Anyone else feeling extra insecure about having to rely on the government?

[TheLifeOfRiley]

I have been so worried lately about being at the mercy of the government for help, so much so that I have just done an entitled to check as though DS was NT, as I fear losing his DLA and my Carer's Allowance and it has literally been keeping me up at night that we wouldn't manage without them.

Have just checked and we would survive but we wouldn't live, would have just enough for food heat, bills, etc and that would be that. No room for emergencies, things breaking, redecorating, xmas, birthdays, etc.

I hate living like this but can see no way out. I actually miss working but even though DS is now at school I still cannot find a job as no suitable childcare for him in terms of wraparound school hours, and even if i found an elusive 10-2, term time only job I would also need it to come with an understanding empolyer who wouldn't mind me being off for appointments, meetings, etc.

Sorry for my whinge but I feel a bit down and stuck today, and wondered if anyone else was feeling the same way?

Were in the same position. :(
Havent even got DLA...still doing the forms but if were turned down Im not sure what we will do. DD is happy to stay home all day but its not helping her social skils or obsessive routines. Were just getting by, I owe money to family and cannot even think about xmas. It was DDs birthday yesterday, had to make cutbacks to get her a gift. The fridgefreezer is on its last legs, I fixed our washing machine, the car broke (hence the loan from family) and now my microwave has had it. Our family income has just dropped, DH is job hunting but only 1 interview after 100+ applications and he was too qualified!

We have DS (1) as well as DD (5) so im also stuck on the job front for now.

...However Im trying to stay positive! :) Enjoying the park, museum, home cooking, art and crafts.....tough times all round.

Oh I'm sorry woolytree, it is hard isn't it! I agree with making the most of things, we do have fun cheaply and DS rather luckily won bowling tickets in a school raffle so we are going to do that as a big treat this afternoon!

Are you a member of your local freegle (freecycle)? You could place a wanted ad for a fridgefreezer, a lot of people get new ones in the run up to xmas, you never know you might get lucky!

woolytree have you tried family fund as they help with stuff like that

My heart goes out to you all. I am not in this situation and hope not to be. I was as a child though - strangely enough in the last con government. My dad died and mum was left on her own with 2 kids and a part time income. I know now that she worked her backside off to keep her head above water. TBH at the time we really didn't notice. She still kept the home 'normal'. She must have made a lot of sacrifices herself as i didn't really see massive changes. We still played and ate, got told off, got into mischief.
The hard part is for you unfortunately, your DCs will come out the other side none the worse for having less.

Auntevil, it is not the material things that I think my children will miss. They might whinge about it etc. Like you say, the DCs will come out the other side non the worse for having less. It is not having the necessities that worries me - the things he requires because of his disabilities, and the things we need to replace because of it. Eg. he left a jumper in the loo on a day out - we did not know cos he just zipped his jacket back on and we only found out when we got home; the camera is missing becaue we left it out on the table - big mistake, the bed needs to be replaced cos we have mould growing on it - too many jugs of water poured on it over the last couple of months etc.

I try not to think about the cuts but am looking very closely at finances etc. It is depressing and I thin this Christmas will be dependant on my bargain hunting skills.

I used to be in freecycle where we used to live but got fed up as we never managed to get anything. I may try again, new city and all.

OOOhhh, bowling sounds fun! :) There is an bowling alley about 10 mins walk from us but I havent ever taken DD as she would tantrum too much, we walk past it a lot. Got her swimming birthday party on sunday though, super excited. You get the teaching pool for an hour with toys...DD has waited months to try her flippers...central pool wouldnt allow due to health and safety?! Anyway it was very cheap and avoids the usual trauma...noise, crowds, interracting, and we can take DDs favourite foods for after. :)

I heard family fund could help with driving lessons? Was going to apply so we can at least get out a bit more, it takes ages to get anywhere on public transport, even to my mums and DD can be very slow/distracted.

My Mum offered to put finance for the FF in her name, buy now pay later etc.

Im facing the DLA forms again tonight. :(

The DCs are handling things well...DH is not!

I think that's what i meant - the kids don't know what has to be replaced. My lot don't yet have any idea of how much everything costs just to exist - let alone live. The stress is all on the parent - as if there aren't enough stresses as it is.

I just have no faith in Social Services. They just like to refuse to help people and families.

Do you really think that? I know there are lots of incompetant or ignorant workers about, but there are lots of good ones too.

'they just like to refuse to help' is an odd thing to say.

You must have dealt with lots of different authorities in different area to make such a claim, have you moved lots?

I'm keeping a very close eye on all the new documents that come out on the Treasury's website and commentry/analysis - knowledge is power. There are a lot of clauses which are very rarely mentioned in the news, but designed to protect the vulnerable. E.g. the new HB reduction from flats to shared rooms for under 35s - disabled people are actually exempt from it if they're on middle/higher DLA.

It looks like my family will be fairly safe for the next few years at least. I plan to make sure I know all of the facts so I can fight back if they try to take away anything we're entitled to.