Other people's horrid children

[Spinkle]

Gah.

I've just got back from the school biting my tongue.

My DS (ASD) stands in the line and waits for the bell.
The bell rings.
Horrible little kid stands behind him. Said kid says goodbye to his mother. She walks off.
He then pushes in front of my DS and says 'I was there!' My DS squeaks his disapproval but lets it drop.

Grrrrr.
I said to the kid 'Are you sure you were there?'
'Yes' the horrible little bleeder lied. Bare faced cheek!!

Back story to this: he's our ex-childminder's kid. The one who kicked, punched and shouted in his face. Made DS so nervous eventually he refused to leave the house.

I obviously cannot tell him off. I have asked the teacher to keep an eye on him but the teacher cannot see stuff all the time - and the little monkey is pretty devious. My DS doesn't have the required language to complain necessarily.

Ah, feel better for getting it off my chest.

I would have stuck my foot out and tripped the little b*gger up .

Sometimes NT children are so mean , dd2 has this little girl who follows her around all day trying to mother her (hugging her, holding/pulling her hand), i know the little girl means well but dd2 clearly hates it (covers her ears and crys) and however much i tell her (to go away) she keeps comming back for more .

Ah yes, don't you just love other kids.

DS2's best mate at school likes to manipulate him by telling Ds2 he won;t be his friend if he doesn;t do certain things, and not allowing Ds2 to play with anyone else. I've told his 1:1 that I am not happy with this as it makes DS2 very upset. She is aware of the problem.

Sorry to hear that Spinkle. for your DS, but unfortuntely I don't think it's that uncommon.

IME it is easier for schools to ignore the behaviour of these type of children and focus on giving our children 'support'
teach them to ignore with their social skills rather than tackling the negative behaviour of those who contribute to their distress.

I'm ashamed to admit, that I have behaved in a not very adult way over something very similar.

My son has ASD/OCD/Tourettes. He's ten. A couple of years ago, a child was "needling" him in the park. No parent to be seen just this little girl who looked to be about 11yrs old. My son was trying to join in with the other kids and she kept staring him out and making it obvious he wasn't welcome.

This went on for several minutes, and because my son has to learn, I allowed him to continue trying but I moved much closer to offer him some reassurance. It was then that I heard her utter the words that sealed her doom...."go away, you weirdo!" In I swooped. I didn't raise my voice but, I could see from the smirk on this kid's face, she's enjoyed this cruelty so I moved very close to her face, so that I could look directly into her eyes and said, in my calmest and most menacing fashion "I am watching you, young lady. What a nasty little girl you are".

The child almost passed out. Off she ran, crying. Next thing, her mother (who'd been having a smoke, some distance away) came over and was about to give me a mouthful. I smiled, all friendly like and said "must be going" and left.

I must have scared the life out of this child but hey, maybe she'll think twice before she picks on someone so obviously vulnerable as my son, again.

love that story, I wish I had the guts to do that. DD1 doesnt seem to have too much trouble but theres another lad in her class who has asd and the kids and their mothers are just horrible. This poor lad loses control and hit another child and now none of the mothers little let their little angels talk to said boy or his mother.

My DD1 says his not that bad but talk about computers alot. We have said he can come and play here once Im better :)

I must admit - I'd have no hesitation telling off someone else's child if it was before school, so they weren't being supervised by a teacher AND their parent had left (so I couldn't bring it up with them.)

If this is a kid you know well - I would have just taken his hand and moved him to the line place he was. And then quietly had stern words with him.

On a side note - lining up was a real trigger point for my DS because he always got pushed and jostled. So we agreed that he always was back of the line, then he didn't get pushed so much.....

lisad123....that sounds like a kind thing to do.

Hope you're better soon.

And yes, those asd kids DO go on and on and on about whatever their current interest is. It's hard for other kids, I appreciate that. I do find on occasion, the parents are worse than their precious offspring!

slightly off topic as this scenario relates to my NT dtr not my AS son but when she was being bullied by another little girl in her class, I made sure that I spoke to the teacher in front of the little girl (making eye contact) whilst they were lining up, and said loudly, that if my dtr ever came home and told me that a, b or c incident happened again, I would have no hesitation in approaching the parent of the child involved.
I think it scared the living daylight out of the little girl (about 9 at the time) and i can still see her two eyes looking up at me.
cruel yes, but oh the sadistic pleasure it gave me

Ahhhh yes. I'm sure we've all got these stories about horrible little children like that. Of course you have to keep telling yourself that they are just children and i'm sure I was no angel when I was that sort of age. In fact, I know I wasn't.

The point is whether we like it or not, no child under a certain age is really going to understand why your child behaves the way they do. Any child who stands out unfortunately is always going to have to deal with little gremlins like the one you mentioned. Some kids just enjoy the control.

I've just sent a message via face book to ex SIL, DD2 stopped her 11 year old autistic DS being bullied on the bus he doesn't tell anyone about it.
DS[16] doesn't go because of the little shits around here, and DD2 gets bullied because of him.