sad and worried

[cheeryface]

ds2 having problems

wants to be dead
aggressive
hates himself
defiant and argumentative and nasty to me
school work going down the pan
major flip outs
lying
scratching his own arms
screams and shouts and cries

at times u wouldnt know there was anything wrong.

waiting for appointment.

finding it very hard to cope with all this but

problem number 2 :
dh

nasty , horrible and selfish and cannot make it work with him. trying to not have any arguments as i know it makes ds2 worse. but dh makes it very much worse. he just keeps causing me more problems. he says hes had enough and hes phoned the estate agent.
why does he have to do all this when ds2 so obviously needs security and love ?

ds2 is all for his dad. he goes to work in dh truck with him loads in the holidays. dh brainwashes him into thinking i am the problem.

its a massive mess. i could cope just about with one problem or the other but not both. its too much.

sorry not sure why i am even posting this

I'd like to think that in the interest of your son's well-being, your DH could pull his head out and be reasonable long enough to give your son some security. But unfortunately, some people cannot do that. I am sorry I can't be much help, but please just do what you can to make sure you and your son are okay. Your DH can sort himself out. Hopefully someone can come along soon with some good advice. Hope things settle down for you soon.

cheery pm me please

omg what an awful situation i am sure posters will give you lots of sound advice on here, i hope your ds gets immediate help and hopefully your husband will take a bit more responsibly and help you out.
my heart goes out to you...
its important you are taking care of yourself in all of this because if you run yourself into the ground with this who will look after everyone then, is there any chance a relative could help out so you could have an afternoon to yourself
best wishes to you
x

{{hugs}}

Dd1 is 7 with AS and goes through stages of feeling anxious, depressed and feeling sad for herself, its very upsetting, a few weeks ago she was like it and i couldn't seem to shake her out of it, i posted on here about possible medication for her , eventually (after a few days) she seemed to improve so we did not go down the medication route, she's had bad days sinse but no she's on school holidays it has settled, i think dd will need medication in the future. My dh is not very supportive, if anything he makes dd1 worse (windes her up, ends up shouting at her). Hope you manage to find an answer and support on here. xx

sometimes i wonder if its down to dh that ds2 has the problems he has. dh has alot of the same traits. i am just finding it so hard to deal with , i go from angry , thinking that ds2 is just a naughty selfish brat to thinking hes mentally ill or AS or both and then feel sad for him.
i have posted before about dh and everyone said he was emotionally abusive and i should leave.
but ds2 doesnt need a breakup aswell right now.
i managed to get dh to call off the estate agent. i told him that we would get to the root of ds2 problems first and then we would split and try to make it as painless for him as possible.
i have tried and tried and tried.
nobody seems to understand in RL i imagine its because they havent witnessed ds2 behaviour.
he actually got so angry he had me gripped on monday and punched the back of my legs. hes 12 but what about when hes 15 or 16?
im not even very well myself.
thanx for the replies.