we were at a very different starting point.

My DS has had 1:1 lessons and group lesson in a very small group of younger children and has found both work well. Now he is a little older he is having 1:1 lessons but I have emphasised to the tutor that if they push him too hard he will quit and I would rather they focus on building his confidence in the water and make it enjoyable rather than push technique and so on.

Ask around for the best place locally, I have tried two different swim schoools and the current one we use was recommended to me by other parents of children with special needs, and I too have gone on to recommend them - they are just great with DS.

Thanks for the replies. I think I am probably being over sensitive but I just feel like not giving them my business now. However, it is our local pool and I have already paid for the next 7 weeks so should probably use that and switch lessons. I had been leaning towards using it for private lessons but maybe the younger lesson could be fun. I didn't go with that to start with as DD is so tall so I felt she would stand out but she does anyway in the older class.

I agree I think swim lessons where the teacher is on the edge of the pool rather than in it with the children is madness, although my friend's dd is doing well I think it only suits very motivated children with good hearing and attention skills. DD can't process language well so its doubly difficult.

x posted with silverfrog and WhoWhoWhoWho, I have had recommendations for a man locally who has a pool at his house and does lessons with small groups of children. I have heard he is good with kids with SN so it may be worth a shot. I certainly won't be staying with the current place as soon as this term is done.

I think it is the first real inclusion problem DD has come across and thankfully she is unaware of it really and loves going swimming. I agree its confidence building and enjoyment so had said to the teacher don't worry. Its the bit at the end and I think a more experienced teacher would have strategies to deal with behaviour. As for the lifeguards they were awful and the manager said they should have helped and he'd make sure the whole team know thier responsibilities so it is being dealt with I just feel fed up with the place now!

we're planning on private lessons for ds (4.5 ASD primarily language issues), dd started group lessons when she was 5.5 (she's a club standard swimmer now) I doubt we'd start ds any younger than that in formal lessons.

He goes swimming twice a week with dh & we've used that as an opportunity to get compliance stuff dealt with (changing nicely, not running off, coming when called, having a shower, familiarity with different pools & staff etc) - that's taken about a year. He has tried the younger children's classes (which have adults in the pool) - but tbh he found it pretty boring, lots of toddlers & babies.

He won't wear armbands but has developed his own doggy paddle & is confident getting into out of the water & getting face wet etc. I think that's a lot of the battle to start with. There is no way that he could manage in a group lesson & really needs someone in the pool with him.

arent there any pools that offer swimming for SN kids in your area (where volunteers, well trained swimming teacher who want SN experience get in the water and have 2-3 kids each)?

I think we need to be taking DD more ourselves, I aim for once a week but it often doesn't happen.

blueshark the local SN school have them and they have lessons after school times that are for anyone (as in not SN kids as they have them in the day-those that attend the school anyway) but the teachers are the same as for the SN school children so would have a lot of experience. Only thing is they again don't get in the pool and this experience has made me wary. The whole thing is upsetting as DD will be starting mainstream school in september and I am terrified, she is on the level of a two year old in a lot of areas and even with the full time 1-1 she should get, I am not confident. And spend each swim lesson being reminded of how hard it will be.

You say your DD is pretty unaware of it all, my DS is like this (and also big for his age) and I think in your shoes you should go to the younger group for te rest of the term you have paid for. DS was much bigger and older than all the other dcs in his small group lesson he used to have, he didn't give a hoot it was fun for him and he enjoyed it. I did have comments from some of the 3 yr olds saying "why is that big boy wearing armbands" or "I can swim better than him mummy". The mums were all nice though and supportive.

The guy locally sounds good - tutors who have plenty of experience with special needs are worth their weight in gold IMO.

Yes I think that given that the private instructor hasnt even called me back yet and dd should be at a lesson tomorrow, I will go for the younger group for the next 7 weeks then try the man locally, I think three people have mentioned how good he is now so worth a try. In the meantime I will keep taking her and ignore the lifeguards.

My ds1 has both...some very small group lessons (i.e. 2/3 dc to a teacher who is in the pool with them) and sometimes he has 1-1. Its £10 for 25 mins.

He is doing very well.

Thats good to hear becraroo. I am going to try the mother and baby group tomorrow and ask for the remaining money I paid for the lessons we won't use to be given to me as credit so I can do the mother and baby group or take her myself.

used I took ds1 on my own (or dh took him) til he was 6...he just wasnt ready for group sessions/formal swimming teaching til then.

He learnt to ride his bike and his scooter at about the same time so, for ds1, I think it was developmental.

xx

Thanks beceroo. Dd has very disordered development I think because her physical skills are actually a bit ahead of her age but only large physical, she is delayed by nearly two years in small motor I think. She has a real skill for imitation so I thought she would watch the other children and copy what they did but I think actually its too much going on so her brain just kind of switches off to it and she spends the whole time in her own world! The mother and child session I am going to try today is just songs and things so not so structured and at least I will be there too so I will give it a go and just take her myself for a bit too and see how she gets on before even trying a different class.

She got on better than I expected when I took her to a dance class for two terms but it was very informal and she didn't have to listen at all there just copy the movements. She loved that actually maybe it would have been a better bet.

Ds1 did karate - til it got too complicated!! - and he loved it and it really helped him as that was just copying moves/fitness levels...he is very fit!!!!

She will enjoy it with you there

Thanks becaroo. Well we went to the baby session and it really was mainly babies and DD ran away hen we got out this time and I could hear her manically laughing but couldn't see her at one point, argh! Anyway it was ok but not really what I am after and I had decided to just take her myself for a bit then the private instructor called me to say that I could use my paid up money towards private lessons with him but why not tell him a little about her first. So I started telling him and it turns out his son has just been diagnosed with something similar (won't go into too much detail on here). So he suggested I let DD have a go at his group lesson to save me paying extra for private and if it doesn't work out we'll talk about private lessons. He sounded so confident and obviously has some understanding of her issues personally so I feel much more optimistic, he even said he'll just go in and get her if she does the usual wandering off thing. Funny how these things turn out!

Oh wow, that sounds fab!

Sometimes these things happen for a reason I guess!
Hope it all works out for you x

Thank you yes fingers crossed!x