Running off/refusing to walk

[henryhsmum]

Hi

Just wondering if anyone has any advice about this. My DS is 4, nearly 5 and has ASD. He is driving me mad when we are out as he either won't walk or runs off and when he does the latter he is almost as fast as me! It is at a stage now where I can't go out with him without my partner as I can't control him or carry him as he's too strong now.

How do other parents of ASD kids deal with this? I am finding it really limiting now as even simple things like a supermarket can't be done on my own

I a struggling with siilar y D is four but the size of a five year old and has delays so behaves ore like two a lot of the time. I find it so hard to know what to do and end up picking her up or using the buggy which I know isn't great but I a at a bit of a loss too, she tends to ust lie on the floor if she doesn't want to move and she is ust too heavy to carry really now.

Sorry thats not very helpful is it! Soetimes briberyworks for Dd, or what couldnt cope without is her icro scooter, soeties she wil scoot but oter ties she stands on it and I hold her hand to pull her along.

Ah sorry so any typos, that should say micro scooter.

Not ASD dx, but behaviour is very similar. I can't take DD1 (4.10) out with her sisters (3.2 and 18 months) because her 18 month old sister still needs a buggy, and I can't control DD1, keep DD2 safe and push a buggy.

We have to use either a crelling harness or her Maclaren Major buggy, which we got from Wheelchair Services.

Sorry, no tips - when DD1 won't walk, she won't walk. When she sees something she likes (a stone, a leaf) she will just go for it impulsively, no thought or knowledge of danger.

Main thing that's helped me: the Blue Badge. I still can't go many places on my own with ds, but can go more places because I know I can park near places and make a quick exit if necessary. He is now 9 but just as impulsive as ever and has phobias e.g. dogs which mean that he can just ruuuuuuuuuuunnnnnnnnnnnnn and he has no sense of danger when he loses it. But being able to get him away when he does really helps my confidence in taking him out.

Oh yes, I forgot to say that. DD1 has a Blue badge. It is vital for us. We go to church on a Sunday, and we simply don't go if the French Market is on, because we can't park on the double yellow lines opposite the church.

DD1 has just been uprated to High Rate Mobility, although I am waiting on a reconsideration for the start date, so fretful that they may reduce it to LRM.

You can get reins for older kids (sorry, don't know the link, but I found them by googling). At least that would help the safety issue a bit?

The refusing to walk is a bigger problem. DS sinks to his knees, always has, and at 11 he's too big to sling on my shoulders!

So we've had to resort to a wheelchair. We are Lou and Andy - DS gets wheeled to the park, then runs around like crazy.

As used2bthin (me too, used2 x) says, bribery can work - I've been known to dangle a biscuit just out of reach to encourage DS up the hill out of the park.

DD just grabs his hand, makes a lot of noise and runs him up the hill - he loves it!

In short, don't feel bad about using a buggy - and get some support. When I go out with DS and a carer I feel like Madonna. I get to do all the nice bits!

Wish I could drive!

No guarantees that this will work for everyone. In fact I know it won't, but you might like to give it a go.

We worked on ds following the basic instruction 'come here'. We did it over and over many times a day. Every time he did it correctly we would hand him a sweet. If he didn't do it whoever was in the room that didn't say it would take him to the person giving the command.

Soon he followed it. Then we did hold hands the same way, and gradually extended the time spent holding hands for the sweet.

Then we went out for a few paces in the street like that and gave the sweet when we got back, still holding hands and kept building it up. It took quite a while but we were persistant.

Again, not even pretending this will work for you. I really don't know and with asd (and probably other disabilities but I don't know enough about them) it is all very well cracking these things but something unpredictable or if a fear is triggered can mean chaos, so even we don't have it fully cracked.

Worth a go though.

Waiting on wheelchair services and a maclaren major buggy for our (tall and proportionally heavy) 3 year old ds.
I did try getting him walking over the summer. Ended up with ds in meltdown, stranded in the middle of a forest 15 min walk from the car where the buggy was!
not funny at the time but did illustrate that giving up on the buggy wasn't a great idea!!
Buggy indefinately might not be the most idea solution ever, but if it gets us out as a family or on our own imho it's worth it

:-p meant he's heavy, but as he's tall he's in proportion not proportionally heavy [duh]

I got DS a Maclaren Major buggy from wheelchair services but I am trying to get him to walk without it as they frightened me a bit by telling me he would need a wheelchair if I didn't manage to improve his walking!!

My DS just seems to have an urge to run as soon as he's out of the house. It is a shame as we have some lovely woods right opposite our house but tbh I am frightened of taking him in them on my own.

One thing I am trying and this may sound extreme is a dog! Basically, I found out that dogs are used as autism assistance dogs and Digs for the Disbaled are running a reserahc/trianing programme for families that want to use a pet dog to help their autistic child. They have told me that it almost always stops the running off. So know we have this labradoodle puppy. The first time DS walked her he held the lead and was good but now today the thrid time he just dropped her lead and ran off and then we tried to make him go in the right direction lay down and refused to move! he is a little monkey and he very quickly works out any bribery I use like 'you can go to the playground etc' and plays up the next time.

I think of all the aspects of the autism the running off is the hardest to cope with.

AHHHH!

Excuse terrible spelling, I'm tired!

P.S. I'm not suggesting you all go and get a dog - so far it hasn't really stopped DS running off. On the first walk I thought a miracle had happened but experience today showed he very quickly lost interest and went back to his usual self. The poor dog is only a puppy but it is as good as gold on the lead and it even sits and waits for DS.

Early days, henry!

I'm interested in this. Our dog always sticks to DS like glue when we're out in the park, so if he did run off, the dog would run from me to him and woof a lot.

I haven't tried ds holding the lead though. Might give it a go (once we're in the park!)

You can get something called an ezy lead. Basically you put a harness on the dog and you have a normal lead on its collar which you hold. The ezy lead attaches to the harness for DS to hold. With the autism assitance dogs they have a loop that is attached to the harness around the child's waist and if the dog senses the child trying to run off it is trained to lie down to stop them doing it!! Sounds brill but unfortunately the assiatance dogs are very hard to get which is why they are running a scheme for people with pet dogs

Have you read the book 'A Friend Like Henry'? It's about a family with an autistic son who basically used the dog for communication and for out and about.

There's a few clips on You Tube about the family. They even made a film about it called 'A Friend Like Thomas'

We got a pup to help our DS. DS was about to start school full time and I felt I might need some company in any case... DS pretty much ignores the dog. But she is now my baby Cairn cross she is and a sweetie.