OCD type traits in ASD - how best to manage?

[kerpob]

My DS2 has dx of ASD and SLD. I notice increasingly over the past few months he is starting to become more and more "OCD like" in his language and his behaviour - most of this is just harmless stuff I can live with, like wanting to always sit in the same chair at dinner time, asking me to use the same phrase when I give him something - however some of it is becoming more difficult and impacting on the whole family. My question is, should I "give in" to the increasing need for routine because this in some way gives him comfort and helps him feel more secure with all the chaos that must be going on in his brain, or should I try to help him break out of the strict routines, (because truthfully I am fearful they will increase in frequency and in lots more different scenarios). Any thoughts?

God I wish I knew. We're also going through this at the moment....

We're trying very hard to strike the balance between giving in to reduce his stress and not giving in because it impacts everyone else, and I feel will just feed off itself and become worse and worse.

I think there will be no end limit. The more we structure his day etc, the things he will wish to be structured....

But I also want to reduce his stress so that he can get the most out of school and life...

yeah I know exactly what you mean, its a really tough one. Anyone else found anything that might help?

Not really. We have it with DS (6, ASD) - especially at bedtimes - for some reason he will not tolerate certain toys in his room (they change everyday). We let him move things around for a limited time only.
I think it's an insecurity to do with transitions between things.
In fact, his reaction to transitions is getting worse.
School find that he has a meltdown if anything changes.

I went on a course where they recommended trying to limit it because if you don't you can end up with endless rituals. I think you have to compromise and let him have some things, such as sitting in the same chair at the table, but not others.
It sounds easy to say it but it will be hard work. You have to decide which things are not going to be tolerated and which are. Good luck.

You are right, if you don't try to stretch 7 bend OCD type behaviour it will become stronger.
The ususal rule applies, pick your battles, but we try to mmke small frequent changes to break routines that are coming too controlling. When it was taking us an hour to get ds2 down the hallway becuase of his compulsion to keep returning to touch the stairs after every couple of steps forward we had to do something.
We tried limiting time spent touching, making him take just one more step before allowing him to go back but TBH in the end we had to ban the use of the front door, only going in & out of the back door for a while.
Just putting some space & time between ds2 & the opportunity to carry out the compulsion was enough to help.
We can us ethe front door now, he stil tries to sneak a touch of the stairs but we are very firm.

thanks for this - will choose my battles!

I think there's a difference between 'rigidity of thought', which is a feature of ASD and OCD which is something quite different.

The rigidity of thought is a benign condition and just part of being on the spectrum.

OCD is a mmental health issue as it's obseesive and compulsive. the reason for the compulsions is usually an inner feeling that if you stop doing something then something bad will happen. Hence DS never eats the last sweet in a packet to ward against evil.

The obessions also serve as a comforter to distress.

The OCD is also instrusive and prevents the ability to read fluently as it makes him go over and over the same passage or to count words in a sentence etc.

That's how I see it.

Rigidity of thought I just have to put up with.

OCD is something he takes medication for.

Good luck!

Wow - that's a great insight.

Thank you for that