Toileting/Soiling

[janetsplanet]

my DD (7) has dyspraxia and possible ASD. She has always been independant. She is clean and dry day and night, but im at my wits end lately.
when she goes to the toilet for a poo, she either wont wipe, wont flush or wont wash hands or all 3. I have been told this is the dyspraxia (planning, sequencing).
She wont always say when she has had a poo, so checking her bum isnt always possible, plus she gets embarrassed. she wont poo at school so it isnt a problem there, although toileting is in her statment.
yesterday morning when getting sorted, i threw her nix in the bin (easier than washing them sometimes) then bathed her. put clean nix on and told her to put the clothes on from the day before. she told me they were dirty, so i looked and they were covered in skid marks. so i got her a clean dress and did her hair, got the washing out and we went shopping.
we got back and she stunk (of poo). i dont know when she had been to the loo, if at all. but it was another pair of nix in the bin and a clean outfit on as you could see the poo stain on her dress. her jammies are also covered in skid marks each day.
i have tried asking her when she has been to the loo but she gets embarrassed and cries.
the question is - do i see anyone about this, if so who? or do i just deal with it. she isnt pooing herself like a toddler potty training does, as in there isnt a log in her pants. just really bad marking

Could she have constipation and this soiling is overflow which she can't help? I'd see GP and see if he thinks she has an impaction.

If that's not the case, how about having a visual reminder in the bathroom of the correct sequence in the form of symbols and words. Eg nix down, sit on toilet, poo and wee, wipe, flush, nix up, wash hands, dry hands. There's a lot to it when you list it like that. She may only need the main things, poo and wee, wipe, flush, wash and dry hands, etc. May also help to use flushable wipes, we do, even though our DS2 is 11! Though have to tell them only one per flush. HTH

I think it might be overflow too...Movicol might help?

she isnt constipated. shes very regular and 'goes' easy enough. we have wipes (when she uses them) its just she doesnt always like us checking her bum. she has been today and let me check her. just if she does go at school and the kids smell her, its not going to be nice. she has no friends as it is. we are back at CAMHS in a week or so. do i mention it to them?
when DD was dirty yesterday, i asked if it slipped out by accident like dioreah does, but she just got embarrassed/upset, so i left it

My DS (11) with ASD has had soiling problems for ever. He still doesn't go unless I smell him first and then send him. He has sensory problems, can't tell when he needs to go and has got really defensive about it all.

But it sounds more like a fairly new issue with your DD, which is why I'd suspect impaction. She will still be going to the toilet past the blockage but sometimes it'll just leak out. She won't be doing it on purpose. Lots of people on here have been very surprised to find that their child has a constipation problem, because they can still be pooing. It's actually the easiest thing to deal with because it can be treated.

If it is sensory and/or behavioural it's a much harder thing to get past. I've tried it all, believe me, Poo goes to Pooland is a good book, star charts for clean pants, or just for telling me when he's dirty, rewards they actually care about can be hard to find. I've come to the conclusion he can't help the skidmarks so could never win a reward, so it was counterproductive. He could tell me when he is dirty, but chooses not to out of embarrassment or fear of being told off. I never tell him off now, but I did when he was younger and I really regret it. It's made it much more of an issue.

I really feel for you, it is/was the worst thing about his autism for me. Don't dismiss anything until you've tried it if possible. You need to get this sorted sooner rather than later. Shame it's a Bank Holiday weekend, they do pick their moments.

hiya, thanks for all replys. this has been a kind of issue forever with the marking of underwear. i just throw them in the wash, or the bin and get on with it. the marking of clothes is newish (apart from jammies) but this week im just fed up of it i think. maybe i am noticing it more because she isnt at school.
could it still be constipation/impaction if there are lumps of poo down the toilet.

god what a bloody topic to be discussing

Where else can you discuss poo on a lovely sunny Bank Holiday? [bugrin]

Not sure about what the poo would look like getting past an impaction? Obviously runny stuff would get by, but I think lumps can, too. Maybe ask in child health as it's not just a SN thing, NT DC get it, too.

ok thanks. what does NT mean?

Oops, getting too used to the abbreviations! NT is neuro-typical, ie 'average thinking' without SN. Someone here said recently "I don't like to think of my DS as abnormal, but he definitely ain't average!"

worth taking her to GP, sometimes GP can tell if it's impaction by feeling their tummy (obv not 100% accurate) and if it is, they can prescribe medication.