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SN children

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Original poster

Reminiscing

15 replies

eidsvold · 25/08/2003 19:09

Just been thinking that this time last year I finally got to take my little one home from hospital after three weeks and finally felt like a 'mother!!' I was also scared witless - she had medication and an ng tube for feeding and an apnea (?) monitor... now I am surprised how I managed - I guess knowing that other mums out there had more to cope with than that!! and knowing that I had to...

I just look at her now and that seems like so long ago... just a year.. time really flies when you have kids....

OP posts:

fio2 · 25/08/2003 19:57

know what you mean eidsvold time does move quickly, but you should be proud of yourself because you have had alot to cope with this last year and you've done great

doormat · 25/08/2003 19:59

Yes it does eidsvold.
My ds had a ng tube and apnoea monitor. He was on oxygen (only tiny amount) but I decided to keep him in SCBU until he was no longer on oxygen.I was too scared at the time to come with that aswell.
Now years later, my ds is really coming on.More and alot more than what the doctors first thought but I am so proud of him as he is just a little fighter and proves them all wrong.Like all the other children on here, they are just marvellous.

MABS · 25/08/2003 20:27

Hi Eidsvold, you've done so well over the last year, but you never forget the early days do you? My ds is coming on so much at the moment I can't believe it . Take care.

jasper · 25/08/2003 23:28

As someone once said, "the days are long but the years are short"

Jimjams · 26/08/2003 08:08

It's amaazing how much they can do in a year. you don't notice day by day but when you think back.....

Original poster

eidsvold · 26/08/2003 10:17

I'm glad to see that I am not the only one to feel that way.

Did anyone else have a baby in SCBU - I felt removed from motherhood as such until she came home and was 'mine' to look after.... I guess it wasn't helped that she was taken straight to SCBU from theatre. I got to see her but not hold her - my husband managed to have a cuddle. I did not get that 'rush' of maternal feelings that I have heard others talk about.

OP posts:

doormat · 26/08/2003 10:30

eidsvold my ds was in SCBU for the first month of his life but I had very strong maternal feelings.I held him when he was born and then a couple of days later.He was in a incubator for a couple of weeks.It was such a hard time on all of us but most of all him. I could only go and see him 4 times a day as I had the other children to look after aswell. I used to go and see him when they went to school, come back pick up other ds at nursery, go back, come home to do the tea and see the other kids home from school, go back with kids to visit, come home and then go back late at night when kids at home were settled down.
The day he came home the banners were flying.He was at home for 3 weeks and then he was rushed in with another apnoea attack and he spent another month on a childrens ward.This went on for 12-18 months in and out of hospital.Touch wood he has only been in hospital for tests since and only for a couple of days.

MABS · 26/08/2003 19:03

Both of mine were in ITU Scbu on ventilators for the first weeks of their lives. With muy dd, now 8, I'll be honest and say that i did not want to get close to her as i was sure i'd lose her. But no - in the long term i think we 'bonded' though i hate that word.

With ds, there was, ironically, a fair chance of losing him on several occasions - but they couldn't keep me away !!

Original poster

eidsvold · 26/08/2003 20:37

I spent a lot of time with her when she was in SCBU and held her as often as I could - even kangaroo care etc but I really did not feel like a mum until she came home..

OP posts:

fio2 · 26/08/2003 20:42

My dd went to SCBU, but only for a few days nothing compared to your experiences, after the birth because she had a dusky episode. I had had to have a GA so I didnt come round for ages and the complications surrounding the birth meant I saw a quick glimpse of her before going to the ward and I was unable to see her for a few days after. I do think in my case it knocked my confidence as a mother and I did feel quite useless and the dragon lady who was looking after her didnt help matters.

Original poster

eidsvold · 26/08/2003 20:54

I must admit some of the nurses were brilliant and others scared me - usually takes a lot to do that - but they seemed so unpersonable (?) and unapproachable.

Fio that must have been tough for you.....

OP posts:

slug · 27/08/2003 14:26

The sluglet was in SCBU for a week. It was horrible as I couldn't hold her, couldn't breastfeed and spent the whole time sitting next to her, missing out on meals and sleep.

Original poster

eidsvold · 27/08/2003 15:46

I have an two memories that really stand out from dd's time in SCBU - the fact that if I cried - ( day 4 - just confirmed ds and hormones all over the place) it would be noted on the parents visit section of her charts. Last time I cried in public.

The second one - a father was visiting his son in SCBU - baby was fine really - about to go home next day - just needed to be in SCBU for some blood sugar monitoring - mum was diabetic... he was in a normal 'egg box' no oxygen, no nothing - mum could do what she wanted - feed, hold, bathe, change etc. The father says - is he always going to be like this... is this going to be a problem his whole life - okay does not seem so bad when reading it but the tone he used was horrified, disgusted etc. In the humidicrib next to his baby was a little baby - very premmie who was fighting to survive and dd across the way who was also having a hard time of it - I almost smacked him in the mouth and told him to shut up and be thankful for what he had...... ( okay perhaps the hormones were still raging) I have never had to control myself sooo much...that was the only time I was thankful for one of the nurses who just was very abrupt and matte of fact in her ways. She basically put him straight in a very no nonsense way. Me I was still counting to ten.. or was it a hundred.

OP posts:

ThomCat · 27/08/2003 16:00

My memories of SCBU are actually good ones. Alright Lottie was in glass high sided cot and had drips here there and everywhere and all sorts of other things and I couldn't pick her up for a day or 2 at all and then when I could not without setting off alarms and stuff, but overall the nurses were all SO lovely it wasn't THAT bad. I'd sit up with them most of the night and was in there all day and they were the kindest, sweetest people. They all doted on Lottie and even then I was getting huge compliments about how alert she was and how sweet natured and good etc. I know SCBU is never going to be 'nice' as such but my memories of the 5 days spent there aren't bad ones thanks to the kindness and support we were shown, but I do realise that it was never a case of touch & go with Lottie she was always going to be OK and come home soon so it was easier for me in that respect. I felt sorrier for all the other Mums who could only visit their children at least I was able to stay in with hr and spend all day and night with her.

Caroline5 · 27/08/2003 20:54

dd1 was in SCBU for 10 days on drips and ng tube due to low birth weight. She was basically fine but they were being cautious. I just remember hours of breast pumping in a little room with no windows and endless worrying. Most of the nurses were brilliant.

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