I feel faintly sick now

[purplepidjin]

I just read a thread from a woman who would abort the baby if it has Downs Syndrom - high probability found in early pregnancy.

I now feel sick that a child isn't loved because of this

AIBU?

PS I haven't posted on the thread- it is her decision, after all!

I was aghast(like that word, makes me go all "Miranda")
that "they" couldn't see that dd's cp helps make her who she is, and without the cp she would be someone else.
tbh I think they refuse to see it as it means you can love a person who is disabled,and shock horror accept that you can't change it.
it is like the refusal to see that it isn't "downs baby/child/person" it is person/child/baby with insert syndrome/disability.
makes me fume.
like cerable palsy sufferer "insert person's name"
lazy and bloody ignorant

Has anyone asked that woman WHY she feels she won't be able to cope?

And then ask her what emotionally, practically and financially she thinks she would need TO be able to cope.

The difference between her answer and reality would be very interesting, as well as flag up how woefully inaduate provision is.

I honestly don't think that for many woman it is about aborting a baby because they are not perfect. I think it has more to do with being frightened of having to struggle the way that so many of us do. I wouldn't blame her for that.

I can't bear to read the thread myself though.

While she may be fixing on Ds as a reason to abort.Just how many of us here have dc where their Sn only come to light after they were born or even when they started Nursery

no amount of prenatal testing is available .

As for making a choice I had no idea ds3 would have Sn be disabled .I had 3 other dc with no problems would if I know what I know now change my mind etm nope .

I do tend to think these ate people looking for a rise because how many women really would discuss a termination because most I know including my friend was devastaed she only terminated because her first child died of the dieses at 8 months old but it's not something she tells people

Star, I didn't dare post anything on her thread because I felt I couldn't help but be inflammatory - which is the last thing you need in that position. If you can't say something nice, and all that...

We all have struggles in life, and for some, eg: 2shoes and her DD, those are more visible than others. I have depression and anxiety. DP is black and grew up in West London in the late sixties/early seventies. Overcoming the shit life throws at us is part of what makes us individual and unique. I don't believe in the stereotyes of people with DS, however I never met a person with DS whose company I didn't enjoy! In fact the people whose company I don't enjoy tend to be NT, drink a lot, swear every second word, and think that tracksuit bottoms are an attractive look for a night out in the pub! ??

LOL. I understand entirely. If you watched One Born Every Minute you will have come across Ralph, and excellent ambassador for AS I thought.

He is 18 and expecting a baby. He met his partner on a Social Skills group that obviously went a bit too far

His wishes for the baby is that they don't turn out to be boring, going out and drinking and not interested in learning. I found myself hoping a little that the baby would also grow up with some AS traits, to meet his fathers expectations and because, quite frankly, those expectations are high and desirable.

If you haven't watched it I'd recommend you download it and do. Ralph sobbing his heart out when he first gets to hold the baby was just adorable and probably affects us more because we know that Ralphs journey until 18 will have been difficult relationship-wise, and there he is as a young adult with his own family, - and you just know that he'll become obsessed with doing right for his son.

I can think myself into knots about this issue, but the main issue for me is the human rights aspect of it being legal in the uk to abort foetuses with certain sn right up to birth, whereas the life of an nt (or presumed nt) foetus is protected by the law at 22 weeks. That disparity in human rights turns my stomach, the law should protect everyone equally.

yep discrimination starts in the womb