Obsessions

[Spinkle]

Would be grateful if you could share your experiences of this with regards to ASD.

With my DS (6) he has a thing about DVDs. Not the actual film but the trailers and the extas on them. He remembers exactly which things are on each DVD.

But this obsession seemed to make him frustrated and anxious - he took them in and out of the boxes and they got so scratched up they didn't work anymore. So we removed them from the house.

Anybody else have this? I'm happy to foster any obsession he has really, but this one felt like a punishment!

Mine does this, and has done for years, but it meant that he took excessive care of the DVDs and always put them back in the right place and in the right order, and learned how to polish them and repair minor scratches with Brasso and such.
Does your son not make the connection between loving the DVD and needing it to be handled in a certain way?

Nah - he doesn't take a great deal of care with anything really!

He doesn't go around breaking things he just doesn't see muck (like most men!) and his nintendo ds is usually covered with kiddie goo....

That said he likes the house to be reasonably tidy but that doesn't usually prevent him from messing it up.

Maybe we might need to work on this!

I think obsessions often feel like punishments? Because there's always something that can go wrong, and they want it to be always perfect...

My teenager has a room full of boxes and containers, neatly labelled and in order. His bookshelves are loaded, alphabetically-ordered and in subject groupings. He has a cleaning box so that important items can be polished and de-grimed, or buffed and oiled, and his finds from a range of sources are kept in another container until cleaned. He is an obsessive collector of certain items, I found appropriate storage was the best way to go.

DS1 has a thing about jigsaw puzzles - if allowed to, he will do them all (covering the floor) and then get very upset if they are moved/ touched. Problem with that is his 22 month old brother! We also have massive freak outs if there is a piece missing. But like your DS, he hasn't made the connection that if he put the puzzle away carefully, then the pieces would still be there.

He also has a thing about his DVDs - DW and SJA, and Singing Kettle - he doesn't mean to wreck them, but likes to look at/ hold/ carry about the packaging, so in 6 months it gets destroyed

I think in the future if I buy him DVDs I am going to make copies and keep the original, so he can destroy the copies but we'll be able to make more.

Crunchy, that's interesting about the jigsaws and not wanting them to be dismantled. Ds1 has always done this and I've always wondered if it was related to his ASD.

Whenever he's made/built something (used to be really complicated wooden train tracks that covered the whole ground floor , but now its mega-block towers, lego and pictures on the magna-doodle) he cannot bear anyone to touch them, let alone take them to pieces.

We had to agree that all specific lego kits, could be built and kept on a special shelf, but everything else has to be put away before bed. He will only put things away if we take a photograph of them first though!

Dh let him keep an extra-tall mega-block tower overnight when I was ill last week and its been a devil of a job, involving several melt-downs, getting him to take it down. It wouldn't have been so bad if he hadn't built in in the middle of the floor in the bedroom he shares with his brother and in such a position that you couldn't actually open the door and get round it with it starting to sway perilously.

DS has an obsession with cards be it playing cards, top trumps, yugioh but if I try to put therm away he goes berserk, also star wars he can recite all the films off by heart and has a room full of collectibles DD1 painted one his walls with the monopoly cover 5 years ago and he has stated if he leaves home he is taking the wall with him.

Oh yes - we've got the jigsaw thing too!!

Mind you - I put him to work in my classroom and he found all the ones with missing pieces (we threw them away).

[hwink]

Ah yes

DS does the jigsaws, trains lined up, lego, etc all out in a certain way and freaks out if they are moved or a piece goes missing.(This was a nightmare when I used to childmind - now it's just me and him at home it's not so much of a problem).

He also likes DVDs, particularly the bonus material but will learn a full film script very quickly. I do say I will make copies on my laptop when I buy new dvds but I never seem to get round to it.

Does stuff have to be 'just so' before they'll settle down to sleep at night?

DS has me taking random things out of his room if he takes against them. The items seem to change all the time. Tonight it was Buzz Lightyear...

Yes, we've been there. Still are, actually. ASD and OCD are closely linked, run quite happily in conjunction with each other, I am told by my son's behavioural professionals. My son is nearly 10. From a young age he liked to line stuff up, usually in size order. He would often wake in the night and, had I dusted his room in the day and moved something 2 inches one way or another, he wouldn't settle til I'd found out what it was and put it back PRECISELY where it was before!

Now, years later, he has been diagnosed as having additional OCD. He's a very bright boy. Mainstream school with Statement and help but the poor thing spends so much time with his various check lists and anxiety that his actual learning and education have had to take a backseat.

Anyone have a problem with not being allowed to throw things away? DD2 (7) is terrified of things going in the bin. Old toys I can cope with but now it's bits of packaging and even food. Once food has gone on her plate she either has to eat it or get someone else to eat it. It cannot under any circumstances go in the bin. This means she will sit for as long as it takes to finish food she doesn't want or like. I have to say we'll keep things til later and put them in the fridge then chuck them when she's not looking and hope she forgets.

We have drawers full of clothes she won't wear because of sensory issues but can't bear to give away. She had a 2 hour meltdown because I insisted on taking about 6 pairs of socks which were too small and she couldn't bear to wear anyway. I had to hide them from her as she scoured the house.

She even worries about deleting words she's typed into the laptop when she's doing her homework. If she's typed it then it has to go into the work somewhere.

Ds1 does a similar thing Al1son, but not to the same extent. He can't bear to get rid of things though and I'm afraid we've resorted to telling him we've put whatever it is in the loft so its safe.

I don't usually advocate lying to children, but its the only thing I could think of that he would accept and we had to do something because of the amount of anxiety he had about it all.

The latest thing to "go in the loft" was an ancient and very tatty desk which was my sil's when she was small. It was totally unsuitable for his needs, so we took him out to choose a new desk and got one he liked. He was really pleased with it and excited ... then we got home. He realised it meant his old desk had to go to make room for the new one (we had already explained this to him) and it was instant meltdown. We had to promise that dh would dismantle it and store it in the loft for when he grows up. Its not even flat pack, its an old 1950s desk.

Thank you moosemama I am really glad to hear I'm not the only one who's resorted to lying! I am usually quite critical of people who don't tell their children unpleasant truths but I've reached the point where I can't bear any more upsets.

We too put things 'in the loft' and hope they get forgotten. Unfortunately DD2 has a fantastic memory and there are a few toys which went missing years ago that she still asks after. Dreading the day she realises!

Please Help! My daughter is diagnosed Aspergers/Dyspraxia/OCD Her rituals /OCD at nightime are destroying her & the rest of the family. Her bedroom has literally nothing in it no curtains, drawers etc, the more I remove things, she seems to find something else that is a problem. It can take upto 4 hrs for her to "Line-up" her bedroom, she has of late started hurting herself cos she is sooo frustrated and tired!
I have yestereday spoke to CAMHS and have been told I will have to wait to see if see is capable of having Cognative Behavioural Therapy. Have spoke to her consultant also and said I have real problems, she could only offer diazepam, or she told me to take her to A&E and tell them I couldnt cope an request a pyschatrist do an assessment, that was the only way we could jump the waiting list. Does anybody have any self help tips , Iam desperate and will try anything..
Her 5 yr old sister is now mimicking (I Hope) the same rituals at bedtime. Thanks

Missmoocher, I would repost this as a new topic, as a lot more people will be likely to see it and be able to offer some help.

I'm afraid I don't have any experience of OCD myself, but my ds (also ASD poss Dyspraxia) is having cognitive behavioural therapy via the Ed Psychs.

We called the emergency helpline at our Ed Psych office on the advice of the assessment unit. They called me for an initial consultation (about 1 hr over the phone) the next day, then took his case to their review meeting that week and it then took about 3 weeks for them to assign an Ed Psych and start the process.

He is initially having 10 sessions involving CBT and these will take place at school.

They did say that a lot of children with ASD struggle with CBT, because they aren't self-aware enough for it to work, but that if they have an assigned adult or even better one at home and one at school (in our case me and hopefully a TA) to work with them then it is often very successful. They are going to call me after every session with ds to discuss what they are working on and what I need to do to help.

I think for me, if my dc was self-harming I might resort to the route suggested by your consultant, especially if there is no sign of any help on the horizon.

Like I said though, if you repost, there are probably a lot more experienced people than me here that can offer you much better advice.

I really hope you manage to get some help for your daughter and family soon.