Please or to access all these features

SN children

Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on special needs.

Am I being unreasonable towards my son's teacher re his use of SATS results to hurt him?

35 replies

Christmasisland · 12/12/2010 00:31

Ok, hope there are enough buzzwords in the title to get someone looking at this! Grin
It is a serious post though, and I hope you can stay with it as I don't want anyone saying I haven't given a full picture of teh problem.
My son is nine and in year 4 in mainstream. He has diagnoses of Aspergers, ADHD and dyspraxia. He is is fully statemented with full time 1-1 help. He has many problems. To make matters worse, he is also under the care of a geneticist as he is srongly suspected of having neurofibromatosis 1, which could mean that when he hits puberty, he could well end up covered in disfiguring tumours with some pretty grim consequences. He is short for his age, can't run properly, ride a bike or walk long distances due to dyspraxia and low muscle tone. He can't write so anyone else can read it, he is so impulsive he cannot attend after school classes, and he also has difficulty with speech clarity due to the above problems. He has communication difficulties typical of autism and has been picked on in the past. . We are told he is 'popular' at school, but he is never invited to play at anyone's house, even though we invite children round, and he hasn't been to a birthday party in two years, despite us paying for children to go the cinema, see an entertainer, have pizza out etc for his party, and my assiduous courting of the parents of children he likes and who seem to enjoy his company. I would say he appears around two years younger than his real age. He is aware of most of the above and it upsets him, especially when he sees his NT sisters having a lively social life, getting certificates at school etc.
I work very hard trying to teach him communication skills, modifying his behaviour and teaching him coping skills. But I also work hard to raise his self-esteem. Like many nerdy aspies, he has always been very bright. He could read fluently at three, and loves books. I have always tried to encourage this and he is proud of his abilities in this area. He is lucky enough to have a great teacher this year, who really seems to 'get' him, but this teacher only does four days in the classroom, and another teacher, who does not seem to 'get' my son stands in.
Now, this is the crux of the matter. My son told me that last week, a girl in my son's class told my son that another child was 'in the red group, and you are only in the orange group .' My son said, 'It doesn't matter' and she said, 'yes it does. It means she is better at reading than you' to which my son replied, 'No, I'm the best reader in the class'. My son tells me that at this point, the teacher intervened, told my son, 'you used to be the best, but now you are only around the fourth best', and then called a group of children to stand around the class computer while he pulled up the SATS results (I assume) and showed them that another (named) boy in the class got a level 3.5, and that my son only got a level 3.
If this is true (and it seems an extraordinary story to make up) I think it is so wrong. For one thing, we were told at parents evening after the SATS that even parents wouldn't be told their own child's SaTS results! So to pass this information around with the express purpose of humiliating a child with pretty severe special needs seems extraordinary to me. OK, you don't want a kid saying 'I'm the best reader in the class' whatever their problems, and I instantly told my son that he shouldn't say things like this, but my little boy has so many problems to face in life, and he has so little to be proud of, and I am horrified that a teacher would do such an hatchet job on his self-esteem. I would have thought saying something like, 'There are lots of good readers in this class, you are all doing really well, we all have individual talents and we should't compare ourselves or anyone else with other people, but just do our best', and then moving on would have been better than this big performance with the SATS results. I am not steaming in all guns blazing, and have sent my son's class teacher an extremely polite email asking him to check the story and let me know what really happened etc - but if this did occur as my son says it did, what should I do? Is it OK for the teacher to do this? And why, if my son is slipping at school, haven't I been told? My instinct is to pull my son out of school and hire a hit-man, but obv I will restrain my instincts! Please help! (and thanks for sticking with this marathon post!)

OP posts:
Spinkle · 12/12/2010 12:27

I quite agree with Goblinchild not only a pushy mummy but also someone who sees the buzzwords and bullshit. Double the threat.

Not only that. DH is a governor of the school.

Triple threat Xmas Grin

Al1son · 12/12/2010 12:54

I think you should also think about asking what this teacher thinks is an appropriate way to respond to boasting in a child with AS. He should be explaining carefully how other children may feel about his claim to be the best reader, why it isn't important that everyone knows he's the best reader and what a better response to the original comment from the little girl might have been. That way the teacher would be supporting your son's social skills rather than making himself feel good by shooting him down in flames.

IndigoBell · 12/12/2010 13:37

Sorry - I meant it's a legal requirement to tell parents the KS1 SATS - ie the end of year 2 results.

Christmasisland · 12/12/2010 14:18

This is all very interesting and I am hugely grateful for your responses. I will let you know what his teacher says on Monday. Yes, very integral to his AS that he would not see that as boasting, just a fact, and it has been left to me to talk about why it is inappropriate etc. in his defence, he didn't start the comparison! Smile

OP posts:
MrsColumbo · 12/12/2010 14:46

Christmas, I found your OP pretty upsetting, and am absolutely horrified that any teacher would humiliate any child in such a way, SN or not - but to do that to a child who sees his reading skills as positive in the face of all the other things he has to cope with is appalling.
So, if this 'teacher' feels that, yes, your DS is good at reading, but is 'only' the fourth best in class, what is he actually doing to help him improve his skills? I am so cross for you; this teacher has been so unprofessional, and intentionally hurt your DS, which is inexcusable.
Good luck with resolving this.

chocolatespread · 12/12/2010 15:13

Sorry, I don't have any wise words, but I would like to say, 'YANBU!!!!'. I found your post really quite shocking, tbh, because I suppose I like to imagine attitudes are improving. Practices like this seem archaic, more akin to twenty years ago. I find it hard to imagine that any trained teacher would think this was acceptable behaviour.

You sound like such a lovely mum, btw.

Christmasisland · 12/12/2010 20:54

ah chocolatespread, your last line just made me cry! You have all been so kind and so helpful. I was telling my husband this afternoon that I had posted here and you had all really helped me. I do know my little boy can be really difficult, but he's truly a lovely, unusual little chap. Very kind, adores babies, wildly affectionate and loving to his family, fabulous sense of humour, the BEST hugger. I am very protective of him. I hope I can sort this. Had battles before, this might be another one. Deep breath!

OP posts:
Al1son · 12/12/2010 21:09

Good luck with the battle. Please let us know how it goes x

StarlightMcKenzie · 13/12/2010 00:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

bullet234 · 13/12/2010 10:31

Your ds was stating what he believed to be a fact, that he was the best reader in the class. Of course whether that was the case is a different matter, but if your ds is like I was and am in this respect then no boasting or malice would have been intended. When I was 11 I was getting changed for PE and put my vest on inside out. A PE teacher said to me "you don't care what how you appear to others, do you?" in what I realised years later was an attempt to embarrass me. I believed she was just asking a question and so honestly answered "no".

New posts on this thread. Refresh page