Bum wiping problems at school...what can be done?

[genieinabottle]

Sorry it's a bit eeek, but i don't know where we stand on this.

DS (ASD, coming up to 5 in 3 weeks) isn't wiping his bum nor waching his hands at home unless we are there to do the wiping for him and prompting and supervision to wash his hands.

I have told school, and it is in a couple of reports too. (he is on action+ btw, not statemented)
Trouble is i thinking he goes to the toilet and no one helps him. Cue we have had a few days pread out since he has started school of dirty pants and dirty bum (sorry if tmi), which also tells me he probably isn't washing his hands afterwards.

This evening again he had dirty pants on, and his bum was (boak) and it's looking quite red too.

I know school don't change nappies for dc who are not toilet trained yet, unless there is a statement in place...etc. And i'm aware DS' problems is different as he will take himself to toilet but simply needs help.

Is there anything i can do about this?
I don't like the idea of DS walking around with a dirty bum and pants all day at school.

Thanks in advance for advice.

Ahem....is it in his IEP?

Seriously, I think that the DDA covers this quite well, and schools aren't allowed to neglect the needs of children who have delayed maturation because of SN. However, they can't know about something that they don't know about, IYSWIM, and presumably your DS isn't actually telling them? I think that is quite common for a Year R child.

To be honest, given everything else that is going on, I think I would opt for

a) sending in a small bag with a change of underwear, and a note in the home-school book that you have noticed DS isn't wiping after bowel motions, and you have put a change of underwear in his bag for any accidents. Also ask that they check verbally that he doesn't need help, etc.

b) send a brief email to SENCO, explaining the issue, acknowledge that you know it is a common issue for Year R children (ie. don't make a huge 'this is his SEN' song-and-dance) and ask what they normally do with Year R children who don't wipe properly.

c) keep a diary for Statutory Assessment of every time he comes home soiled.

d) check his bottom each afternoon after collecting him and apply sudocream if necessary.

But that is only MO.

We have the same issue but so far have only come up with a detailed visual support to put on the back of the toilet door; trousers down, pants down, sit on toilet, poo/wee, get toilet paper, wipe bum, pants up, trousers up, wash hands, dry hands....you get the idea. The teacher doesnt 'like' our suggested support...'its to complicated' She thinks visuals should only be used if all dcs use them! [hangry]

We made two copies so DD uses the same system at home too...Im hoping this will help.

x post with Lougle...we have spare clothes at DDs school but she wouldnt tell them she was dirty as she wouldnt recognise it...only if very very wet.

Thanks, Lougle i will follow your tips to the letter, it sounds like a very good way to approach the issue.

Woolytree, we also have a toilet, hand wash pecs routine sheet on the wall in the bathroom at home, but he still needs reminding and help.
Although it helps to give him the visual clues, he still needs prompting and help.
Ant somehow i can see our school saying the same as yours if i dared suggesting this to be used at school.

I send my DS a change of clothes and a pack of baby wipes - much easier for him to clean himself up.

I was just going to say can you send wipes aswell as all the other stuff people have recomended. Dd3[8] doesn't wipe herself at school even now. I have tried putting wipes in her bag but she forgets to take them to the toilet with her. Sometimes she says there isn't any toilet roll. Although I think she would say that even if there was.
It makes me to think that sometimes she is sitting in dirty pants and won't tell anyone.

I'm sorry to ask this (I'm new to all this malarkey!) but could I ask what type of SN your dc have?

We suspect dd (8) has (mild) Asperger's and she comes home with dirty pants having not wiped. I just wondered if it was connected?

Ds2 (AS and chronic constipation) is soiled most days atm and he refuses to acknowledge it making it a tricky subject at home because he is embarrassed and secretive about it. He knows it's not nice, but genuinely doesn't realise he needs to go until it's too late.