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Original poster

Ds has been smacked by his escort. . What sort of action should I take ?

40 replies

ApocalypseCheese · 11/10/2010 22:36

This is the second time i've had an issue with an escort, there was an issue earlier in the year when dd was left alone for a few minutes, however, no harm was done and and the issue was resolved.

This time it's ds, different escort service entirely.

They only started in september, he's been at the school four yrs and except an issue at the start (which was resolved by changing bus) has had no problems.

Since going on this new bus (at start of term) he has had three extremely violent outbursts, he can be violent but most incidents can be avoided.

We've had an issue with her before, basicly she's quite 'shouty' and has a very high pitched tone, following an incident at the start of term has barked orders at him morning and afternoon (red rag to a bull time) for minor things such as touching the key hole on the bus Hmm

Also, the bus is very small, only an 8 seater and that's with two extremely large escorts and a driver, ds is asd and does not 'do' confined spaces.

I had found her attitude a problem and whenever I tried to broach problems found her very 'gruff'. Putting it bluntly I took an instant dislke to her, and was wary as with ds you need to know what your doing.

This was all due to be raised at ds's school review on Wednesday.

She brought him back this afternoon, very red in the face and immediately started screaming at me, 'he keeps attacking me, it's only me he goes, he's broke my glasses and I need to get them fixed, and so on. I listened calmly then said 'having heard the way you scream at him, i'm not surprised he's been kicking off' Then slammed the door in her face Blush

I immediately phoned the school, said I wasn't happy with what had happened or the way she has spoken to ds, blah, blah, blah and I will be taking him (and dd, they're at the same school now) in myself until an alternative is found.

Went to find ds, in his usual position, on the sofa, hands over ears and blanket over head to ask what happened (find the trigger) and give the not hurt speech.

I asked why he hurt the lady on the bus ?

He said the lady shouting, she hurt me.

I asked how she hurt him, he said 'lady dragged me off the bus, she hurt my hand'

I asked 'how did that happen ?

He said ' smacking it' and started hitting himself.

Immediately phoned school again and let them know i'm not happy about this,etc also asked dd who confirmed ds was dragged off the bus and pushed up against the bus

What's going to happen now ?

Does anybody know ?

Sure she won't be able to continue in that job ? There are extremely vulnerable children on that bus, some are non verbal and violent so couldnt tell. I don't think she realised how good ds's verbal skills are as he only talks when he feels like it but is actually a real blabbermouth !

And now I feel like crap for not sorting out the bus issue in the beginning .AngrySad

OP posts:
daisy5678 · 11/10/2010 23:07

Sad and Angry for you and your son. It's a police matter as it was assault. You should ring them and report it - tell the school that you will do so. It's disgusting that an adult can treat a child in this way.

giraffesCantDookForApples · 11/10/2010 23:09

Shock Thats awful.

Original poster
ApocalypseCheese · 11/10/2010 23:23

Can I make it a police issue ??

There arent any marks that I can see, however ds is very insistent and I will be letting the school know that I expect this to be taken seriously etc

Tbh i'm quite shocked that the school has no contact at all really with the escorts (I spoke to ds's respite carer and a few teachers who's numbers I have ) and none of them could say who took him. Hmm

OP posts:
equator · 12/10/2010 06:12

Holy shit, that is bad.
In ds's school they have no power over the escort/driver.
I would be on the phone to the transport dept as well as school.

mariagoretti · 12/10/2010 06:37

Best to report it to someone very official. ASAP. Police child protection might be a tiny bit OTT but actually not very, it is an assault albeit a small one.

This is unlikely to be the first time she's hit a child and I wouldn't be surprised if she protects herself in incident books by documenting all sorts of bruises and incidents to make it look like dcs' parents have been heavy-handed.

kidsncatsnwine · 12/10/2010 07:06

The school don't know who TOOK him?!?! Seriously?!?!

I'm both a parent of a child at Special School and a T.A there.. and we damn well know every escort. The taxi service itself will be contracted to your LEA,there will be a transport officer. Find out who it is and put a complaint in immediately.
I would inform the taxi company that you will be pressing assault and battery charges ( sounds dramatic but that IS the legal term for being hurt without leaving injuries)..and yes contact the police... the escort needs to be sacked.

Don't be bullied into having to take DS yourself tho..because the taxi service may continue to claim for him until official with the transport service! peak to the LEA officer asap and insist on a diff taxi firm...

Hope DS is ok:( That is just horrible:(

2shoescreepingthroughblood · 12/10/2010 08:20

i would report to the police, even if there are no marks, the escort is a position of trust and she has assaulted your son.

5andahead · 12/10/2010 08:24

So sorry this has happened. How awful for your DS :(

DS2s escort when he was in SN school was employed by the taxi company, who had a contract with the LA. Do you have a number for school transport as they would be the best people to speak to for a start.

Unsure of police action, the LA might want to take it up with them though.

mamalino · 12/10/2010 08:25

Def contact the transport department and I would report to police also, that is shocking. So sorry for you and DS.

nymphadora · 12/10/2010 08:33

Contact the Local authority transport dept.think you are same LA as me? Schools don't tend to employ them direct & have little input into who gets contract, they can ' have a word' about a minor issue but even without the hitting I would think LA should deal.

2bloodyshoes · 12/10/2010 08:35

am I alone in thinking a escort hitting a child is not a minor issue?

LucindaCarlisle · 12/10/2010 08:39

Report it to the Local Authority transport manager in writing.

nymphadora · 12/10/2010 08:44

I didn't mean it was ! I meant school could speak to the escort re lost coat or something minor whereas this should go to LA as it's a big issue without the hitting. I would be tempted by the police but possibly would be difficult to persuade them on ds word alone.

LucindaCarlisle · 12/10/2010 09:26

Write down exactly what happened when your son came home, and try to recall exactly what the escort said to you at the front door. You could phone up the head teacher and report it all to him/her.

daisy5678 · 12/10/2010 19:47

It so IS a police issue! It's an assault, simple as. It's also made worse by the fact it's an adult on a vulnerable child.

Apocalypsecheese, please let us know what happened with this. Hope you and son are OK.

kerry0115 · 12/10/2010 19:53

omg thats terrible,i used work with children with cerebral palsy and more than few occasions i was close to being knocked out if one of them had an outburst but i would NEVER take it out on the child,im in shock,escort is def in the wrong job .

Original poster
ApocalypseCheese · 13/10/2010 17:04

UPDATE :- Putting it mildly Ethan is the talk of the school, the staff are up in arms over this, he has repeatedly said in school 'the lady hurt my ears, the lady hurt me, she pulled me off the bus and smacked my hands. It stings' Then he cries.

There is no doubt within my mind, or schools that ds was hit, and hit quite hard.

The bus turned up yesterday, (went past it on way to school, obviously i'm taking them myself now, 8 mile round trip twice a day with no car) she's still on it.

Phoned up the transport people at the lea yesterday, was insured it would be taken very seriously and investigated.

She acknowledged the fact that changing transport arrangements can have a huge effect on a lot of the children but that legally the tender had to be put out every 5 yrs. Shock so to hell with the consequences eh Hmm

I pointed out that many of the children are violent, some are non verbal and extremely vulnerable, she agreed with me and told me she would ring back, then didnt Hmm

Took them in again this morning, bus turned up, ( we were late) dp confronted her, she looked very shocked.Smirked at him and said 'I have a clean slate' ( in other words she hasn't been caught) She may not have even known ds could talk as he only does on his terms.

Had review meeting at school this afternoon, lady from LEA was there (who was very charmed by ds) and I made sure she was told every detail,as soon as ds left the room. I saw her writing down that the belief was that ds had been assaulted and he was clearly able to communicate that fact.

Still no phonecall from LEA tho. Phoned them when I got home, they said she can't just be dismissed, statements need to be taken and investigated. In the meantime she continues in the job. Hmm

I replied, I want that harridan gone Blush She isn't right for the job and is working with extremely vulnerable children.

She repeated what she said, offered to repay transport costs Hmm and said she'd get back to me (still hasn't)

In the meantime, i've let my friend know who runs the NAS, who's got her friend involved who works for parent partnership and is v high up in Cumbria County Councils SEN depat and just so happens to be friends with our areas Labour mp Grin.

The entire staff at school know, so she won't get a good reception there (they're disgusted, and were gassing about it in the doorway when I came in for ds's review.

I intend to make that womans a living hell if needs be.

OP posts:
Original poster
ApocalypseCheese · 13/10/2010 17:07

'life' Blush

I'm not very good at being 'ard'

OP posts:
Gotabookaboutit · 13/10/2010 17:48

Normally I would agree with LA and waiting for a formal outcome but as she's such a a smug nasty cow - I would report it as an a assault to the police - will probably be be a NFA outcome but a phone call/interview by an officer would shake her up a bit and make her think a lot harder about doing it again

Minx179 · 13/10/2010 18:54

Humm so a dinner lady who offers a child a biscuit is suspended because somebody judges she may be grooming a child, yet an escort of vulnerable children is alledged to have hit/pulled a child off a bus yet is allowed to stay. Something seriously wrong with this world.

r3dh3d · 13/10/2010 19:49

Who is her actual employer?

The way this usually works is that she is employed by the bus company and the bus company won't give a toss till the LEA threaten to cancel their contract. And LEA - for a quiet life - will claim to have no influence. But it is completely bleedin' obvious that the LEA can require the bus company, as a point of policy and a condition of the contract between them, to put any escort accused of violence towards the kids in their care on gardening leave pending investigation. It's not rocket science.

Actually, as the escort is probably a temp contractor rather than a legal employee, I doubt the bus company would even have to pay her so no skin off their nose. Hence she can be made to disappear (at least for the moment) without anyone breaking a sweat, all it needs is goodwill and common sense all round. That's all. [hollowlaughter]

The problem is usually longer-term as there's no proof and tbh though you know your LO well enough to know this is true, it's just his word against hers and there is no way she can be sacked on that basis. :sigh: I've had to be very underhand to get an escort with a reputation for abusing the kids removed from my child's route. Hopefully she is thin-skinned enough that having everyone in the school and presumably the bus company hate her will make her move on.

beautifulgirls · 13/10/2010 19:50

Surely she should be suspended pending a full investigation, not left in the job until the investigation proves her guilty.

This is appalling. So sorry for your DS.

BaggyCoconut · 13/10/2010 19:57

I am shocked she has not been suspended pending investigation!

We had an small issue with our DDs previous escort. Much smaller than this, just her saying we should not give DD her epilepsy medication as it was causing hyperactivity, and the escort didnt like the noise. Escort was very rude about it to me. I phone the transport department. She was spoken to that day, and acted very differently from the next day. The LEA told us she would be disaplined if she acted unproffessionally again! And they got my DD onto a new route pretty quickly

So for an assult I would say she should be suspended while they look into it!

BaggyCoconut · 13/10/2010 19:58

Oh and just thought I would add, good friend of mine works as an escort and she has had her fair share of incidents.....but she stays calm, thats the sort of person that should do the job. The shouting alone is too much IMO.

daisy5678 · 13/10/2010 19:58

Shock can't believe that she's not suspended pending investigation. That's what would happen in a school.