I recently posted on here about forgiving my 11 year old DD for her ASD behaviours and found some brilliant advice and support. So I am taking the plunge again asking about the shock of a late diagnosis of AS.
I may be in the wrong place, but the tumbleweed is still blowing across the empty plains of the SN teens section. (Why does no-one post there?)
Its the second day of half-term and already I cannot cope. I just can't stop crying today.
My DD's ASD has become more and more apparent in the last 2 years and we got dx in the summer.
Today she is like a pre-schooler and wants to do messy play. She is making a mess with paint and plasticine, whilst chanting nonsense words to herself. When she gets to the end of this session she will throw herself around the house and hurt my younger DD for something to do. I will be left with the mess, but I let her do it because she is enjoying it.
She has no social life and is only happy when left to play computer games for hours. This goes against everything I ever believed about bringing up children - but it is the only way to get any calm into the house.
It seems like everyday I am shocked by her problems and lack of maturity. I used to receive compliments on how well behaved she was and the primary school teachers were always enthusing over the quality of her schoolwork (G&T for literacy). I thought she was a bit eccentric but over time it has killed me to watch her become totally rejected by her peers. I feel I have been judged and found wanting too as I am the weird girl's mother and must condone her scruffy appearance/strange interests mustn't I?
I can't get over the shock of who I thought was my DD for ten years and who she actually is.
Her behaviour is just getting worse and worse and I am so shocked that she cannot even manage the most basic of hygiene skills (shocking finds in the laundry bin). She used to be able to keep herself clean. What happened? How will she cope when she starts her periods?
I know the SN boards on here are brilliant for practical advice - battling through the systems that we find ourselves in. I hope I can be forgiven an emotional outpouring amongst such practical people as the mums on here.
At night she reads her baby books and Topsy and Tim and I am shocked. This was the time I expected things to get easier as she was growing up and at secondary school. I never expected this level of regression.
I am so jealous of the posts I read on here where people find out their child has an ASD whilst they are at nursery. The shock of not knowing this was coming is more than I can cope with today. I never knew it would get that I can't leave my DCs alone for ONE SECOND unsupervised.
Sorry for the long post. I just need to type this before I explode.