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Original poster

Am I losing my sense of humour or.......

40 replies

jussi · 06/04/2011 09:49

.......am I right to feel a bit hmmm?
A fellow teacher in the school where I work posted a photo of another teacher on facebook dancing comically at some social event.
Underneath was the caption SEN!!! Another couple of teachers commented ha ha.
So my opening question. I know they meant it lightheartedly but oh I don't know.What do you think?

OP posts:
purplepidjin · 06/04/2011 21:58

zzzzzz I'm not at all racist and am not abusive to my DP and his family (who I like an awful lot more than my own, btwWink)

The example I had in mind is a person we both know who likes to trump stories - he always has to go one better, and it's known as "blacker cat" syndrome ie if I have a black cat, his cat is bigger and blacker.

I asked DP if this (married with a family) dude also had a blacker boyfriend... You can see how that is amusing when you know us as a couple but open to misinterpretation on an internet forum.

DP has pulled me up in the past when I have inadvertently used racist language, purely because I haven't known it was racist. I now don't use certain words now I understand, iyswim.

And I don't laugh at the people i work with. However, when you are in a job where you are regularly bitten, punched, kicked, have your hair pulled etc you can't really explain it to people who work in an office or shop. So certain things are only mentioned to co-workers because they're the only ones who "get it", a bit like MNSN compared to MN in general

Sorry I wasn't clear Smile

purplepidjin · 06/04/2011 22:02

PS thank you for sticking up for me, Sign.

PPS Back to my original point - teachers should
a) not have social photos on facebook where parents and therefore pupils can access them
b) not make comments like that in public
c) know that that is wildly inappropriate and offensive

So, after all the palaver I caused (sorry) YANBU and you are well within your rights to point all this out to her line manager!

BialystockandBloom · 06/04/2011 22:10

"However, when you are in a job where you are regularly bitten, punched, kicked, have your hair pulled etc you can't really explain it to people who work in an office or shop. So certain things are only mentioned to co-workers because they're the only ones who "get it", a bit like MNSN compared to MN in general"

That is not the point at all. This is not the kind of gallows humour, or solidarity amongst people in a terrible situation. These are teachers who are using children with SEN as a tool to make themselves appear funny to colleagues.

And I'm sorry, but your subsequent post saying that basically what was wrong was that they did it in a public forum where parents might see it is appalling. Spectacularly missing the point Hmm

justaboutWILLfinishherthesis · 06/04/2011 22:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

purplepidjin · 07/04/2011 12:42

Ok to defend my good name

I am currently in subway with three middle aged guys with various needs. One has no concept of table manners. The only people I can tell this story to are colleagues or in this exception on here. Only my colleagues will see the same humour as I am. I cannot laugh now it would be rude so oi will share the anecdote later in confidence.

I don*kt see that as offensive to anyone and I certainly won't slag Dude off

tabulahrasa · 07/04/2011 12:59

purple - I don't think that's the same though

One of my best friends also has a child with AS and we joke together in a way that I never would in front of other parents, or the children... it's half coping mechanism and half there's somebody who gets exactly what I'm on about and also finds it funny because they're dealing with it too

That's not the same as posting a photo of myself on facebook and saying I look autistic in it because I'm doing something odd (I actually can't think of what off the top of my head, lol)

The first is ok because (and I'm assuming in your situation as well) it's done with no lack of respect towards anyone, or lack of care about anyone's feelings

The second is taking something and making it into an insult - and even worse it didn't need to be, if a photo is funny, it's funny, it would have been just as funny if it said, How silly do I look?

coff33pot · 07/04/2011 13:54

Disgusting end of. If it were me seeing it I would be going in the next day asking for someone else to take care of my DS and that the teach in question should be sent packing or be withdrawn from anything to do with special needs.

purplepidjin · 07/04/2011 13:54

Thank you tabula that's what I was failing to say!

Original poster
jussi · 07/04/2011 15:52

ok,I've decided I'm going to send an email just so they know I am offended and can't go round making comments like that.
Just to clarify, my son is not at this school, it's a work colleague who made this comment.
What is also pretty shameful is that other teachers have commented insinuating how funny.I'm not disputing the photo was humourous but as was said, why then write a comment about SEN.
I'll keep you posted with the response I get.It's a bit weird as I've worked with these people for years.

OP posts:
willowthecat · 08/04/2011 11:32

It's a good idea to challenge it - it's not about humour, it's about mocking vulnerable children in a public environment. Presumably they would be quick enough to complain about people who laugh about 'thick teechas wot kan't reed or rite' - but at least then the joke would be about adults who can defend themselves.

budgieshell · 08/04/2011 19:28

I would be very interested to know what happens next. Do you not have any policies at your school about face book because you should have.

brownie1 · 08/04/2011 22:18

Disgraceful. The problem is I believe that the majority of teachers are "towing the party line". Complain to all that will listen

Original poster
jussi · 26/04/2011 16:51

For anyone who may be vaguely interested, I did nto receive any reply from the teacher in question after I emailed her.
First day back at school today and she has not mentioned anything!!!!! She has been civil to me as I have to her but absolutely nothing with regard to an apology or discussing it or anything.
I thought if she apologised for being insensitive then at least that would be something.
Now I haven't said anything to her as I feel I have made my feelings quite clear and I should leave it at that.But underneath it's actually making me angrier and I would love to know what her response would be if I did mention it.
Makes me laugh really as she is in charge of PSHE (personal social and health education)

OP posts:
Gigglebizmizz · 26/04/2011 17:57

You should report her to the head I remember a while back there was a teacher sacked for slagging off "awful parents" and making some disparaging remarks about them on facebook. The least she could have done was apologise this shows you that she has no remorse and thinks you are over-reacting, what a total cow has she removed offending photo and comment btw?

Becaroooo · 26/04/2011 18:05

Dreadful.

Really dreadful.

Needs reporting IMHO

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