Now I know WHY.........

[StarkAndWitchesWillFindYou]

the IEP is rubbish, the school are refusing to engage, they have secret meetings, they won't allow our ABA tutors in, the Speech and Language Therapist doesn't return my calls, the EP refused to communicate except through the post etc etc etc.

I spoke to the SEN Case Officer on the phone just now. She said 'oh dear, well, since the statement isn't working, shall we have a statment review?'

Fgs what is the matter with them.
Wouldn't life be lovely if these people tried to work with us instead of against us. Ho hum, back to reality.

Hopefully the county/borough SEN Officer will go in for the review and shake things up a bit.

The school are not doing their bit and they should see that.

Spinkle They want a review because they want to take away all the goldstar (albeit currently failing him) provision.

They promised the HT if she went to tribunal for them then she'd only have to fund the 1:1 for the first term and then if she deemed it necessary could apply for exceptional needs funding (which she has no guarantee of winning even if she did apply).

So the LA tried to say we should have a review in November to set the provision for after Christmas (and therefore taking away much of what was won).

Well, we complained that the provision has only just started and so will expect a review in March, not November.

So now they are being difficult and when I complain, suggesting we have an immediate review. Buggers.

Makes my blood boil when i read this.
It's all wrong!!

Star, you are an inspiration with how you keep on going and fighting.

Hope you can sort this out soon. Hugs. x

geine Please don't be disheartened. I think in many ways I'm my own worst enemy.

I went from thinking 'hang on, that's not right' to asking questions which quite frankly raised more questions. Then I asked those. The more I asked, the more fobbed off I got and the more I challenged.

If I had just been given the fortnightly SALT that I was asking for, I would never have gone to tribunal and got weekly.

Now I know how flexible the system is when you push, I am less likely to accept the weekly without question. I want to know what is happening at the weekly session and keep my beady eye on whether THAT is right for ds, so I;m cross that the SLT isn't speaking to me iyswim.

My ds has outstanding provision, particularly when compared to what many other children get. You could argue that others lose out as resources are limited, but actually I believe the more demanding parents can be (not shouty, but demanding of accountability and evidence-based practice) the better and more efficient the services will be for all.

It is why I cannot just accept 'what' we have got. I want to know 'why' and 'how' and it is quite frankly disgusting that these people don't appear to know.

My ds is doing okay. It isn't much down to what we have won but the journey we have been on. Services are still failing him, but overall he isn't being failed.

I KNOW that ds will not be left alone in a toilet with soaked trousers etc. I KNOW that he will not self-harm unnoticed. Okay, I don't have him learning at the pace he could and should do, but the things I have just mentioned count massively and there are many people on this board still in those pits struggling to get out.

I sometimes wonder if I come across on this board ungrateful for what I now have, but the truth is I am now in a position of strength and to keep on the fight for ds, even still is fighting for the rights of all children, and if I have the energy to challenge dodgy practice then I will do in his name.

Please don't ever YOU give up because of what I write. Most people would be everso grateful and over the moon and overlook the things I now get picky about.

I guess we should never have to feel grateful because it's about our children getting as close to having a level playing field as possible. So unless we can see everyone trying 100% to make that happen, why would we feel grateful? One of my biggest bugbears is when people tell me that my son, with his full time 1:1 plus extra hours funded for liaison/ differentiation plus SALT plus OT plus autism outreach etc. etc. is 'lucky' and I should be 'grateful'. They can fuck off. It's not luck; it's pure determination to get his needs met and he's not lucky and I'm not grateful because neither of us chose for him to have autism and no provision can ever truly level out the playing field .

ANYWAY what route you going to take with this? Go for the review early and try to nail down some of the procedural stuff you want to happen or hold off?

No, I'm going to take the bull by the horns and insist that our ABA tutors go in. I can demonstrate that that can solve ALL the problems that I am complaining about.

They'll refuse of course, but I haven't yet played my MP card and I think I have an argument that will win him over. To refuse the MP or at least not answer convincingly why our tutors can't go in on a volunteer basis for a trial period will be very difficult.

I've got to use him for something anyway, given that we are going to move out of the immediate area. I'd been holding this one in reserve for well, now I guess.

Star - this is disgusting. You've fought long and hard for this provision and your son deserves every iota of it.

I am continually stunned by how badly you've been treated.

I can cope with incompotenance, I can well and truly understand it and forgive it. But it's the deliberate lying (and in your case politics) that I can't forgive.

( I mean I can't forgive the HT / SENCO and Teacher who deliberately lied to me :) )

Knowing you - you'll come out of the statement review with even better provision than you went into it with

'Knowing you - you'll come out of the statement review with even better provision than you went into it with'

That made me smile. Unlikely to be true but still.

Wouldn't it be funny to call their bluff though?

Oh yes, I'd love a statement review because it's clear to me that you aren't able to meet his needs - that ABA tutor I claimed would be necessary, clearly is

Well, that is exactly it Indigo, but I absolutely know it won't happen. I have contacts in the same area that are having absolute hell (how I was treated was nothing compared to them) because the LA is SO opposed to it. It's like an extremist religion or something.

LOL, Eclectic Extremism!!!!

how about inviting the school help to observe your home ABA programme?

When I attended some of the PEACH training one of the consultants said as school refused ABA shadowing they had the 1-2-1 observing at home on daily basis.

I've been inviting people weekly since we started. They won't come in case we put an ABA spell on them or something.

NOT ONE single person has come and we have invited practically the whole personnel of the LA!

you are not putting a spell. They do a home visit anyway do find out about the DC challenges and way the parent/therapist deal with it. They look at the statement and read SLT and OT recommendations, ABA is nothing but a therapy!