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SN children

Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on special needs.

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Original poster

letter from pead about ADHD!!!!

21 replies

butty · 15/10/2005 09:11

Hi, i got a shock in the post today as the letter from the pead was not at all what i expected.
He has stated that chloe does not have ADHD and that i am noit coping with her behavior problems and has also said that she was an angel in the appointment of which is far from the truth.
There was no mention of the conners report scores and he stated that she was an angel at school, of which isnot the case. He said her learning is age appropriate of which it isnt and that is why she has an IEP in place.
I think i will definately get a second opinion but to make matters worse the dla have contacted him for a report and he has stated that he is sending the same as what i have got!!!!!!!!!!!
This doctor is a joke and i will do my best to get another doctor!!!!
Butty.xxx

OP posts:

jenk1 · 15/10/2005 10:01

oh no butty

i had this for years with ds, from him being a baby i said to various "professionals" that there was something wrong and they treated me as a neurotic mother who couldnt cope with him and kept offering me AD,s.

YOU are her mother and only you know your child inside out, keep fighting for a dx and change the Paed if you have to.

Sending you Hugs

macwoozy · 15/10/2005 11:35

Butty, I'm not surprised that letter was a shock for you, how demoralising. Was that report part of the multi disciplianry assessment, if so did the clinical psychologist suggest a diagnosis as well? Definitely go with another paed, I would ask the school to write a report about their concerns about Chloe as well.

coppertop · 15/10/2005 12:28

I'm so sorry, Butty. No wonder it was such a shock to you. I agree that you should go for a 2nd opinion if you can and get as much written evidence as possible.

KarenThirl · 15/10/2005 13:12

This sounds like a blast from my own past. J's first assessment came back exactly the same (we too thought ADHD at the time, and I believe the psychiatrist who assessed him then focussed solely on that possible dx and eliminated it without addressing other likely diagnoses). We struggled on with J for over a year after that, until I could manage no more and called for a second referral. Within a very short time the new psych said straight away that he appeared to have ASD/AS and that a full assessment would follow.

Stick to your guns. Request a second opinion and stay strong in the knowledge that you know Chloe better than anyone. Good luck.

amynnixmum · 15/10/2005 15:36

Butty

Definately get another doctor. It makes me mad when so called professionals dismiss parents concerns about their children. How do they honestly expect to have a better idea of a child than the child's prents on the basis of a brief appointment.

Ds got referred all over the place when things kicked off at school last year. One of the referrals was to a specialist health visitor. I had 2 meetings with her on my own and then she met ds on a home visit. Her job was to see how we were coping as a family and whether we needed any parenting classes or that sort of extra help. Thankfully she decided that we were doing all we could and that there was no need for her to have any further involvement.

Obviously this didn't help with the difficulties we were having with ds but it was a real boost to my confidence. I think that all parents, but especially those with children who have special needs, give themselves a hard time about not being the perfect parent. Her assesment helped reassure me that we were doing a pretty good job and that ds problems were not down to me being a rubbish parent.

I don't know if they have the same system countrywide but perhaps you could get a referral to a similar specialist health visitor. At least then the paed couldn't just but it all down to you not coping.

Good luck.

lars · 15/10/2005 16:48

Hi butty, I think this is a real problem for us parents with the so called professionals that they appear to take the appointment as the diagnosis without any proper tests, etc. I am still going down this avenue and that is 2 years later and now my ds child phsy now wants a second opinion on his own opinion.

As for the DLA I would contact them and say you are going for a second opinion and send school assessments as evidence and the amount of care your child needs to compared to others of your child's age.
hope this helps larsxx

Davros · 15/10/2005 18:59

Oh dear Butty, how awful. AND it arrived on a Saturday, just proving my theory about them nearly always sending things to arrive when you can't pick up the phone and shout at them! I'd definitely try to see someone else asap, it is your right apparently, not sure how easy it is though unless you see someone privately.

Jayzmummy · 15/10/2005 19:14

WHY DO THEY DO THIS?????????[banging head against the wall emotion is needed]

Im so sorry for you and know exactly how you are feeling.....dont let it get you down. Get the second opinion....you are mum and you know best.

essbee · 15/10/2005 19:18

Message withdrawn

Original poster

butty · 16/10/2005 22:12

Hi thanks for all your messages.
I am going to ring the head of special education at our local social services, and i am also going to call the CDC to see why after 2 years waiting chloe still has'nt been seen by the physc???
My main problem is that know where on the letter did it mention her scores for the conners report of wich was 10 out of a possible 10!!!!!!
I bet they don't divulge this info to the DLA or any other proffessionals.
I wish that the first pead hadn't left as he was in total agreement about chloe having ADHD if not border line aspergers.
I don't know where to go from here and what help i can get other than going private which is why i applied to the dLA as i know she needs 24/7 attention at home and was hoping that it would payu for the private route!!!
I think all is going to go tits up!!!
Any way, thanks again for your support.
Butty.xxx

OP posts:

Original poster

butty · 17/10/2005 13:11

Right i have rung the school nurse regarding this matter and she has told me that there is no way that i can get a second opinion from the school health department as he is the school doctor!!!!!!!!!

Where the F do i go from here??????

I have rung eduaction department and they have stated have you tried the school nurse???!!!!!
Like yeah, but they don't wanna know!!!!

The CDC can't really do anything unless she is referred by the school doctor!!!!

I am running out of options and the letter just made me out to be a liar and totally dismissed any problems concerning chloe!!!!!!!

Where can i go from here to be heard.????

Any help or advice would be greatly appreciated.

Butty.xxx

OP posts:

Prettybird · 17/10/2005 13:20

Can you go to your GP and ask him to refer you/your dd for a second opinion?

Original poster

butty · 17/10/2005 13:47

i have spoken to my Gp and because she is already in the system with the school doc there is nothing that they can do.

The school nurse has just rung me back and i have expalined for the last 20 minutes that i am sooo angry with the doctor for dismissing Chloes behaviour at home coz of the school and asked why there is no mention of conners report scores for home??she is going to see chloes school teacher to see how things are going there and get back to the doctor, although she said i will still wait the 3 months told for the next assesment!!!!
She has said unfortunately these things take time and i will have to remain patient and calm!!!!!!
For F Sake!!!!! I have had enough of being patient and calm!!!!

i gotta move on from this situation and fast, before it totally gets out of hand!!!!!

Butty.xxx

OP posts:

amynnixmum · 17/10/2005 14:58

I know that different boroughs work differently but i'm sure that your GP can refer chloe even if she's already in the system. Last year the school made referals through the school nurse and doctor but I also went to my GP and asked him to refer ds onto CAMHS which he did. It didn't matter that he was referred by different people. as a result just about everyone who could have been involved was involved at one stage.

Original poster

butty · 17/10/2005 15:03

I have been down that route and as the only thing my GP can do is refer to the CDC for the child phsyc, he says that i'm better off with the school lot!!!!
Besides chloe has been on the waiting list for the Phsyc for 2 years nearly!!!!

I'm pi**ed off with being passed from pillar to post, and i have told the school nurse that i am looking into going private, although really i shouldn't have to!!!!

Butty.xxx

OP posts:

Prettybird · 17/10/2005 15:10

I hope amynnixmum's excperince gives you confidence to push for a second opinion.

The only reason I usggested it was that I beleieved that we were allentitield to a second opnion - although it always makes it easier if your GP supports you in this. Make the point to him that the other paed (who left) had been of the storng opnion that your dd had ADHD/berderline aspergers, yet you have had a totally contradictory report for this paediatrician. So understandably, you don't have confidence in that report, so would like a second opinion. Also make the point that your daughter has not been assessed by a psychologist. Tell him if you don't get support, you will having a breakdown and he wil have to deal with that!

If, after all of that, your GP is still not supporting you, maybe you should think about changing GPs?

Original poster

butty · 17/10/2005 15:30

Hi prettybird,

My GP has always been very supportive as he knows myself and family very well from past problems with chloe when she was born and was also the one who pushed a referral to the peads for dylan when the HV said on several occasions that he was just lazy!!!
He knows that times arn't good for me at the mo, but he has said that all he can do is refer to the pshyc she is already waiting for as a matter of urgency and refer to the CDC pead of whom has an 8 month waiting list, so in his opinion the best thing is to stick by my guns with the school health department!!!
He is more than happy to write to the school doc about her problems and the fact that i am on 3 prozac a day + other meds for depression and stress/anxiety plus the fact of dylan's disabilities, but that is all he said he can do, but he wishes he could do more.
He stated that the childrens pead services in this area are very saught after hence the long waiting list, and in the whole of our district there is just the one child phsyc!!!!!

Butty.xxxx

OP posts:

Prettybird · 17/10/2005 15:43

Fair enoguh Butty. maybe you should be writing to your Health Authorityor MP complaining about the length of the waiting list and the impact that that is having on both your dd's emotianl development and your own health!

Original poster

butty · 17/10/2005 15:47

Pretty bird,

I often feel like doing that, but then just something else to stress out about!!!

IE: what if they don't get back to me, what if they don't take me seriously. It would just be some one else for me to get angry with and i'm fed up of feeling angry!!!!

Sorry to rant on!!!

Butty.xxx

OP posts:

PeachyClairPumpkinPie · 17/10/2005 16:30

Really sorry they did this to you- it's so, so common! Do they not realise the heartache it causes?

Sites to visit:

adhd info

brain wave organisation (covers ADHD)

BIBIC

They might be able to help. If not, they're likely to have spoken to countless parents in the same situation and could advise you?

Original poster

butty · 18/10/2005 09:25

Cheers for that info, i will have a glance when and if i get time in the next few days!!!!

Butty.xxx

OP posts:

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