DS's behaviour at home has deteriorated, mostly anxiety related I think as he's very uptight. He's having big problems with changes to routines or expectations, even very minor ones. His adhd symptoms are off the scale when the meds wear off. His teacher (who I believe) says he's fine at school, meaning he needs a lot of input but he tries hard and does well with her. Other activities are all causing massive tantrums, but then he seems to enjoy it, and says afterwards he was glad he went. He's just starting music therapy, and I've got some after school care sorted so he spends less time with dd, who triggers many of the outbursts.
Family circumstances have altered lately although in a good way, it's the Christmas run-up and his lovely teacher is retiring so we do have reasons. He has loads of autistic features but is very verbal and extrovert, and we've given him lots of input. And he's finally had the ADOS but was having a very 'able' day and we'll wait ages for a result which is likely to be equivocal. Though the doctor may then increase his ritalin 
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I feel and look crazy spotting things that 'aren't there' to others. Even letting the dc play is hazardous. I had settled down to the idea that the non-classic adhd issues were due to an asd of some type. But there's no point trying to convince the senco till I have something to prove I'm not imagining it all. And now I have to wait ages and probably fail to get a diagnosis that I really think he needs. AArgh. Sympathy and / or strategies welcome, or even a kick up the arse if you do think i'm imagining it.