An older sibling being bullied because younger sibling has SN?

[MarioandLuigi]

Has anyone else had any experience of this?

I am off to see the HT this afternoon at 2pm. DS1 is in year 5 and came home in absolute tears on Wednesday. Apparently some of the boys in his class where calling DS2 a 'S**A', laughing because he is 4 and still in a buggy and saying that he always looks like he has been punched in the face. They also asked if DS1 was 'Special' like DS2 and whether DS1 still needed to wear nappies. :(

Now DS1 is a very sensitive boy at the best of times (he has some ASD traits and is waiting for an appointment with the Ed Psych) but this isnt just the usual picking these boys do to him every so often (all the boys are part of the football crowd, DS1 is not) I want the HT to properly deal with it this time. Its even more important now as DS2 will start at this school in September.

What do you think I should say to the HT?

The school must have an anti-bullying policy, and you need to keep emphasizing that your son is being bullied, and what is the school going to do about it.

Do request a copy of the anti-bullying policy as well.....

I think the Equality Act which came into force in October 2010 was supposed to deal with situations like this.

Talk to teacher and HT. Perhaps they can run some sessions on how to be kind, no bullying etc.

Hi, that is so sad and sickening to read. My daughter once experienced some horrible comments at her school about her sister who has quad CP. I put my feelings in writting and had a meeting with the HT who was appauled and spoke to the parents of these children individually. If that hadn't have done the trick (it did) then i was fully prepared to speak to the parents nicely in the playground myself as i feel if one of my children was bullying another child about anything then i would want to know about it so i could speak to my child about it and see that they stop.
Much better if the HT deals with it really though as some parents only see their children as little angels

I really hope they get it sorted for you and your family as schools are supposed to be really cracking down on this sort of thing.

If it was racist bullying, I believe that the teachers are obliged to log it and report it, possibly to the local authority (someone may need to put me right on this one). However, homophobic and disablist bullying are treated as less important and do not need to be logged.

I hope the Equality Act has changed this. How awful. I dread my DS getting bullied for having a disabled brother - I know he's very conscious of being spotted with him and is embarrassed.

(I notice that when I type 'disablist', it comes up on my computer underlined in red - presumably computer says it does not exist!)

Poor thing!
Definitely needs to be sorted by the HT, as this is bullying.

I've not had my others coming home with this yet but have talked about it with them many times over the years, trying to prepare them for this eventuality.

Violet's point about sorting it via the school is good - I have asked the school to do general anti-bullying assemblies before too.

Hope you get it sorted.

Thats for all the replies.

The meeting went well and I actually felt the HT was listening to me (he has a bit of a reputation for being dismissive),he said that he has written to the parents of the three boys involved and that he was having a meeting with them to discuss it on Monday.

I told him that I felt it was an escalation of stuff that has been going on since september, and that they have suddenly found the right button to push. He said the boys would be writing an apology letter to DS and me while in detention on Monday afternoon break. He is going to ahve a word with the class teacher and dinner staff to make sure they keep a close eye on DS1 and see that he isnt being harrased.

So I actually feel quite relieved as it went much better than I imagined. Obviously I dont know if what he has said will actually work in practice so I am remaining cautios but optomistic.

Hope it works out well- at least the head is doing something positive-keep a close eye,though and report any more concerns immediately

I always worried that dd may get some trouble because of ds,but thankfully she hasn't