How do you distinguish between bad behaviour vs. Lack of understanding?

[proudmum74]

Hi - my dd who is 1 and has Down's started mainstream nursery on a part-time basis a few months ago. Whilst on the whole we've noticed a really positive step change her development as she has other dc to learn from, I've also started to notice that she's developed some bad habits, mainly grunting/shouting if she can't reach something or wants attention & throwing any toys she no longer wants.

I've been telling her/signing 'no' and taking her toys off her if she throws them at people, but I'm not sure she understands why. As she's my only child, can anyone provide any guidance on how I can distinguish between whether this is genuinely bad behaviour or if she just doesn't understand?

Thanks!

Hi proudmum. I think it sounds like pretty normal 1 year old behaviour. Mine were forever throwing toys, those with communication problems and those without! Still unacceptable whatever the reason. Perhaps she's hitting terrible 2 a bit early! It is a really frustrating time for DC (and their parents) as even NT DC can't communicate their wants and desires.

Signing can be a really useful tool, but even acting things out or photographs can help with getting your point across. Also to give your DD some small control over her life and lessen her frustration you could offer her choices of snack or toy, initially by using the actual objects accompanied by the words and signs, then maybe with photos, words and signs then just words and signs etc.

But don't worry. See it another developmental milestone reached. Some are less positive than others!

Thanks EllenJane - I was worried that I was maybe telling her off for something that she didn't understand, so it's helpful to know this is normal We've been trying signing for the past few months without much success, but we're still trying...

She's one year old. Whether or not she has Down's syndrome, she doesn't understand because she's ONE.

One year olds don't behave badly, they behave like one year olds. Pick her up and distrat her if she's being, errrrm, difficult

Fair point colditz & to be honest at home she's normally OK, all you have to do is sing to her or blow raspberries on her stomach & she's fine.

The main problem is at the nursery, where she's not the centre of attention all the time. As a result she's started to occassionally bite (well suck, as she has no teeth) or pull the other children's hair if they won't give her the toy she wants. Again, in fairness 90% of the time she plays perfectly OK with the other children & her carers always say she's been a sweetheart, but I'm worried that they're letting her get away with things that they wouldn't allow the other children to do because they have a soft spot for her.