Ds1 has dropped ALL his clubs and spends his lunch break "Running around on my own"

[coldtits]

Now, he seems perfectly happy with this arrangement, but I'm not. We agreed these clubs so that he could socialise in a controlled and supervised environment, and now he's not controlled or supervised, and I am VERY worried about him being picked on, or even him perceiving himself to be picked on, and lashing out, as he did a few weeks ago.

He's coming up to eight, in year three, has ASD, ADHD, and dyspraxia. I suspect he's dropped the clubs because it's toomuch bother to remember them, although I allow that he may actually need to run around on his own, he says he likes his privacy (yes, he did use that word)

Should I push him back into at l;east one club or should I just leave him to it? I can see him losing the few friends he has if he's running around shouting all through lunchtime, and not interacting with anyone.

does he enjoy the clubs - what I mean is - could it be the idea of going to the club that scares him - or does he hate it once he is there ?

I wouldn't force him to go to too many things he absolutely hates - but I would ideally like someone to help him pluck up the courage to go if that is the only problem.

If it is a case of hating the activities - could it be that he needs some "down time" during break after the hard work of surviving in the classroom environment - and maybe an activity on a Saturday might be better for him?

would having one child to play [easier said than done I know] would be easier for him to begin with than a group?

I agree that a bit of a push out of their comfort zone is worthwhile but traumatising them /pushing them too far will do more damage than good. It is difficult when it is in the middle of the day at school so you are relying on what they tell you rather than seeing for yourself what the story is.

I think he needs to run round at lunch time to de-stress from class. And the clubs are probably adding to his stress not reducing it.

My DS refused to go to 'lunchtime club', and has now made really good friends. Sounds like my DS wasn't as obvious in the playground as your son, but certainly was a lot worse in Y3 then he is now in Y5.

I think let him do his own thing, and make sure the dinner ladies keep an eye on him...

Or at least give it a go.

sounds like my boy he was supposed to go to a club today but forgot , hes asd too no advice but every sympathy

My DD only ever went to a craft club and the gardening club in four years at primary school. One was for a year and the other for a term.

She now does a NAS youth club which she loves and they really do get to run about. Also does Guides.

I tried all the pushing into clubs thinking it would do her good but it made her stressed. I let her pick what she wants and if she doesn't stick to it, I don't push her after the first time of trying it. I spent too long in the early years pushing her to do stuff she didn't want.