If you had the chance to talk to a group of NT children and parents about SN children what would you want then to know?

[TheArsenicCupCake]

I have the opportunity to talk to a large group of pre teens and teen and their parents about SN and bullying and what life as an SN family is like.

We've worked really hard to get to this point and I'm getting quite excited :)

it is going to be as a group of children who are the bullies or indirect bullies .. And will concentrate a little on asd.. But..

I would like to know what you guys would like to put across in terms of educating these dc's and their parents. :)

If I can change just one families attitude it will be worth. While.

So what do you want to tell them?

A lot of bullying is fear of the unknown. It's also down to differences and how they are explained at an early age. My DSs go to a MS school with a disability base. They also have a good % of AS and ADHD pupils too. This is totally normal for them - they all rub along together well. But recently on a bus and they spotted someone who is a little person (dwarf? - don't entirely know the differences myself) and laughed and pointed. It's how you explain that everyone is born differently - and all of us with different talents. I think on a more conciliatory note perhaps you should ask them that if they don't understand - ask.

Have a rule that if someone is sitting in the wheelchair (if you get one) being pushed people are only allowed to talk to the person doing the pushing. It used to drive me mad if I was pushing my friend (had a physical disability only) to the shops and people would talk to me instead of her. If they asked something about her I would just pointedly ask her exactly the same question and let her answer.

Am I right in thinking these kids are 'bullies' and their parents are 'inadequate'? If so, do they have a choice about attending, or have probation/ school / social services etc 'sent' them? As far as I know, there are two main types of bullying: powerful in-group v 'other', and the hitting out of the isolated playground reject.

I'm just wondering if the YP and their families may have more experience of being labelled & stigmatised than you might expect, and if it's something you could tap into. I read somewhere that 50% of young offenders have undiagnosed ADHD or asd... and that sounds about right.

Yes this group have been causing quite serious issues to others.. They do have a choice about attending.. And they are a group who use the group power balance.
The idea is to use education to establish positive peer pressure amongst the group.. ( basically to split the hard core from the followers.. But to educate all of them).. Parents are invited to attend to see what we are trying to achieve and to hopefully support us and their children ... I wouldn't say that it's overly inadiquate parenting tbh.. I know that a good percentage of the parents have really tried.

And it would suprise me if we have some ADHD, ASD or ODD amongst the group...
This will be the one of the last stops for some of the kids before the end up in the 'police system'.

It's not just our family who are speaking.. There are other agencies involved as well .. All of us trying to steer them toward a more positive path.
Some hopefully will take us up on the chance.. I know some won't.

Wouldn't suprise me*

don't stare

Tell them anyone can give birth to a disabled child and some of them might be going through this experience in the future, either with their own children or their grandchildren.

Hi Arsenic

I'm not sure if you updated on this and I missed it...Have you done your talk yet?

How did it go?