fed up

[cheeryface]

today ds2 (12) has shoved me and nearly knocked me off my feet.
spat at me .
held a big screw to his head and threatened to stick it in his head and then came at my head with it.
thrown all the bedding off my bed and thrown everything around it (nice tip)
left the house with no shoes on saying he was never coming back.
thrown a spoon and a basket down the stairs at me
screamed , shouted , cried
because i found he had stolen £20 off me and i confronted him about it.

my mum has taken ds1 (15) to her house so he has half a chance of doing school revision.
i was supposed to be taking ds2 for new school shoes.
fed up.
sorry , moan over.

So sorry you've had such a stressful day. Hope it gets better and you get a chance to relax at some point today!

oh it's so difficult. Do you know what he wanted the money for? Sometimes this can seem less confrontational. Otherwise go outside and kick the wall, jump on the trampoline, have a strong coffee or all 3 usually works for me.

im guessing more fishing gear. We took him out yesterday to buy fishing equipment , he spent £55 of his own money on it. probably didnt like having not much left !
ive posted here on sn but we dont even know if he has sn . still waiting for camhs to see him .
this is not right for a 12 year old though is it
thanx for the replies x

Not sure really if this is normal but my brother tried to break into a car at 13 which did not go down with my prison officer father. He took him down to the local policestation and shut him in a cell for an hour. He didn't do it again but i guess the PC brigade would have a fit if you tried that. Maybe just a faze but i would lay it on the line about consequences. I do this with my son and he has very complex SN. Right and wrong are very basic skills for most children and even with sn kids most can deal with this if things are black and white. Good luck.

Can you get a community PC involved?? (My mum got one to talk to my bro once when he stole money - it worked!)

It might make him see there are consequences to actions like this for older children/people? (it might also prove to the sn specialists that he needs help!)

Tbh, I would punish my 2.5 year old for that behaviour....it must be so hard for you Is your ds bigger than you??

yes just slightly bigger than me but i am only 5ft 1 !

Must be scary when he gets violent.....how are things today?

just seen this beca , thanx for asking, all calm until today. had to go for the new shoes which i knew was going to be difficult. He really wanted Timberland boots which he insists everyone at school wears. I dont think the school really like them to wear them though ! He has always worn clarks shoes but now they just wont do !
trouble is theres no way i am paying £85 for school shoes so i said we would look for a similar cheaper alternative.
would not entertain anything but super expensive which resulted in a lot of stress and me being shoved in the shopping centre and my hand squeezed so hard my finger cracked .
got it sorted in the end and ds2 had to miss out on the usual saturday night sweet treats.
this is really upsetting i am really hoping the appointment at camhs on monday is some use .

oh dear. sorry to hear that.....the instant gratification thing can be the hardest thing with kids, I think

Let me know how you get on with cahms x

i totally know where your comming from my DS is ASD and Dysprxic and im 4ft10 hes same height DH is very tall so it does worry me hes getting bigger than me and when he goes into meltdown im finding it harder and harder to controll him he has hit me and hits his siblings but not his dad as he can shout louder than a fighorn which DS hates i feel like a timid mouse sometimes Ds is very loud too finding suitable punishments is nion impossible and has to be right away later is no good and the fussyness about clothes ect where you buy them is all familiar CAMHS have been totally useless i do hope they help you better than myself im sure there alll different depending where you live , try ebay for the boots or odd site to mention i know but cadets direct see if some catch his eye there, the big thing is to not let him know he scares you or he will get worse and sound in control even if inside your shaking in your boots, in my case saying you cant have this or that makes no difference to him i have to use as they do at school for consistancy use possitives / rewards for good behaviour rather than sanctions after the negative event IYSWIM hope this helps