School transport question

[goingroundthebend4]

ds3 does not like the taxi bus journey to school and its long one about ahour .Know its not being in the car/mpv thats the problem as we often do long trips

Started of letting him take a book but he soon got bored of this as he cant read and the escort does not read either or paticulary interact with the children ( Enlish is her second language and from conversations tried to had its not very fluent)

So ds3 was taking his Ds to play in the car and this has helped but Driver has just said one of the other dc mum that get the car said her sons not happy as he is normally in the back and the other boy sits there.Its not even that ds is not letting others have a go

But from tomorrow drivers asked me not to let ds take his DsI and i so know its going to be a problem WWyd

All conversations are with the driver not the escort due to her poor Enlish and no im not being racist its a statement

Firstly I would clarify what exactly is the issue-why is the other boy upset ? Why can't he bring something to play with?My ds goes on a minibus,they aren't allowed toys,but a few of them have IPOD/MP3 players.Does your ds like music-or if there is a cd/tape player in the taxi is there some music/story tape they may all like- An hour is a long time to sit doing nothing.It is part of the escort's job,surely to at least talk to the children,even if she finds it hard-I would have thought the ds was ideal in this situation and expect your son would be disappointed if told he's not allowed it any more

I wonder if school transport has a policy about these things?

I don't know about DS's on my sons transport, but I do know that other children take MP3 players. Could your DS have something like that - maybe with an audio book if he doesn't like music? I usually limit ds to a comic as he isn't good at remembering to bring stuff home! He's on a mini bus with a dvd player so they will often put something on for the kids, (although it tends to be aimed at the youngest, or is something the driver has chosen like a classical coincert) or the radio will normally be on

the other boys upset as they not got one and that they both cant watch/sahre with Ds .One of the other parenst complained to driver

Driver did not mind as it kept ds happy and quiet but said as other parents objecting that he prefer ds not to take

checked is no offical policy.Ds is only 5.5 so not really bothered about music and dont think he listern to story that long

theres no music or interaction at all.Ds is non verbal and the other two boys have more speech so can talk to eachg other

disapointed ds is going to yell scream and cry tomorrow he does not like at best the journey.No dvd player nothing Ds will just be elft sitting their babbling to himself ;(

I have to say that if there is no policy about Nint DS not being taken, then the other parent is being unreasonable. Your child struggles with the journey, taking his DS has solved that problem, if another child doesn't have one then their parents have three options, explain to their child that they have to leave your ds alone to play on his game, provide something that their child finds interesting or stimulating or buy their child one too. It is completely inappropriate for them to complain to the driver, to bully you into not letting your ds take it anymore. All children, whatever their sn have to learn that they will not always get their own way.

My ds always takes his dsi for the bus
jourmeys.Has done so for 2 years now and it has never been a problem.
hope you can resolve it somehow.
and I agree with everything Sparklerainbow said.

thats the daft thing ds will happily share take turns but the upset comes as one child does not sit next to him

trouble is i dont want to be cuasing upset with the other parents mind not that i see them more than once a year.

Sn wise its speech for the other kids( ds has other issues going ontop of speech ) though there more verbal than ds.So the other boys talk to each other and he is left out but now been taking ds they want to interact more.

I might try tomorrow and let the driver suffer the yells and screams and then talk to him

Good luck.

Well ds came home and taxi driver has insisted no ds as the other two boys had a fight over who sits next to him

my dd came up with fair point that by removing ds I'm punishing ds3 for their bad behaviour which is true

Before he took the ds he was ignore by the other two due to his lack of language so hesback to 70 minutes of nothing again :(

because I'm guessing if I send audio book etc the others will want to share with him .and truth I don't think he be able change if himself either

So to keepeveryone happy and the taxi journey harmonius I'm going to be making my ds unhappy :(

Talk to your local parent partnership, and maybe they could get you in contact with the transport committee. This escort does seem unsatisfactory, as she needs to be able to communicate with the kids etc. It is too much for the driver to have to deal with all this as well. Hopefully they can come up with a solution (play the radio etc.).

I spoke to the transport and thees nothing they can do they dint employ the escorts

Taxi driver just confirmed that before hand the other two boys ignored ds . They had been doing one sits next to him way there other way back so both get turns to help him

but the two other boys had a fight over it

ds has gone today minus his dsi and in complete melt down :(.Am going to talk to the school see if they are willing to explain to the other two parents why he takes it and ask them to talk to their own children about their behaviour

I find it heartbreaking that even in speech unit ds is still isolated due to his problems and think that's going to always happen .Yet he loves playing with other children

it's first time ds has ever been popular even in the speech unit he is still slightly isolated as has less speech than the other dc and because of his Pd he can't always keep up with them.Teacher is trying as she's noticed it to .Noticed that when comes to computers that's when they want to be friends as ds is pretty good on them

Agree with mummytime. Perhaps you could emphasise the safety angle

I see the role of the escort as making sure that the children are safe. If your child us upset, yelling or screaming; or if the other boys are fighting then the driver is going to be distracted. The escort should be making sure this doesn't happen. I would only elaborate on her non communication if pushed.

I agree that the driver's job is to DRIVE-the escort's job is to look after the children- I really don't see why the rota couldn't work-ie: one sits next to him now-one later etc...but I don't think it is your responsibility to keep the other children happy-Their parents should deal with entertainment for their children on what sounds like a very long journey - sorry to hear ds was so upset (but as you say it was obvious he would be) good luck

the fight was before they got in the taxi .I dont think the other parents know that before hand ds was left out of the conversations .Thats one of the downside to transport and his unit so far away is that i cant talk to the parents

I think it's a mistake to look at the other boys reaction to the ds as 'bad behaviour'. Presumably if they are on school transport, they also have special needs and perhaps related behavioural issues. Looking at it from the other parent's point of view, they may have struggles at home getting their kids off ds's and computer games - I know some SN kids kick off badly when they withdraw, and perhaps the parents are seeing school, and transport, as a time when they are not glued to games. The presence of the ds may have kickstarted some behavioural issues for them.

Still, surely the escort could sit next to your ds and interact and intervene and distract. If she is unable to communicate with the verbal boys, then perhaps she is not suited to the job?

i can understand in one way hence why hes not got his ds today.The unit is for dc with s&l problems

My quandry is before the ds both boys ignored him totally and talked to each other and ds was left for 70 minutes with no interaction with anyone and for child that is socialable thats not fair on him and sinc ei dont see any of the parenst how do i resolve it so that they include him

Escort does not have enough english to communicate properley let alone any signing skills thats needed for ds she sits one side of the car another child in the middle and ds on the door side as he need help in and out the car sometime sthe other two boys sit in the back

ok bad behaviour maybe wrong term but how on earth do I explain to ds that he cant take it any more because of the other two boys arguing .when he is quite happily sharing and maybe its selfish but I need to consider ds as my priorty .

70 mins twice a day with nothing to do .no one to talk to is not really fair

should also point out when ds took audio books to listern to there was arguemnts to .

What do you all do or more your dc do on the school journey paticulary thos ethat have dc that are sociable and seek interaction but dont have the language to use

It sounds like they have the wrong escort when DS[16] went by taxi his escort was fab when he was 1-1 he read to him but that couldn't carry on when another child started going so he took his DS to stop him getting stressed as DS doesn't really get on with other kids or like alot of noise he was allowed to sit in the front, eventually he got a MP3 player to put music and audio books on the taxi driver even took it home and put some of his music on for him.He would be still going with them if local authority hadn't fucked up and changed taxi companies. Can you get an MP3/CD player and put his audio books on that
The most important thing in this is your DS I know mine would not of coped for the length of time he was in taxi not having anything to do.

70 mins is a ridiculously long time for a child to be effective isolated in the car. I stand by what I said before, the other parents are being unreasonable here, and the driver is looking for an easy out. Your ds has every right to take something which will quietly amuse him for the journey, and set him up for a day of learning as he arrives calm. The driver and escort have a responsibilty for getting them there safely, happily and ready to learn, the other parents have a responsibility to ensure their children get to school in the best state to learn, they need to be proactive, and not reactive to your ds's DS, and I say that as the parent of 3 dc, one with PD, and as a teacher. This is not fair on your child grtb4. Would you be prepared to speak to the LA transport team yourself, and maybe get schools support?

Would you like to sit for two hours and twenty minutes EACH DAY rattling around in a minibus/taxi with NOTHING TO DO but stare out of the window.

Tell him that unless there is a formal ruling on this, a policy (which you'd like a copy of) then it is not your son's concern how the other parents feel.

I think this comes under the term "twaddle". If they're concerned that their kids want to play GET THEM SOMETHING TO PLAY WITH/LOOK AT/LISTEN TO.

Bloody day's long and hard enough for these children..........you should all be able to reach a conclusion which makes the journey as tolerable as possible for your own kids.

My son's going to a mainstream school with special needs unit next year. We will either have to move house or I will have to drive him and or chaperone him.

And the woman who is "helping" your child (who I'm assuming, possibly wrongly, has some communication difficulties of his own?) does NOT COMMUNICATE WITH YOU (OR HIM) as English is difficult for her? Well, she's not really up to her job, is she?! I'd have something to say on that one as well. It's not racist. I say again........life's tough enough for these kids!

All valid points wendihouse22

I didn't mean to criticise earlier on - just putting the other parents possible viewpoint as maybe they feel their kids are now coming into school in a state, whereas they were once happy to sit for 70 mins. Your DS has as much right to be happy for those 70 mins too so it's a tricky one.

I really agree with others who have questioned the role of the escort. I wonder what the job description is for an escort? Surely a reasonable command of the English language is absolutely essential along with ability to communicate with children with special needs. This is needed to keep children safe and happy.

ItsWIts ok donkeyderby .It's fair point I can see it from their point of view just so tough as they don't see ds being left out

and yes ds has major communication problems ge has no speech the other two have quite a lot more

I have complained to transport but apoarentley escort job is to just travel with children making sure they don't do anything dangerous not to entertain them

school army happy with transport so know though won't be getting contract renewed but school going to talk to the other parents explain a bit better why ds has been taking his ds

Well if the school do that, that would help I hope.

Does beg the question how the escort is going to stop sn children with communication issues from doing anything "dangerous" if she hasn't got the language to communicate effectively with them herself, but may be I am setting too high expectations there. Feel free to shoot me down.