parties

[devientadventenigma]

Am I wrong in not forcing a child to go to a party. DS doesn't do well with noise, crowds etc.

Of course you are not wrong!

There is no such thing as 'right and wrong' when raising children.

But even if there was... Why would it be right to force a child to do something they don't want to do?

No. Don't force it.

When my ds was little, I thought it was lovely that he was invited to parties BUT, he couldn't cope. Eventually, we would just get a small gift, go for ten minutes to say Happy "Whatever" and then leave.

Now, he just doesn't do them (he's 10, Autism (Aspie) amd OCD diagnosis). It's all too much.

Do what you think is best.

I would agree, you know ds you make the decision. we don't go to parties normally, but went to one recently cos I knew it was only a few kids in a large hall, so he had space to 'get away' also no organised 'sit down pass the parcel games'. But biscuit decorating if he wanted to. and the mum is one of my best friends who 'gets' and loves ds. It was stressful for me, but ds coped ok, and I was glad we went, but I made an individual choice for that occasion.

Ds has been much better this year with parties this year. I read him the usborne book 'going to a party' the bit he liked the best was going home at the end. It was recommended by someone on this board.

We go with the intention of staying half an hour or so but recently have seen them through to the end. The last one he was quite stressed by the end but afterwards he kept referring back to it and was happy.

Maybe just go for a short time and if it doesn't work go home and try again next time. :)

We always play it by ear, dd is getting better but it often depends on the rest of her week, the location, the noise etc...we always try to go but not to many a year only close friends and family. Never been to a school kids party.

Just got ear defenders ready for New Years Eve...we do not like fireworks, even though school convinced her otherwise...we do not!