How common is is to have more than one child with ASD?

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Hi everyone

I was just wondering because so many mumsnetters on this SN board seem to be saying my ds1 and ds2, both with ASD etc. I hope i'm not coming across as ignorant, it's just that I have a daughter who is possibly on the spectrum and I desperately want her to have a sibling. I suppose I just wanted to know the facts before we went ahead. I didn't realise just how genetic it was until I came on here.

All experiences and opinions much appreciated.

Thanks

I have two dc with ASD, a son and a daughter. I discovered I was pregnant with dd2 when ds1 was diagnosed. I had some genetic counselling and was told the stats were I think 1 in 1000 (may not be accurate I am remembering five years ago now). Having said all that dd2 is very different to ds1 and is less severely affected. It is a very difficult decision or was for us, especially in the situation we were in. Obviously I adore my dc's, but I can't pretend it isn't bloody hard. Good luck

cansu-thank you

I've been wanting to start this thread for ages, but I desperately didn't want to offend anybody who has more than one child with ASD. I'm not saying that I still wouldn't go ahead with having a sibling for dd, but I just wanted to be prepared I suppose. I just wonder why this is so genetic in particular.

What exactly is genetic counselling?

I think it was a kind of attempt on the part of my GP to help me understand the risks of having another dc with ASD. TBH I was very distressed to be pregnant and newly coming to terms with ds1's ASD. I wasn't sure if going ahead with pregnancy was right - I was in a mess! I met with a doctor from Cambridge who specialised in genetics who talked me thorugh the evidence so I could make a decision with the facts and statistics in front of me. I think it was a necessary step for me. In the end I decided to continue with my pregnancy, but I am firmly of the belief that it is a personal, but hugely difficult choice. (I may also offend people - I hope not).

I have 2 DDs, one has a dx of Autisim and the other is going though assessments at the mo, but there is no doubt in my mind she also is effected.
It is hard work but weirdly enough because I have never had a NT child I dont know any difference, its just how our little family is.
We have choosen to not have anymore children for a number of reason but one of those reasons is because of further children having ASD.
I remember someone banding around the 70% chance a while back but no idea where that number came from.
In RL I know of 4 other families with more than one child effected by ASD

Hope this helps and no im not offended in the slightest

Thanks for replying. It does help.

Just realised though that I messed the title of this thread up. Obviously meant 'is it', not 'is is'. Oh dear, i'm losing my head.

My 6 year old twin DSs both diagnosed but again both very different - my 8 year old DD is not on the spectrum and NT. We have also been for genetic counselling mainly to try to discover genetic component (if any) of DS2's various other physical difficulties but also to try to help DD when she is older to make a decision about having children.

My DD aged 5 has ASD but so far DS aged 1.5 shows no signs so maybe NT? However both step DCs, adults now, have severe ADHD. We started the dx process for DD shortly after DS was born but I would have still gone ahead. I worry I dont know how to raise a NT child!

I have 2 children. They both have autism.

I'm no expert but I am fairly sure it's genetic.

We originally wanted 3 children, but we decided no more. We were worried the 3rd would also have autism but more worried that he/she wouldn't. We have no clue how to parent an nt child and felt we couldn't cope.

I THINK I have one with, one without. Ds1(7) suspected AS. I always knew there was something wrong. Ds2(2) is only young, so it is possible that I could be proved wrong. But I don't think so. I think he is NT.

I have two NT children and DS3 moderate-severe ASD. There is no hint of ASD in our families at all. It came out of nowhere. The only thing I can think of is that we were older parents by the time DS3 came along. The current thinking is that there are lots of autisms and some are genetic and some less so but have other risk factors eg age. I like that my NT children have each other and we were lucky they came out in the order they did as I don't envy your decision.

My son, daughter, niece and nephew all have severe autism.

Me and my sister are also on the spectrum, shit happens I s'pose.

Certainly wouldn't have another child, it wouldn't be fair on them

I have 3 DS's, DS2 (4yo yesterday) is just starting out on the road to a DX of an ASD. He has no self help skills and is very Hypotonic.

I am unsure as to whether DS3 (2 at the end of the month) is also on the spectrum to a worse degree than DS2 or if he is showing learned behaviour from DS2, but I am meeting with the HV in Jan to discuss him.

And HV has mentioned DS1 could also be on the spectrum, I think if he is, he is only slightly effected, he is perhaps a little too nervous of meeting new people, and has a very very slight speech problem, so slight in fact that I thought he had gotten over it, but apparently not according to the HV, but he has self help skills are all there, he will grow up to lead a full and happy life, I've no doubt about it.

TBH we had decided to stop at 3 before anything came about to do with ASD, but the fact that it is seeming more and more likely that all three of them are on the spectrum to some degree, I think it would put me off having anymore.

I can't remember where I read it now, but IIRC every child has a 1/1000 chance of being on the spectrum, and their siblings are 75 times more likely to also be on the spectrum. Think it could have been NAS I was reading?

^^ I thought the incidence of ASD was 1/100. And definitely, if you have one ASD child the probability of having another greatly increases. It was explained to me some time ago by the Consultant Child Psychiatrist and Psych who originally diagnosed my son (AS). Although not proven, there is every indication that there is a strong genetic link.
In our case, we had our dtr before we knew our son had AS - although his behaviour was becoming more and more challenging. Enough so that it was a prominent factor in our deciding not to have a much wanted third.
My dtr is nt so I do have experience of parenting both an ASD child and an nt child. People tend to overlook the needs of the nt child in a family like ours as life has been pretty difficult for her.

We talk about this almost every day. It is such a difficult decision to make. Our dd is 3 and asd, I am 37 and dh is 45. We have thought about having genetic testing done but to be honest i'm not sure whether it would have any bearing on whether we have another child or not.

I never wanted to have an only child, we desperately want her to have a sibling, a playmate, someone she can turn to when she's older for friendship, help, just normal family things. But we are worried about our ages and whether or not we could cope.

We've talked about adoption too although not sure what the age limits for that would be.

Good luck, I definitely know how hard a decision this is.

Thanks everyone. It definitely seems to be a mixed bag of experiences.

Eloise-I didn't realise you could have genetic testing. I'm sure that's rather expensive isn't it. Can't imagine that being available on the NHS. Not sure if i'd want to do it or not actually.

As far as i'm aware nobody in my or dh's family have ever been diagnosed with autism, but since all this started i've definitely recognised some autistic behaviours in some of dh's family, which I used to just put down as poor social skills and sometimes just immaturity. I see things differently now. Dh agrees, which is terrible because he somehow thinks it's his fault. He even suggested a sperm donor! I'd rather not have another baby atall to be honest. Every month i'm terrified I could be pregnant and every month i'm disappointed that i'm not. What do you do with that?

I have 2 children with ASD, one who hasn't shown any signs of it (4yrs old), and one who is too young for us to be able to tell yet. So far there are no signs.

I did worry a bit when i was pregnant with DS1 because I already had a nephew with autism and my brother, uncles and grandfather on my mum's side all definitely have/had something going on, even if they have no diagnosis. It hadn't even occurred to me at the time that the same could be said for me.

Anyhow, he was a very difficult baby and toddler, but I was pregnant with DS2 before his 2nd birthday and didn't get a referral until DS2 was about 6 months old. We'd already decided that 2 was enough by then and took steps to ensure that about a year later. It was already looking like something was "up" with DS2 by then and we knew we couldn't cope with any more children, given the fact that the odds were pretty much in the favour of autism.

I have one with ASD (high functioning) and one without. My 2nd is nearly 3 and I'm positive he is completely NT. We are thinking of having a third and I am worried about managing if the next one has ASD (DS1 is incredibly hard work compared to DS2)

I have one with aspergers and one NT. They are very good for each other! Certainly with respect to the aspergers, I think I can look back over several generations of both families and see little characteristics, ironically which in isolation in previous generations were sometimes used as positive strengths, or at least endearing quirks, that have tracked their way down to ds1. In his case, he had such a variety of those characteristics all cropping up together that he simply finds it harder to turn them from weaknesses into strengths. Ds2 got a luckier set of cards and has turned his characteristics into strengths (eg he is obsessional and stubborn, but not prone to unhealthy obsessions, and doesn't have self care issues, either...).

I think I would be a much sadder person today if I hadn't gone on to have ds2. Even if ds2 had turned out to have AS, too, I think I would have been happier having another go at it! HOWEVER, this is said from the perspective of someone who has no previous history of ASDs or AS in the family, and a ds1 who is clearly not at all severely on the autistic spectrum (if it's possible to be "severely" on a spectrum!), so I was fairly confident the chances of it happening again but more severely were actually pretty low, and knew I would cope better the 2nd time around with a child similar to ds1 if that happened.

Hi, i have 2 dd's and 3 step children. Both my dd's are on the spectrum (one with ASD and one with AS), 2 of my step children have ASD traits but no dx. We had dd2 before we had a dx for dd1. We have decided against having any more as we feel there is a high risk of having a child with ASD and by having another child with ASD the other 2 would suffer.

We were told by dd2's pead that 'if you have one dc with ASD you have a 30% chance of having another dc on the spectrum', 'if you have 2 dc's on the spectrum you have a 60% chance', i'm not sure if this or true or not .

Thanks again everyone.

I can't understand though, why people are being given different satistics.

I think that's why I posted this thread before I started googling etc. I knew I was going to be given different 'facts' which were just going to confuse me. I wanted to hear real experiences from real people.

I see dd with her cousins, one of which is still a baby and she's adorable with them. She loves the baby to pieces and is so gentle with him. I get a lump in my throat everytime we see them together and I just think to myself "come on, just do it". I really believe she'd be a brilliant big sis, but I suppose it's how dh and I are goint to cope if we do have another child with the same problems. When dd is having a good day it's easy to look at the prospect through rose tinted glasses. It's time for the magic 8 ball I think! Only kidding obviously!

I think you just need to go for it , you have one dc with ASD and there is a small chance you could could have another with ASD but there is a risk with every pregnancy that the child may have a disability. You will cope if the child has ASD because you have too. Both my dd's are very different, dd1 (AS) was a night-mare as a baby but dd2 (asd) was really easy even though her autism is more severe, i still find her easty now compared to looking after a nt child, yes she has bad days and has meltdowns but we get through it.

Also having dd2 has helped dd1, they are best of friends, if one of them has a bad day at school or is struggling to make friwends they will allways have each other.

I think the reason why the statistics are so different is because no one really knows how Autism can or cant be passed down or why it occurs at all.

I was told that if you have one child affected then the chances that subsequent children would also be affected were 1 in 30 for a girl & 1 in 10 for a boy (developmental paed) - given that everyone has been told something different I'd conclude there is an increased risk but I'm not sure how great it is.