Preschool are 100% sure DD2 is ok

[lisad123isgoingcrazy]

Had a phone call for preschool advisory teacher, they have completed assessments and there is nothing wrong with her.

Patronising cow even saiD "well this is a multi agency assessment you know so you do need everyone opinions even if they dont match" and "shes doing so well you must be so proud" and the one that really made me was when I mentioned her SN preschool had very different ideas of DD2 her reply "well yes thats not a normal setting though is it as all the children have social problems so its nto a true picture of her is it? this preschool is"!!!

Shes refused to let me have a copy of assessments until tuesday, when assesment day is weds

I have a feeling im going to be fighting tooth and nail, as I now have to deal with her report and 2 of the nursery nurses (overkill me thinks)

Oh according to her she make approiate eye contact (never has this been the case) and was interacting with adults and playing with the other children. So clearly every child with ASD must stay in the corner rocking

I could just cry

Write to her RIGHT NOW clarifying the contents of that phone call. Clearly you are going to persue this. Clearly you will have a case for educational negligence when it is found that your dd DOES have difficulties.

Write all the points 'to clarify' that she said x. Clarify that you desputed their findings (important in case her own write up of the phone call suggests you agreed with her etc.)

So sorry lisad. Fucking morons!

Dd3's school said she makes good eye contact!!! I would love to know when cos she has never given me good eye contact.

Record everything lisad as stark, says make sure you record that you are not happy or agreeing to their so called findings.

are you in St albans by chance justabout?

Its so mad at them, how they cant see it. We had report from specialist SALT this week that states:
echolalia
jargon
repetitive language
did not seem aware of therapists even though she sat next her thoughout the session
self directed behaviours
refers to self in 3rd person
spontaneous interaction with others is limited
copied imaginative play without extending and very repetative
hand falpping
tip toe walking
clumsy and awkward

She was only there an hour and first time she met her! how is it shes been at preschool since spet and they see none of this behaviour?

The HT /senco at Dd3's school asked me a few weeks ago how we know Dd3 doesn't understand some aspects of language, can't read facial expressions, has poor ToM etc...

Errr because she has been tested by a professional and the report landed n your desk a year ago, That how we know.

The biggest problem lisad IMO is that some school staff think they know about children when actually they know f...all.
Its not that they can't see it, it is that they don't look!!

fired off this email, hope it wasnt too harsh:

Further to our conversation today I feel I need to write and confirm a
number of things.
Thank you for taking the time to see J at B today and
completing the forms.

I do feel this has been rather rushed especially as we knew back in
September that her CDAC was in Nov and this has therefore lead to me being
unlikely to recieve your report until the day before the CDAC or until the
day of assessment. This has meant I have been unableto discuss this with
you at length. I also was not given a copy of forms completed today and
again wont receive these till Tuesday either.
Im sure you would agree this isnt best practice when working with parents.

We are of course very proud of how well J is doing and the
improvements in her speech, however J's dad and I do feel there are
still issues that havent been addressed within the Preschool setting.
I do not agree with your comment that T is not getting a full picture
of her due to other children in the setting having SEN.
While I do agree that we need all agencies input in the assessment, it is
my opinion that B are not seeing Js difficulties in the same
way that we, T and her Speech therpists are.

I feel alot of these issues will be discussed in the CDAC, but do feel
that B need to be better informed on how to use J 5 hours, 1
to 1 support as they have told me they dont feel she needs it and dont
quite know how to use it.

I look forward to reciving your report next week.

Yours Sincerly

LisaD123

Not harsh at all.

For goodness sake. Surely a child without SN is going to stick out like a sore thumb in a roomful of kids with SN?! hopefully the CDAC will give a lot more weight to the views and observations of people with a lot more experience, who know what they're looking for, such as the SALT and the SN nursery teacher.

And leonie, the accent thing is laughable. DH and I have different accents and use different words, as do many couples who don't even cross national boundaries in their origins. The only person in the family DS1 doesn't understand is my FIL, as he speaks pitmatic and is a little bit slurred after having a stroke some years ago and even I struggle to understand him at time!

justa Sadly for Lisad, I know her County very well.

No it isn't harsh, but I would do a bit more of a transcript. (and you can send this on top of that email)

i.e. I am writing to you to clarify the discussion we had today on the telephone to ensure I understood correctly and to have it in writing to remind myself in the future as I found some aspects of the discussion quite upsetting/disturbing/alarming/confusing/bullshitting.

Can I clarify that you stated during this phonecall that there is nothing at all wrong with dd, that her SN preschool have got it wrong due to ...... and ...

Can I also clarify that I mentioned to you that I have many concerns about dd, but that you dismissed them due to .....

You know, that kind of thing. A bit transcripty.

The preschool Autism service is massively stretched. There is a strong drive to delay dx until it becomes an over 5's problem as they get better funding.

Having said that, Lisad can have my Autism Outreach person if she wants. She's very good, very professional, but a bit stuck in the assumptions about autism, which to be fair do apply to the majority and could be helpful to anyone other than my ds.

it wasnt the autism advisor, I know her already from work but the SN pre school advosry service.
I think I will see her response to email and see if i need to be more forward.

I know lisad but there is almost no service to refer her to if she DID have difficulties, and the funding for support comes out of the preschool advisory service' budget.

thank you loads, I hate all this, I guess i thought maybe it would be easier this time round :(

thanks Leonie, hopefully next week workd outs for both of us :)